Bristol Palin’s Reality Show Is Sure To Be A Huge Success

In case you haven’t heard, Bristol Palin has a new reality show premiering on Lifetime called Life Is A Tripp (see because her kid is named Tripp and she hasn’t milked that whole situation enough), and apparently it’s so mind-numbingly boring that the dude partly responsible for Bristol having a show wants no part of it. Radar Online reports:

The daughter of former Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin wanted Levi Johnston to be on her latest television project, but has exclusively learned that he turned her down flat. “Bristol asked Levi to be on the show,” a source said about the 21-year-old single mother. “But, he said no way; Levi didn’t want to be a part of her reality show at all.” The source said that Bristol has been filming the show in her home state of Alaska, but so far it doesn’t look like it’s going to make for riveting viewing. “Everyone has seen her with the cameras,” the source said, but added, “it doesn’t look like she’s done that many interesting things.”

Now after reading that, here’s the press release. My God.

“From the first moment she was thrust into the public eye, Bristol and her son have been the subjects of a huge amount of curiosity and misunderstanding. This show will reveal the real Bristol Palin and her journey as a daughter, a mother and a young woman making her way in the world.”

They kind of brush over the fact that the “misunderstanding” is that her sociopath mother preaches abstinence yet Bristol got knocked up when she was 16 because what the hell else are you gonna do in Alaska except shoot wolves and fight vampires? If her last name wasn’t Palin, Bristol would, at best, be trying to convince her boss to let her dance the main stage one night a week, but since her mother ruined any chance McCain had, she gets her own television show despite the fact that all she’s ever accomplished is managing to have a baby that wasn’t retarded. What up, Trig? What’s shakin, homey? Your brain? Cool, bro.

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Bristol Palin Is Expensive

Levi Johnston was some teenage loser who got drunk and knocked up Sarah Palin’s daughter, Bristol, then he parlayed that “fame” by posing nude and standing outside car dealerships. Bristol now wants all that money of course. TMZ reports:

Court documents were filed by Bristol’s lawyer late Thursday afternoon in Alaska, demanding $1,750 a month in child support from Levi, retroactive to the birth of son Tripp on December 27, 2008. According to the docs, obtained by TMZ, Bristol believes Levi has pulled in “in excess of $105,000 in 2009 through various media interviews and modeling related activities.” Bristol says in her sworn statement, “I have received limited and sporadic financial assistance from Levi.” Bristol says Levi has forked over only $4,400 over the 13 months of Tripp’s life — $3,000 on September 9, 2009, $1,400 on December 19. Bristol’s request is for temporary support, pending a permanent child support order. UPDATE: Levi Johnston’s manager, Tank Jones, tells TMZ Levi has paid Bristol more than $10,000 since Tripp was born. Jones also says Levi does not make money off of every interview he does, though he did not say exactly how much Levi has made.

$1,750 for one kid? I hate to break it to you ladies, but this how Lifetime movies get made. Here’s an idea, get a job. Just because you didn’t make this idiot pull out, doesn’t mean he has to live under a bridge so you can mark things off your Charlotte Russe wishlist. Besides, this kid is half Palin, there was a good chance he would have came out like Trig. What does he need two grand a month for? Just get him a tire swing or a cable run so he can have free access to the backyard. That seems like it would be fun and a bit more cost effective.

You can read the court docs HERE

Bristol’s mama in booty shorts:

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Levi Johnston Does Playgirl

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As threatened, VPCILF Sarah Palin’s daughter’s baby daddy, Levi Johnston, posed for Playgirl and here is the first image that has hit online. Details and Playgirl are basically gay porn now, so I hope he didn’t think that a million college girls and horny housewives would be sending him letters with perfume and wet panties. In a more realistic scenario, Leon at Jazzy Hair Designs will be unbuttoning his satin hot pants while he’s waiting for your mom’s color to set.

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