Nicole Richie is In and Out of Jail

The LA District Attorney has been under fire lately for blatantly kissing celebrity asses, but rest assured, Nicole Richie will not get preferential treatment. I don’t care how famous you are, you just don’t do what Nicole did and escape this easily. When police pulled her over last December as she was talking on her cell phone and going the wrong way down an exit ramp high on marijuana and Vicodin, that was her second DUI arrest. The first was in 2002 when was pulled over for driving 40 miles over the limit then promptly blowing a .13. Oh, and let’s not forget the time in 2003 when she was convicted of heroin possession and driving with a suspended license. There’s no way the LA District Attorney can give her a free pass this time:

Nicole was released from jail Thursday after serving 82 minutes of a four-day sentence for driving under the influence of drugs. The reality show star, who checked into a women’s jail at 3:15 p.m., was released at 4:37 p.m. “based on her sentence and federal guidelines,” Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Deputy Maribel Rizo said without elaborating. Under a federal court mandate to manage jail overcrowding, arrestees sentenced to 30 days or less for a nonviolent offense are usually released within 12 hours, the sheriff’s department said in a statement….Her time at the Century Regional Detention Facility was spent getting booked, including taking a mugshot and submitting her fingerprints, Holley said. She didn’t reach her jail cell. “She was really treated like any other inmate,” Holley said. “I think every inmate in her position, with that type of charge, would have been treated as she was.”

82 minutes. 82 fucking minutes. Jesus, LA county is a drunk driver’s Magic Kingdom. I’m surprised they don’t have DJs and cocktail waitresses at every DUI checkpoint. You gotta keep that party going, baby.

Nicole on August 15th:


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Nicole Richie Will Learn Her Lesson

Nicole Richie, who was convicted of her second DUI last week and sentenced to four days in jail, has requested that she serve her time at the same place Paris did, Century Regional Detention Facility in Lynwood. On December 11, 2006, Nicole Richie was arrested after police pulled her over for going the wrong way down an exit ramp on the 134 Freeway in Burbank while she was high on marijuana and Vicodin. The Sun says:

A spokesman for the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said: “Nicole’s attorney contacted us and indicated she wants to do her time there.” Which jail Nicole, who is four months pregnant, will actually go to is still up in there. The spokesman added: “That’s all determined by our medical staff upon her arrival.”

Man, it must be great to live in L.A., not having to worry about such things as “punishment.” Murder your wife and her friend? Hey man, no worries. Leave coke in your car and flee the scene of an accident? Homey, chill. Get fucked up and drive the wrong way down an exit ramp? Relax, dude. We got you covered. You got a second DUI, so you’ve sorta tied our hands here, but how does four days sound? Great. Just let us know where you want to stay, because after all, you’re a such big star you know.

Nicole and Joel in L.A. yesterday:

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Nicole Richie Confirms She’s Pregnant

Soon to be jailed for DUI, Nicole Richie, used the softly lit, flatteringly filtered lenses at Good Morning America and 20/20 to finally admit the obvious. ABC News reports:

In an exclusive television interview with ABC News’ Diane Sawyer, Nicole Richie confirms for the first time she is pregnant with Good Charlotte singer Joel Madden’s baby.

“Yes, I am. We are. I’m almost four months,” Richie told Sawyer.”

Wow. How embarrassing it would be to go all the way to Diane Sawyer to admit you got impregnated by one of the dorks from Good Charlotte. That’s almost as embarrassing as going all the way to Diane Sawyer to admit you had sex with Nicole Richie.

Nicole Richie on her way to finding out she’ll be pregnant in jail:

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Nicole Richie is Pregnant and Going to Jail

Nicole Richie showed up to court today to face charges for second DUI conviction, and was sentenced to four days in jail with six hours time served. TMZ reports:

A court commissioner sentenced Richie, represented by uber-lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley, to serve four days in the City or County Jail (her choice!) — she got credit for a fifth day, for the six hours she served after being busted.

Richie was also fined $2,048, was ordered back to school for 21 days to an alcohol education course and on three years probation.

Richie must report to serve her time by September 28.

The commissioner issued Richie a stern warning, telling her if she she drove drunk again and she actually killed someone she could be charged with murder — not manslaughter. That’s because after her first DUI, Richie agreed that if she drove under the influence and killed someone, she’d be nailed for murder.

The 25-year-old is expected to give birth sometime in January.”

I hate Nicole Richie, so to me this news is like the morning sun or the sound of a child’s laughter. Unless it’s Nicole Richie’s child’s laughter, then it would sound something like a rabid dog or a Velociraptor and that would scare me.

Nicole and Joel earlier this month:

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Nicole Richie Should Be in Jail

While Paris Hilton is off to jail and Lindsay Lohan is due in court, Nicole Richie has apparently slipped through the iron fist of California law enforcement and presently retains driving privileges. Surprised?

…Deputy District Attorney Ed Greene, a prosecutor assigned to Nicole’s DUI case, who admitted, “I am a little surprised too.” However, Greene pointed out that until Richie is actually convicted of DUI, the decision to revoke or suspend her license is up to the folks at the California DMV. Greene added, “They generally do it quicker than this.” We contacted the California DMV to try and get some answers, and the rep said: “I have no idea why Nicole still has her license.”

Just so we’re perfectly clear, Nicole Richie was arrested and charged with heroin possession and driving with a suspended license in February 2003. Last December, Richie was charged with a DUI after driving the wrong way down an exit ramp high on marijuana and Vicodin. Jesus, what does it take to get your license taken away in California? Does a backpack have to be stuck to your grill or isn’t swerving into the school zone while you’re drunk enough? Do you have to get out and set the old lady who you ran over on fire, too, or is just her just being paralyzed good enough for them to start the paperwork? I’d rather take a ride with Stunt Man Mike than walk down the street in California.

Nicole yesterday in L.A.:

Note: That horrifying banner picture of her in the orange dress is from last weekend.

Source: TMZ

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