Megan Fox Looked Like This At The Kid’s Choice Awards

┬áIf the four pages of pictures of Megan Fox at the Kid’s Choice Awards are any indication, this piece of ass is incapable of taking a bad picture. I know what you’re saying. “But, Todd. What about her thumbs?”. A good test to see if you’re gay or not is to say that out loud to anybody standing near you while showing them these pictures. Don’t be surprised if Bryan Singer pokes you on Facebook and asks if you wanna see his hot tub, you know, because you’re obviously really gay.

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Hey Boo
Hey Boo

 

Nobody has stepped in to stop this Ninja Turtles movie from happening yet, so now it's time to promote it, and what better what way than Megan Fox's hot ass suggestively pulling up her dress on the cover of a magazine that hates women for than the Supreme Court? She does an interview where she wants women to own their sexuality or whatever (we still need to tell women that?), but she also says her perfect date is "sushi and third base" and that she owns a bunch of La Perla. Not sure how I'm going to kill Brian Austin Green yet since 90210 did a pretty good job of that already.

 

Megan Fox Cosmo

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Megan Fox Isn’t Jennifer Love Hewitt

Remember what I said about Jennifer Love Hewitt? Well, I'm not a physicist, but I understand that sometimes, something can violate every natural law of the universe. Case in point: Here's Megan Fox on the set of the abomination that will be TMNT, 7 weeks after giving birth to her SECOND kid. I can't stress that enough. This is what Megan Fox looks like after two two of Green's sperm fertilized two of her eggs. I should have prefaced this by saying Megan Fox is 27. We're in the red here, but not yet. She's good for about three more seasons then she'll be traded to the Washington Redskins for a 6th round draft pick.

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Megan Fox Named Her Kid Bodhi Ransom Green
Megan Fox Named Her Kid Bodhi Ransom Green

 

She so lucky she's hot. So, so lucky.

According to a birth certificate obtained by the site, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles star gave birth to Bodhi Ransom Green on Feb. 12.

I mean, anybody who gets a tattoo of Marilyn Monroe possesses limited intelligence and a complete lack of understanding of American icons they worship, so it shouldn't really come as a surprise that Megan Fox gave her kid a dumb ass name. Bodhi Green. Sounds like Jewish surfer or a strain of weed. But please understand, Brian Austin Green isn't at fault here. She was probably blowing him when they were picking out names and he just nodded at everything. If Megan Fox let me get her pregnant, I'd let her name it Unicorn Monster Truck Glitter. I don't even give a fuck.

 

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Megan Fox Had Her Second Kid
Megan Fox Had Her Second Kid

 

Brian Austin Green's insemination game is too strong. Too strong. Too Fab reports:

It's a boy! Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green welcomed their second child together, toofab has exclusively learned. This is the second boy for the couple, who welcomed son Noah in September 2012, and the third son for Green — who also has 11-year-old Kassius with ex Vanessa Marcil. No other details about the baby were immediately made available.

Hey, remember that three year run on here when basically every single post was a Megan Fox post and I described in great detail what my penis and I would do to her? Yep. Still would. Glad we had this talk.

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Megan Fox Is Pregnant Again
Megan Fox Is Pregnant Again

 

After giving birth to her first child with Brian Autin Green only 9 months ago, Megan Fox is already pregnant with their second. Congrats to Green's penis. Page Six reports:

Megan Fox is pregnant with her second child with husband Brian Austin Green, Page Six has exclusively confirmed. Fox is represented by top publicist Leslie Sloane Zelnick, who told us, “I can confirm Megan is expecting her second child with her husband Brian, they are both very happy.”

I don't know what took so long, because if it was me, Megan Fox would be pregnant every 11 months. I know doctors say you're supposed to wait 8 weeks to have sex after she has a baby, but what does her dentist say? Don't kill my vibe, bro.

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