If you were somehow under the impression that the Megyn Kelly “exclusive” interview of Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar (haha, Jim Bob! I put Michelle’s name first!) would be a documentary about the dangers of abstinence-only education and righteous indignation as told by one hypocrite and a person who looks like she escaped a bunker 20 years ago and still doesn’t realize it, congratulations. It was a shitshow. First, let’s start with Michelle Duggar. Look at her. As far as she’s concerned, Jim Bob is God. This is what fundamentalism breeds besides a lot of children. This is a woman who has been so completely and utterly brainwashed, that she is unable to see the systematic psychological abuse that’s been inflicted on her to the point that she will go on national television and say “it was kinda rape but it wasn’t rape rape and the girls were asleep so it’s all good”. This woman doesn’t deserve our ridicule or scorn, except maybe for her hair and garments of mixed fibers, this woman needs to be rescued before Jim Bob has her making Kool-Aid in Duggartown, Guyana. And as for, Jim Bob, fuck him. Fuck him and the culture he has implemented where his first born son’s had to discover sex by fondling his sisters because any other way would send them to hell, then tell his son he’s been forgiven after his sisters had to endure 3 years and 16 months for any resolution and justice that has still escaped them. Fuck Jim Bob for hearing Josh tell him THREE times “hey, I’m touching my sisters while they’re sleeping, you wanna like, do something?” and still keeping Josh in the house only, and only until, Josh tried to finger bang the babysitter, leaving Jim Bob no choice but to act. And by “act”, I mean do everything he could with his law enforcement and political connections to attempt to make sure this never saw the light of day. Fuck Jim Bob for repeatedly emphasizing ad nauseum that the abuse happened “while the girls were sleeping” to imply that made it less horrific because the girls didn’t know. Fuck Jim Bob for playing the Christian persecution card by saying the real tragedy here a liberal agenda and the police department who leaking sealed juvenile records (sidenote: Fox News being outraged by someone posting juvenile records is irony you can choke on. Man, good thing Trayvon Martin wasn’t a pedophile) Fuck Jim Bob for saying “this has all been taken care of year ago” meaning, “Josh won’t be put in jail, so no harm done.” Fuck Jim Bob for not calling Josh a pedophile because of a legal technicality (Josh was a 15, a pedophile has to be 15), but a transgendered man shouldn’t be allowed in a bathroom to piss because he’ll rape your children. Fuck Jim Bob and all Christian hypocrisy that doesn’t require them to be perfect but they require you to be. Fuck Jim Bob for saying God has forgiven Josh. How do you know? Seriously, like how the fuck do you know? And what would they have done if a neighbor molested their daughters? What would they have done if Josh had been molested? Would they have let the statute of limitations run out? Would they have asked God’s grace and asked mercy for Josh’s abuser? You don’t have to answer these because they’re all rhetorical. Oh, before I forget. Jessa, if you’re allowed to read this. Call me, girl.