In what might be the most adorable couple of 2017, Spider-Man: Homecoming‘s Tom Holland and Zendaya are now dating. Take it away, People.
“They started seeing each other while they were filming Spider-Man,” says the source. “They’ve been super careful to keep it private and out of the public eye but they’ve gone on vacations with each other and try and spend as much time as possible with one another.” Adds an insider: “They’re both really ambitious and they challenge each other — but, most importantly, they make each other crack up. They seem to have a really similar sense of humor and love joking around together. They have great banter back and forth.”
Tom Holland seems super chill and funny in real life. That sounds like it would be good news to Zendaya. And Zendaya seems super chill and funny in real life and is also hot. That sounds like it would be good news to Tom Holland. Zom Holland? ZenTom? Hollandaya? Sorry, I’m new at this.
Remember when people lost their shit because they thought Zendaya would be playing Mary Jane because MARY JANE IS WHITE NOT BLACK AND OMG THIS MEANS WHITE GENOCIDE HANG ON FOR ONE SEC THANKS FOR THE WARNING OFFICER I WON’T DRIVE WITH DRUGS IN THE CAR AGAIN BUT BACK TO WHAT I WAS SAYING ABOUT WHITE GENOCIDE. That was weird. Turns out she’s not playing Mary Jane, so the integrity of the comic book about a dude in a leotard getting bit by a magic spider remains intact. We really avoided a national nightmare and panic in the streets there. But Peter Parker has crush on a girl in the new movie and she’s a hot black chick SO HOLD ON WE MUST TAKE TO THE STREETS AND BOYCOTT MARVEL OMG WHITE PEOPLE. Typing in all caps is fun. I can see why people on the Internet do it. Also, I know the movie is called Spider-Man: Homecoming, but “Zendaya Did The Spider-Man: Homecoming Premiere” wouldn’t fit on a single line. Is that ok with you? Don’t tell me how o do my job. That’s racist.
E!’s Fashion Police is a culturally relevant and enlightening show where D-list white chicks and a gay guy attempt to eviscerate women with better careers by simply panning a camera up and down their bodies and questioning their wardrobe choices even though Giuliana Rancic looks like she has a number tattooed on her wrist. So when Zendaya appeared on the 2015 Oscar’s red carpet in a Vivienne Westwood gown and dreadlocks to celebrate her culture, it got a little confusing for the white people. Take it away Rancic:
“I feel that she smells like patchouli oil… or weed. Yeah, maybe weed.”
Oh, I know! Such a harmless joke! Why can’t people who have been constantly stereotyped because of their hair and endure the negative connotations because they choose to wear their hair naturally?! People need to lighten up! Or not. Take it away, Zendaya.
“There is a fine line between what is funny and disrespectful,” she wrote. “Someone said something about my hair at the Oscars that left me in awe. Not because I was relishing in rave outfit reviews, but because I was hit with ignorant slurs and pure disrespect. To say that an 18-year-old young woman with locs must smell of patchouli oil or ‘weed’ is not only a stereotype, but outrageously offensive.” (read full rant here)
Immediately, Giuliana Rancic tweeted a whitesplained apology and Kelly Osbournethreatened to leave the show because Zendaya is her friend (even though she didn’t say fuck all on the show after Rancic made her comments). Of course, Osbourne was only feigning offense and would never leave the show, because what the fuck else is she gonna do? Anyway, Zendaya has yet to respond, but to make sure she isn’t seen as an accidental racist, Giuliana Rancic addressed the people of Earth last night.
Rancic could have replaced all the words in this video with, “oh god plz don’t fire me” and it would have meant the same thing, but if she really wants to smell weed on somebody with dreadlocks, I’d like to invite her to come to Decatur. I can introduce her to all the trust fund white kids who are discovering themselves while talking a lot about organic coffee and dolphin massacres.