Conan Got A Concussion



During Friday’s taping of The Tonight Show, Conan O’Brien and guest Teri Hatcher decided it would be a good idea for a lanky unathletic white dude in a wet suit to race. It was all working out until the finish line when Conan slipped and got Tim Tebowed. I don’t know who thought to put the finish line 15 yards in on a slippery concrete floor, but instead of having a race next time, they should put a paraplegic in roller skates and push him behind Inspector Gadget’s car after he releases an oil slick, because apparently safety really isn’t that much of a concern.

Teri Hatcher competing in the 2009 Nautica Malibu Triathlon:

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Teri Hatcher is Getting Sued



Hydroderm is suing Teri Hatcher for $2.8 million after they claim the actress breached an exclusive endorsement deal by posing with and encouraging the use of CityLips, Hydroderm’s direct competitor. People says:

Hatcher’s name, image and likeness have been linked to so many competitors’ products (at least 17!) that it is anyone’s guess as to what product keeps her skin and lips youthful,” said the lawsuit. The company is demanding a complete refund of the $2.4 million endorsement deal, plus $400,000 in expenses, all “due immediately.” In a statement, Hatcher’s legal representative called the allegations an “unjustified and public assault on Teri Hatcher’s good name, reputation and celebrity.”

Teri Hatcher’s face looks like a piece of beef jerky that’s been left on the surface of the sun, so I’m not sure how they thought this hag would make them any money. That would be like hiring a child molester to promote your daycare. There’s a real good chance it might not turn into the money making extravaganza you had in mind.

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Teri Hatcher is Still a Bitch



Hey look, another wonderful story about Hollywood’s sweetheart, Teri Hatcher. New York Daily News reports:

For such a little lady, Teri Hatcher needs her freakin’ space. The Desperate Housewife pitched a diva-fit at Thursday afternoon’s Badgley Mischka show, shunning interviews and demanding the backstage W lounge be closed down for herself. We happened to be in the W and graciously got up when Hatcher squealed, “I need these seats.” When the Desperate One spied us listening to her demands to assistants (about her hair, clothing and makeup), her peeps at Badgley M had us removed. We were happy to go.”

Wow, Teri Hatcher better start being more careful. I’d hate for her to get the reputation of being an uncontrollable bitch.

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Teri Hatcher is Wonderful



Apparently no one told Teri Hatcher that she wasn’t the bride because she saw Eva Longoria’s wedding as an opportunity to make herself the center of attention. Hatcher commissioned an outfit from Badgley Mischka that looked like a bridesmaid dress, even though she wasn’t a bridesmaid and, and she used the Paris church, St. Germain l’Auxerroix, as background for a photo op. NY Daily News says:

A private walkway was set up so that as the celebrities exited the bus from the hotel, they could sneak through the fans and paparazzi,” says one guest. “Felicity [Huffman] and Nicolette [Sheridan] walked into the church hand in hand, but Teri took her daughter and walked around into the public area to pose for photos and wave to fans for 10 minutes.”…”It was so strange! Everyone else was so excited to be going into the church for the wedding, and all of a sudden, Teri broke away from the group to make sure she was seen and photographed.”…”All the other girls are very close friends and hang out in each others’ trailers and even at their homes,” says an on-set source. “But Teri never joins in the fun and chat sessions and often runs late for scenes, and causes awkwardness on set.”

There comes a point where you just have to start believing everything you read about Teri Hatcher. Every story you hear about her is pretty much the same, so either the government is using gossip blogs to deliver its anti-Teri Hatcher propaganda, or Teri Hatcher is just a bitch. I’d probably be a bitch too if I was a 42 year old woman who couldn’t keep a man and looked like a scarecrow, but my mom says the ladies can’t resist me. Especially in my penny loafers and bow tie. Can’t touch this!

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