The Latin Grammys were last night. Since no one cares about them, I’m going to go ahead and assume Sofia Vergara, Shakira, Zoe Saldana, and Blanca Soto (who?) won everything, then tidied up their own hotel rooms.
I realize when you’re listening to NPR and adding stuff to your Urban Outfitters wishlist and trying to come up with a funny and ironic name for your bowling team (“I Can’t Believe It’s Not Gutter”, I’m looking at you Steven), you think you’re listening to the voice of logic and reason. But, I have a higher calling. And that calling is to listen to anything a skinny, hot chick tells me.
“Love it, love it, love it — can’t live without it! I love sex,” the Avatar star, 31, admits in the April issue of Essence. “I love skin. I don’t believe the body is something to hide.” “I think in American society, we’re messing up our kids by taking away the education on awareness of sexuality and replacing it with violence, guns and video games,” she says. “We’re breeding little criminals.”…”I want to have more sex, travel more, drink more wine and love life.”
I’m not even sure why I thought this would be a good post. I saw “sex” and “more sex” and Zoe’s legs and I kinda just blacked out. I don’t know if Ben Roethlisberger slipped me something or what, but I’d like to think he knows a great ass when he sees one. Anyway, next.
Zoe Saldana showed up to the Avatar premiere last night, and I’m not sure if she got my letters or not, but when I said I would drill her until we were no longer dependent on foreign oil, I meant that as a compliment.