Britney Spears is Very Smart



Hey, you remember not too long ago when the possibility of Britney Spears being tasered and dragged to a padded room by a stick collar because she tried to fight an oncoming bus with a toy lightsaber was very real? Yeah, during that time she was hanging out with stalker Sam Lutfi and dating a paparazzo named Adnan Ghalib. Boy, it sure is a good thing her dad took control of her life so she couldn’t contact them anymore. Or not. People reports:
So when the 27-year-old pop star managed to get a prepaid cell phone recently, her security team confiscated it from her purse while she was at a dance practice. Confronted, she revealed the phone was given to her by someone during a hotel stay. And that person, she disclosed, got it from two men whom her father wants to keep permanently in the singer’s troubled past: ex-manager Sam Lutfi and former boyfriend, paparazzo Adnan Ghalib. Jamie Spears described the cellular phone incident in testimony Monday in a Los Angeles court as he sought to maintain a restraining order against Lutfi, whom Jamie has claimed harassed Britney and has sought to undermine Jamie’s legal control over her life.

My god, this hillbilly is dumb. Can’t we just blindfold her and leave her in the woods somewhere? I mean, that’s humane. My ex-girlfriend told the police she learned a lot about herself during the experience.

It’s hairy day!

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Britney Spears Gets A Restraining Order

For every Britney (turn, turn, turn) there is a season (turn, turn, turn).

Britney Spears is pissed at her old flings Sam Lutfi, the guy who was her “manager,” if manager means drugging your client and controlling her, and Adnan Ghalib, the paparazzi with the landing strip facial hair who smells like vagina in my mind. The Spears conservatorship has filed a restraining order against these two.

One of the lawyers in the case filed a declaration saying over the past month she received “multiple telephone calls and text messages from Lutfi.” She says Lutfi wanted to set up an urgent meeting to “speak with Mr. Spears and me with regard to what he claimed was ‘information he had received about Mr. Spears and his daughter, Britney Spears as well as others.'” The attorney also says Lutfi claimed “he had been talking with Adnan Ghalib about the conservatorship and Ms. Spears’ status as a conservatee.”

In another document, one of the conservatorship lawyers claims “Mr. Lutfi has sent text messages and instant messages that contain false and hurtful allegations concerning Mr. Spears, Ms. Spears, and the Spears family.” The lawyer continues, “Mr. Lutfi, Adnan Ghalib, and Jon Eardley sought unsuccessfully to induce an attorney to file” false statements with the court.

The papers make it clear….”Over the past month, Ms. Spears has had numerous telephone conversations with both Mr. Lutfi and Mr. Ghalib and has exchanged numerous text messages with both of them.” But we’re told now Brit is so mad at them she wants them locked up.

My favorite Britney Spears was the sexy, forbidden, virgin one. Even though she wasn’t a virgin, she was a lot more alluring than kids/crazy Britney or current puppet Britney. So I got pictures of Britney Spears v1.0, because Circus-era Britney Spears always looks dead behind the eyes.

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Britney Spears Has Great Friends



The details of Osama “Sam” Lufti’s deposition with Federline’s lawyer, Mark David Kaplan, have yet to be released, but it has been hinted that Lufti has brokered a deal on behalf of Spears with a paparazzi photo agency – in which Spears’ gets a cut of the profits. It has also been hinted that Lufti is a fucking douchebag. Page Six says:

Britney Spears’ constant companion and “manager,” Sam Lufti, had three restraining orders taken out against him in California before hopping on the pop tart’s crazy-train. Danny Haines, one of the people who obtained a court order, says Lufti told him he should “just kill himself” when their friendship soured. Lufti was “more jealous than a lover,” Haines tells Blender magazine. He says Lufti would go to extremes, telling him he was a “worthless mother[bleeper]” one minute and that he “loved” him the next. When Haines eventually cut him off, Lufti humiliated him, e-mailing naked photos of him to his family, friends and co-workers. He texted and called incessantly and, according to court documents, told Haines he hoped his sister would be “raped to death.” Haines says that in one e-mail to him, Lufti wrote of Haines’ mother that he hoped “Satan devours her flesh and bones” and he looked forward to the day when he would “piss on her burial.”

So from what we can tell, Lufti is gay and insane. Awesome. Britney better careful, because one time a crazy gay attacked me, and I only survived by showing him my new versatile and chic Prada messenger bag. With my instantly effective and suprisingly simple self-defense techniques, you too can protect yourself from gay attackers. Call today!!

Britney at the Millennium Dance Studio last night. (Warning: One of her ugly tits falls out of her shirt at one point, so this is probably NSFW(L).)


Britney at the Hustler store in Hollywood last night:

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