James Cameron Hates ‘Wonder Woman’
James Cameron Hates ‘Wonder Woman’

 

James Cameron is like a smarter Michael Bay and you know all of his movies. One of them is probably your favorite. I don’t need to list them all here. But this why we’re here: he sat down for an interview with The Guardian and dared to have an opinion on Wonder Woman. Silly, James. You know old white men aren’t allowed to have opinions anymore lol.

“All of the self-congratulatory back-patting Hollywood’s been doing over Wonder Woman has been so misguided. She’s an objectified icon, and it’s just male Hollywood doing the same old thing! I’m not saying I didn’t like the movie but, to me, it’s a step backwards. Sarah Connor was not a beauty icon. She was strong, she was troubled, she was a terrible mother, and she earned the respect of the audience through pure grit. And to me, [the benefit of characters like Sarah] is so obvious. I mean, half the audience is female!”

It’s 2017, so the first you have to do if you disagree with this is to call James Cameron a sexist or a misogynist, then if you can, dig up bad things he said or did 10-20 years ago, so you can adequately attack the messenger to absolve yourself from having an actual, articulated argument against his message, while also allowing yourself to amass several woke points. It’s a tactic that’s really big on Facebook and Twitter. Is Wonder Woman a good movie? Yes. Does James Cameron have a point? Also yes. Did Wonder Woman look super hot in slo-mo while killing Germans? Yes. Was Steve Trevor the one who actually saved the day? Yes. Was Wonder Woman’s fight at the end of the movie utterly pointless? Also yes. A simple critique of a movie isn’t shitting on the movie. Unless it’s the pile of shit that was the Ghostbusters remake. Y’all really caped for that, huh? Anyway, for Warner Bros. and DC, Wonder Woman represents that single punch McGregor is gonna land against Mayweather if McGregor is Warner Bros. and DC and Mayweather is Marvel in this scenario. The fact that Patty Jenkins made a good film with these idiots should be enough to convince anybody that Hollywood needs more women directors. She also gave a response to James Cameron, but Jenkins must have missed all the feminist takes crying about why Wonder Woman had to be attractive because of “representation”. The lesson here? Just don’t say shit. Don’t say anything. Don’t have an opinion about anything. Happy Friday!

 

 

banner pic = Rolling Stone

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The Koch Brothers Helped Financed ‘Wonder Woman’
The Koch Brothers Helped Financed ‘Wonder Woman’

 

When historians in nuclear fallout shelters want to see what America was up to in 2017, they’ll learn that the most politically divisive movie was about a mythical Amazon lady called Wonder Woman with a magic whip who fights CGI at the end while her male love interest actually saves the day. They’ll probably be less shocked to learn that the Koch Brothers helped pay for it.

The Koch Brothers reportedly helped finance “Wonder Woman” and other films with Bill Gates … and Donald Trump’s Treasury Secretary. The way the story goes … Steven Mnuchin roped Charles Koch, David Koch and Gates into a production company he helped start to finance movies like ‘WW,’ “Dunkirk,” and Spielberg’s upcoming “Ready Player One.” The Koch Brothers struck a $450 million deal in 2013 to become stakeholders in Mnuchin’s company RatPac-Dune Entertainment … and Gates was brought in as an investor for a similar amount. Although Mnuchin has divested from the company because of his gig in Trump’s administration … the Koch Brothers are reportedly still very much involved.  Also worth noting … reps for the Kochs denied investing in RatPac.

The fucking Koch Brothers helping pay for a movie that was supposed to be about female empowerment might be too much irony to take here. That’s like Nancy Pelosi raising money for a Dylan Roof movie or for Jon Ossoff’s campaign. Nice campaign ads, nerd.

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Warner Bros. Wants ‘Wonder Woman’ To Win The Best Picture Oscar
Warner Bros. Wants ‘Wonder Woman’ To Win The Best Picture Oscar

 

Wonder Woman has made $781M and, although the bar was set lower than hell, it is the best DC movie since Nolan left, so obviously Warner Bros. thinks it deserves all the Oscars.

Although executives haven’t commented publicly on their plans, they have internally discussed launching a formidable awards-season campaign for the movie, in the hopes of making it the first comic-book film nominated for best pictureVariety has learned. The studio will also stump Patty Jenkins for best director, which would also be groundbreaking. No director of a comic-book film — not even Christopher Nolan — has ever been nominated, and only men have ruled the category since (and before) Kathryn Bigelow won the Oscar for “The Hurt Locker” in 2010.

Now, I’m sure we can separate a movie that makes a lot of money and the cultural and societal impact of said movie with the realization that said movie has no business winning an Oscar for Best Picture. Wonder Woman isn’t even the best superhero movie of 2017 (*ahem*). Nominated? Sure, whatever. Patty Jenkins deserves an Oscar nomination just because she managed to make a competent DC superhero movie that makes some kind of sense. DC movies are that bad. I can name like 10 movies better than Wonder Woman right now, and that’s fine. I understand that little girls don’t want to dress like the black guy in Get Out or the cannibal chick in Raw. They’ll find a way to go on if Wonder Woman doesn’t win Best Picture.

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‘Wonder Woman’ Made $223M In 4 Days
‘Wonder Woman’ Made $223M In 4 Days

 

According to Box Office Mojo and the site I took the below blockquote from, Wonder Woman will more that likely double its $149M production budget by the end of the week. Somewhere right now, men with Nazi haircuts are crying.

Warner Bros.’ Wonder Woman defied expectations to take $100.5 million in the United States, £6.18 million here in the UK and $222 million worldwide, a record for a female-directed film and the sixth highest non-sequel superhero debut ever. With a budget of $150 million, Wonder Woman is also the costliest film ever directed by a woman.

I’m not gonna turn this into some militant SJW post, but if you can’t realize why this could be a huge deal for some women, then you’re probably just an asshole in your daily life and nobody really likes you. Like, I’ve seen Batman’s parents die four times in four separate movies. Let’s move on. Wonder Woman kicked ass in the movie, but I hope she’s saving her strength for the sequel which will be her biggest fight of all: arguing in the comment sections of Thought Catalog and Teen Vogue articles that say she’s a bad role model for women because she represents unachievable body and fighting standards.

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‘Wonder Woman’ Is Killing It
‘Wonder Woman’ Is Killing It

 

Because all film critics are secretly paid Marvel shills who don’t understand the genius of DC films, Wonder Woman currently holds a 96% on Rotten Tomatoes. Wait. Shit. Let me start that over. Because all film critics review coherent and competent movies favorably, Wonder Woman currently holds a 96% on Rotten Tomatoes. Sorry. I screwed that intro up. Although this might cause some cognitive dissonance for DC fan boys who also hate women. That remains to be seen. Meanwhile, Wonder Woman almost has a higher score than Man Of Steel, Batman v Superman, and Suicide Squad combined. It also has the lowest budget of the three, so it’ll more than likely be the most profitable of the three. If I was Martha, I’d see if I could switch kids.

 

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‘Wonder Woman’ Had A Premiere
‘Wonder Woman’ Had A Premiere

 

The bar is pretty low, but according to early reviews, Wonder Woman is the best DCEU film to date. And that’s awesome. Wonder Woman can beat the living shit out of Batman and Superman (Google it) , so maybe that’s why Superman whines a lot and Batman does Crossfit montages. The film had its premiere at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood last night, but it’s also having a women-only screening at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin, Texas.  You’ll never guess who is upset about it!

That didn’t go over well with some men, judging by the comments on the theater’s Facebook page. “Apparently ‘equality’ is only selective nowadays,” one person wrote. “How about a ‘men’s only’ showing of a movie or is that not how equality works?”

Good lord, just shut up. Can you shut the hell up? If you’re this angry about women being somewhere without you and want to be around a bunch of dudes, go join ISIS, dipshit.

 

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Apparently ‘Wonder Woman’ Is Pretty Good
Apparently ‘Wonder Woman’ Is Pretty Good

 

Wonder Woman had a screening for the media last night, and apparently everybody really like it (you can read what they all said here).  So, let’s get the obvious out of the way here first. When it comes to DC movies, we’ve heard this shit before. Second,  Gal Gadot isn’t really a great actor. If you say she is, you’re lying to yourself. Third, I hope the reviews of this movie aren’t great in the same way the Ghostbusters remake were great. Not liking a movie that’s mostly women doesn’t make you sexist. You don’t have to be afraid of not liking it. Fourth, DC and Warner Bros. have fucked my emotions three times now, and I don’t want to be the abused spouse who keeps getting beat and coming back because I think Geoff Johns will change. Fuck him. Fifth, some of the reviews call Wonder Woman the “best DCEU movie so far”.  And the McGriddle is the best thing at McDonald’s. That’s a really fucking low bar. Sixth of all, please let all this be true. I want to Wonder Woman to resemble an actual movie. I don’t want to sit through another DC movie bored and miserable then be told I just don’t get it. Shit ain’t that deep, bro. Go jack off to your Zack Snyder shrine on your own time. Don’t project that onto me.

 

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‘Wonder Woman’ & ‘IT” Have New Trailers
‘Wonder Woman’ & ‘IT” Have New Trailers

 

Depending on who you ask, trailers for two highly anticipated movies dropped over the weekend or trailers for two movies dropped over the weekend. Here they are.

 

Wonder Woman

 

 

The trailer looks great. Gal Gadot looks great. Some of the shots looks great. It looks like 15 mins of the movie will be slo mo shots which isn’t great. I really, really, really want to like this movie. I really do. But DC is an abusive spouse that we all keep going back to hoping they’ll change. If this movie sucks, I’m going to get DC drunk and burn them alive in bed. I can’t take this shit anymore.

 

IT

 

 

This trailer also looks great. The book was a masterpiece. The acting looks great. At the same time, I know it’s very possible that everyone involved could easily fuck this up. For one, I don’t understand the Pennywise here. Pennywise dressed as a clown to lure kids. This Pennywise is not how you lure kids. I also don’t know if Pennywise is evil in this version because he was forehead-shamed as a kid. Maybe they’ll answer that.

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The New ‘Wonder Woman’ Trailer Looks Pretty Okay, I Guess
The New ‘Wonder Woman’ Trailer Looks Pretty Okay, I Guess

 

I refuse to let myself get excited for DC movies anymore, because they all generally suck, and the people who have seen Wonder Woman already weren’t exactly stingy with the adjectives that mean “suck”. But at least DC make halfway decent trailers. This one for Wonder Woman is obviously the best one even though it gives us an origin story like we haven’t known who Wonder Woman is since 1941. But hopefully the origin story will solve the mystery of why Wonder Woman is the only person on  Themyscira who has an Israeli accent.

 

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Wonder Woman Did Empire
Wonder Woman Did Empire

 

Yesterday, Matt Reeves finally committed to direct The Batman and Nightwing movie was also announced, taking the WB/DCEU potential new film count to 17. SEVENTEEN. If the first three were any indication, WB is gonna continue to throw shit against the wall in hopes it makes enough money to clean up the shit they have to clean up from the last wall. The fourth, Wonder Woman, drops June 2, and depending on who you ask, it’s great or an unmitigated disaster. Kinda like our new President. Anyway, WB has to spend a lot of money on advertising, so Wonder Woman got the cover of Empire Magazine. She looks like she’s about to fight Rotten Tomatoes.

 

Wonder Woman

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