Lindsay Lohan Said A Guy Beat Her Up
Lindsay Lohan Said A Guy Beat Her Up


The last time we heard from Lindsay Lohan she had a meltdown in a NYC bar while screaming racist shit. But good news for Lindsay! Being an alleged victim of domestic violence doesn’t make her look bad. She posted this pic on Instagram yesterday then immediately deleted it. 


Lindsay Lohan


So who is this mystery man? She didn’t say. According to Radar Online, it isn’t her boyfriend.

Lindsay was last known to be dating Italian businessman Mathia Milani, however, the two have not been photographed together since June 2015, there is no indication that he has any involvement in her injury.

For the sake of argument, if I was to it Lindsay Lohan, I don’t think I’d aim for her shin. Not saying Lindsay is lying, but Lindsay lies about pretty much everything. If some dude did hit her, I hope she deleted the pic after he agreed to pay the negotiated rate. 


Lindsay performing with Duran Duran in December. I don’t know either. 



[  h/t ONTD, But That’s None of My Business  ]

[  pic via The Shade Room  

[  banner pic via Instagram  ]

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Hey, It’s Lindsay Lohan Topless In A Volcano
 

Yes, volcanic mud to clear alway the negativity. But you have to do it like this! And it’s awesome

A photo posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on



At some point we kinda knew that Lindsay Lohan would eventually run out of places to be topless and end up topless inside a volcano, so here she is. Topless in a volcano. How can she afford it? Maybe check her secure site and look at her pricing menu.



*Cash only *Some offers not available in the contiguous United States.

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The Lohans Hate Jennifer Lawrence
The Lohans Hate Jennifer Lawrence


Apparently Jennifer Lawrence was “ill and vomiting” right before the Joy premiere, and I guess she’s all right now. All right as Jennifer Lawrence can be. Then she went on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. Either the Lohan’s watch that or their Google alerts are very robust.

“I’m a puker. I don’t stop working . . . until eventually my body’s just like, ‘If we don’t make her barf or pass out, she won’t stop…I get, like, Lindsay Lohan-grade exhaustion, but without any drugs or alcohol.”

They didn’t take it well.



I legit forgot there was an “Ali Lohan”, and I really don’t think Maya Angelou appreciates being involved in this. And it’s not like you can mention Lindsay Lohan without mentioning drugs and alcohol. That’s like having a GOP without mentioning which brown people are ruining America this time.


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Lindsay Lohan Loves Dressing Like The Woman Charles Manson’s Family Killed
 

A photo posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on



If you were wondering if Lindsay Lohan was still doing drugs, that mystery has been solved because she posted this on Instagram.

#cancer meets #AQUARIUS I LOVE SHARON TATE #themeLOOK

Not that I need to tell you, but Sharon Tate was a 26-year old actress who was 8 months pregnant with Roman Polanski’s baby when she was killed along with four other people by members of the Manson Family. Tate was stabbed 16 times and had a rope tied around neck. I guess she also had really good taste in clothes for that time period.


Let’s move on to something less morbid. Play us out, Charles.


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Lindsay Lohan Seems Pretty Stable
Lindsay Lohan Seems Pretty Stable


Lindsay Lohan wrote this on Instagram yesterday after she couldn’t attend the Toronto Film Festival.  Name that drug.


they always come back. I love you NYC they always come back. I love you NYC  #godblesstheworld #michaeljackson #rip miss you as my real only private friend. For you: god, for all hurts and wrongs, please let me forgive, Allah please let me be forgiven, and all forgive themselves. Please and thank you. (Someone I was with the night before several towers fell, it felt like not a curse, but more like a spell.. What we think in America is not always clear, we don’t have @peta commercials / you just kill deer….with this being said, I’m a girl with a reputation mislead… Like a diamond in the rough, you, now, for 25 years have seen me on TV and screen.. So i am programmed to stand tough. Black or white – in life, rather than love we create a fight of an ideal situation of an unexceptional, yet unacceptable future that @TMZ @Eonline @HarveylevinTMZ & #harveyweinstein ..couldn’t and wouldn’t even care to describe any thought of the people we forget to help when a franchise film comes out and, If money means more than freedom- than stay in California. If helping others is a passion, talk to angelina jolie… If you want to be a brilliant actress, work wth Meryl Streep …at the end of the day- republican or democrats — BE HERE NOW @oprah and live with integrity. Or go to sleep. The most beautiful life comes cheap. Stop fighting and using artists for distractions. It’s boring…  #UnitedNations

El Chapo was in the room. I don’t get why Lindsay didn’t have him proofread this.

 

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Lindsay Lohan Said She Got Drugged At A Wedding, Ran Around Naked
Lindsay Lohan Said She Got Drugged At A Wedding, Ran Around Naked


For some reason, multi-millionaire and consul general and ambassador of tourism for the Seychelles (Google is your friend?), Justin Etzin, is friends with Lindsay Lohan (seen here wearing a crown and a white dress to a wedding). He thought it would be a good idea to invite her to his four day wedding to model Lana Zakocela in Florence last week. Lindsay then Lindsay’d hard. 

(more…)

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Afternoon Dump – Tuesday

Max von Sydow will be on S6 of Game of Thrones. Someone please hold me.

Scott Walker got trolled so hard he enrolled in college

Ronda Rousey is starring in her own autobiography’s bio pic

The Duggars are broke and begging fans to buy their shitty t-shirts

Vanna White topless in the 80s

 Two people got shot and died at OVOFest. These two people were not Drake and Meek Mill

Kelly Osbourne thinks all Latinos clean toilets

Beyonce dropped $312K on a pair of shoes

Here’s a video of a cop and a baby skunk with its head stuck in a yogurt cup

Allure Magazine ran an Afro-style tutorial. They used a white model.

Kentucky cops handcuff 8-year olds with disabilities now

Lenny Kravitz split his pants and flashed his dick at a concert in Stokholm

Iggy Azalea admits to having a nose job

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Lindsay Lohan Isn’t The One In The Bikini

Greece’s economy collapsed and Lindsay Lohan‘s tits have collapsed, so I guess it makes sense that she’s in Mykonos right now. MPs are preparing for a second vote on bailout reforms, and Lindsay Lohan brought a friend with bigger tits so I would post these pictures. I hope you understand what I’m saying. Comparing these two scenarios has proved more difficult than I originally thought.

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Lindsay Lohan Found A New Revenue Stream
Lindsay Lohan Found A New Revenue Stream

Zimmer Ice Lab must not have a lot of money in their marketing budget, because here’s Lindsay Lohan on Instagram showing you the benefits of cryotherapy. Not only does it treat and repair tissue damage, you also come out super high.

Lindsay Lohan Cryotherapy

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Lindsay Lohan Has 21 Days To Do 105 Hours Of Community Service

BREAKING: Lindsay Lohan does dumb shit.

Lindsay Lohan has come up “woefully short” with her remaining community service hours and should face arrest as soon as she returns to the U.S. from London, a California prosecutor said Wednesday. The “Mean Girls” star is due for a probation progress report Thursday, and so far she’s completed less than 20 hours of the 125 additional community service hours she agreed to complete by May 28, Santa Monica City Attorney Terry White told the Daily News. “We’ll probably ask that her probation be revoked,” White said Wednesday. “It doesn’t appear she’s taking it very seriously.” Lohan received the extra hours after White challenged the log sheet she submitted in January to satisfy the sentence in her 2012 reckless driving conviction. “She’s had more than enough opportunity to finish. But she turned in some hours that were extremely suspect, that the court disallowed, and now, given the last chance of all last chances, she’s come up.”

Lindsay completed 240 hours of community service back in January at the very last possible minute, so never underestimate the last minute scheduling of a woman who loves coke more than she fears jail. She’s gonna get this time done, because nobody in prison is gonna pay her an eight ball to jack off on her tits.

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