Half-Plastic Woman Suffers Knee Injury

Victoria Silvstedt looks like someone cut a pop-a-shot basketball and glued it to her chest, occasioanly stopping by her house to spray some bronzer all over her body. And don’t get me started on the over-glossed Red Vines she calls lips.

Here she is entering some sort of party DJ’d by Tommy Lee – which automatically makes it the sleaziest party around. Just living up to the sleaze factor, Victoria has some minor knee injuries. Chances of them being doggy-style rug-burns? 1 : 1.

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Jessica Alba Drinks, We Links

Jessica Alba looked like she got TRASHED on New Year’s Eve, probably to see if drunk sex after pregnancy is still awesome. [CityRag]

Instead of suing for divorce, this guy is suing for his kidney. “I want my kidney back” strangely fits in the Chile’s baby-back rib song. [DListed]

Elisha Cuthbert is so hot, why must she tease us with dresses made for 60-year-olds? Next time, no dress would be nice. And much better. [Hollywood Tuna]

Tommy Lee is a douchebag, but his rules for his dressing room do encourage toplessness. We’re having a moral crisis. [Celebslam]

Linda Hogan‘s bare ass: not as gross as the rest of Linda Hogan [Gone-Hollywood]

Patrick Swayze has cancer, but won’t quit smoking. Because no one tells Dalton what to do. [PopCrunch (more…)

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Tommy Lee Talks About His Fight With Kid Rock

In an entry on his website, Tommy Lee explains in bad grammar and run-on sentences his fight with Kid Rock at the VMAs. Tommy says:

Yeah!! …..here I am minding my own biz having a great time with my friend Criss Angel (magician) and watching the MTV awards in the front row saying hello to all my friends……Pamela comes and sits on my lap who I love and adore….and also say hello to my friend Travis Barker and his wife!…..and i get a text from another friend P. Diddy and he says come sit with me…..and he’s sitting with Miss HOT Megan FOX so I go over and sit with P! Not a minute later and Alicia Keys starts her amazing performance….(“I apologize sweetie…..I had nothing to do with the timing and disrespect”)……back to the stupid-ness!!….so….. I get a tap on the shoulder from Kid Pebble…I stand up and embrace him with a semi hug and say “Hey dude…What up”?? He punches me in the face…..well if ya wanna call it that!?….more like a bitch slap!…….Wuss!! Anyway….i go to knock this jealous country bumpkin the f$%k OUT….and before I can have a meeting with my fist and his ugly ass mug ….security guards… grab me and haul my ass outta the award show! So I’m fine and of course leave to my room with police and owner of the Palm’s George Maloof……the rest is paper work and bullshit!… Anyway…… I would like to apologize to Alicia and George and MTV for the disrespectful bullshit caused by a piece of shit called Kid Pebble!!”

Yeah. You see, besides making up insults that sound like cereal, this is exactly the reason Tommy Lee got bitch slapped. This was supposed to be some type of explanation of what happened, but most of it was just him name dropping and kissing ass. Truth is, Tommy, Kid Rock walked up to you in a room full of people and slapped you in the mouth. Nice job. Who are you dressing up as for Halloween? The Michigan Wolverines?

Everything in these pictures is gay:

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Tommy Lee and Kid Rock Got in a Fight

During Alicia Key’s performance at the VMAs last night, Kid Rock beat Tommy Lee down like a little bitch. MTV reports:

According to eyewitnesses, Lee – sitting at the same table as Diddy – jawed at Rock as he made his way toward the Bad Boy CEO, with whom he was supposed to present the show’s final performance. It wasn’t clear exactly what Lee said to Rock, but apparently after his words, Rock slapped the drummer, according to eyewitnesses. Lee, one eyewitness said, attempted to fight back but, before he was able to land a blow, was punched in the face by Rock…Security quickly detained both men, with Lee being immediately removed from the venue. Rock, with his cigar still in his mouth, was held back momentarily until Lee left and calmly walked out alongside security. “I never hit nobody for nothing before,” Rock was overhead saying in the lobby of the casino. “I told him to shut the fuck- up.”According to a spokesperson for the Las Vegas Police Department, Rock was cited for misdemeanor battery for his assault on Lee. Rock was not detained or taken into police custody but was issued a summons. He’ll need to return to Vegas for a future court date, and if convicted, he faces a $500 fine and up to six months behind bars.”

Although no reason for the altercation has been confirmed, it is widely believed they were fighting over Pamela Anderson.That makes sense because who wouldn’t fight over a used up 40 year old with Hep C? You normally only read about women like Pamela Anderson in stories about glass slippers and fairy godmothers.


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Tommy Lee Has Banquette Sex

Tommy Lee offended a bunch of Hamptons snobs this weekend.

Lee’s raunchy bar behavior grossed out a room full of revelers at Dune in the Hamptons on Sunday night when the Motley Crue drummer and a blond party girl “were flat-out [bleep]ing” on a banquette, according to multiple witnesses. One told us, “When Tommy walked in, he asked, ‘Is it cool to have sex in here?’ The hostess thought he was kidding, but . . . then he just went to town with this girl. We were trying not to pay attention because it was so disgusting.”

They were bleeping? Oh my God, not bleeping! I could see @$*&ing or —-ing, but not bleeping!! Only a bunch of thousand dollar sandal wearing, orange skinned Hamptons residents would be dumb enough to let Tommy Lee in their clubs and not expect some sort of bleeping at some point, and then be offended by it. My friend Buffi (with an ‘i’) is now a Hamptons pariah after she was caught in a restroom using chinchilla tampons instead of mink ones. For the record, the chinchilla ones were over a month out of season, so Buffi really was out of line.


Here’s Tommy’s ex (and sex tape co-star), Pamela Anderson, hanging out on the beach with Paris Hilton’s ex (and sex tape co-star), Rick Salomon over the weekend:

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Kim Stewart and Tommy Lee are Dating

I realize Tommy Lee will stick his penis in pretty much anything, but there’s no reason for his standards to be quite this low. Kimberly Stewart (Rod Stewart’s daughter) scoops up Paris Hilton’s leftovers, is hideous and appears to have 6 toes on both of her disgusting feet. Honestly, I’d have more respect for Tommy Lee if he was dating a bucket of KFC chicken. At least he could eat that without throwing up. And it would be funny to watch Pamela Anderson’s head explode.

Kim and Tommy on June 29th:

Update: Here they are again yesterday. Photo courtesy of Celebrity Babylon.

More Kimberly Stewart hotness to add to our bikini theme today:

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