Lena Dunham Wants You To Know She Doesn’t Care What You Think About Her Body Again
Lena Dunham Wants You To Know She Doesn’t Care What You Think About Her Body Again

 

Hey, guys! Did you know Lena Dunham doesn’t care what you think about her body? You’ve probably heard that before. Here’s 282 more words about how she doesn’t care. Enjoy!

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Lena Dunham Said Donald Trump’s Victory Made Her Lose Weight
Lena Dunham Said Donald Trump’s Victory Made Her Lose Weight

 

Lena Dunham was onHoward Stern’s SiriusXM radio show on Monday and said Donald Trump becoming President made her lose weight. I’m not seeing it to be honest. Maybe when she poses in lingerie that’s 47 sizes too small for her on Instagram we’ll be able to tell.

“Donald Trump became president and I stopped being able to eat food,” she told Stern after he complimented her look. “Everyone’s been asking like, ‘What have you been doing?’ And I’m like, ‘Try soul-crushing pain and devastation and hopelessness and you, too, will lose weight.’”

Yes, there’s probably nothing more soul-crushing to a chick born in NYC to rich parents than a dude in a temp job who doesn’t agree with her politically. But, wait. There’s more!

“Here’s the funny thing. Of course, it’s a mistake, but we’re talking about him like he’s a person who is operating in a sane way, we’re talking about him like a person who doesn’t have a personality disorder,” she responded.

Read that again. Lena Dunham calling out someone for having a personality disorder. Lena Dunham. Lena Dunham who has tricked women into thinking her narcissism/self-importance/soft-racism combo with bacon cheese fries is feminism and progressive because she’s horrifically unattractive and voted for Hillary. Fuck off.  At least Donald Trump had a black person on his show.

 

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Lena Dunham Is Doing That “Real Woman” Shit Again, Everyone
Lena Dunham Is Doing That “Real Woman” Shit Again, Everyone

 

Let’s forget for a moment that the “standards of beauty” are literally different for every person on the planet, Lonely Lingerie has created oh Jesus I can’t finish this.

New Zealand underwear label Lonely Lingerie has launched a no-frills underwear campaign called ‘#LonelyGirlsProject’. It features real women photographed in casual settings–more often than not in their very own homes.

Pretty please, with sugar on top, can we stop with the “real women” bullshit? I was under the impression that the only criteria for being a real woman was having a vagina. Unless you mean that “real women” like to eat and not work out. What if I told you that Victoria’s Secret models weren’t androids created in a lab, but real women who also consume food and have vaginas. They also managed to win the genetic lottery? And what if I told you this doesn’t make them less realer than women who wear Spanx to hide their Type 2 Diabetes? Please get over it. You’re not helping anyone.

 

But here’s two rich white ladies in their apartment in Bedstuy. I’m sure all “real women” can relate:

 

An outtake of our Lonely Girls, Lena & Jemima Shot by @zaraeloise for #lonelygirlsproject

A photo posted by Lonely Lingerie (@lonelylingerie) on

Lena & Jemima for Lonely Girls ♡ Shot by @zaraeloise in NYC for #lonelygirlsproject

A photo posted by Lonely Lingerie (@lonelylingerie) on

 

And if your message and cause about celebrating “real women” diluted and never to be taking seriously again, ask Kylie Jenner to be involved because you need Instagram likes. Great work.

 

@kyliejenner in her Lexi Underwire. #LonelyLingerie

A photo posted by Lonely Lingerie (@lonelylingerie) on

 

Since we’re on the topic of Lena Dunham and lies, she’s on the cover of Nylon. They call her a “feminist powerhouse”. Of course I expect to read shit like this on Friday the 13th:

 

Our February cover is here! And we’re thrilled to have feminist powerhouse and queen of controversy @lenadunham gracing it We met up with Dunham in L.A. and talked about the emotional rollercoaster that is the final season of ‘Girls,’ self-awareness, our current political climate, and more // Click the link in our bio for our full interview with Dunham, and grab a copy of our February issue on newsstands 1/17! photographer: @sofiaandmauro // photo assistants: Leon Singleton & @seancostellophoto // stylist: @sallylyndley // stylist’s assistants: Nicola Rowlands & @hntrwdrff // hair: @marcusrfrancis at @starworksartists // makeup: @fabiolamakeup at @traceymattinglyllc // manicurist: @kaitmosh at @cloutierremix // set design: Jamie Dean at @walterschupfermanagement

A photo posted by Nylon Magazine (@nylonmag) on

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Lena Dunham Is Glamorous

Sorry if you’re eating, but here’s Lena Dunham walking around NYC yesterday (probably not going to Taylor Swift’s house) looking as gorgeous as ever. I’m sorry if you can’t handle all this beauty this morning, and I can’t even believe Odell Beckham, Jr. didn’t want to hit this when he had the chance. Probably something to do with the patriarchy, I bet.

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Lena Dunham Thinks Sushi On Campus Is Cultural Appropriation Now
Lena Dunham Thinks Sushi On Campus Is Cultural Appropriation Now


Lena Dunham, who probably has a specific alarm on her phone for Taco Tuesdays, thinks college dining hall sushi is cultural appropriation because neoliberal millennials can’t wait to curb stomp you with their Chuck Taylor jackboots of fascism if you don’t cater to their every need while they’re Googling “who is Jill Stein?”.

There are now big conversations at Oberlin, where I went to college, about cultural appropriation and whether the dining hall sushi and banh mi disrespect certain cuisines. 
The press reported it as, “How crazy are Oberlin kids?” But to me, it was actually, “Right on.”

Oberlin. Do I really need to say anything here? Apparently I should, because bandwith was used to write this article in The Oberlin Review

Diep Nguyen, a College first-year from Vietnam, jumped with excitement at the sight of Vietnamese food on Stevenson Dining Hall’s menu at Orientation this year. Craving Vietnamese comfort food, Nguyen rushed to the food station with high hopes. What she got, however, was a total disappointment. “It was ridiculous,” Nguyen said. “How could they just throw out something completely different and label it as another country’s traditional food?”

Good lord. Just shut the fuck up. You know why it’s completely different? Because you’re in a fucking college dining hall not New York Restaurant Week. Like, if I want fried chicken, I go to Popeye’s. If I want real fried chicken, I go to my mama’s house. Jiro ain’t dreaming of making sushi for a cafeteria. Suck it the fuck up. 

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Lena Dunham Needs A Safe Space After Kanye West’s ‘Famous’ Video
Lena Dunham Needs A Safe Space After Kanye West’s ‘Famous’ Video


Hey, remember when Lena Dunham heard Justin Bieber’s “What Do You Mean?” once and immediately thought it was about date rape? That was fun. Get ready for some more fun, because she’s now using her tenth wave feminism degree from Tumblr to write about dissertation the dangers of the “disturbing”  Kanye West “Famous” video.  Man, Taylor Swift must pay by the word. 


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Lena Dunham Is On The Kesha Case
Lena Dunham Is On The Kesha Case


I’m not going to tell you what’s going with the whole Dr. Luke/Kesha thing because you already now, and if you don’t, go find out and come back. Hurry up, we’re waiting. Back? Ok. Go take a pee break, this is pretty long.

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Happy 2016, Lena Dunham
 

A photo posted by Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) on

 

Not her natural habitat but she’s trying her darnedest!!!

A photo posted by Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) on




Presented without comment. I assume it’s hard to read and vomit at the same time.

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Lena Dunham Is Your #WCE
 

A video posted by Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) on



Not sure if you’re ready for a sexy Lena Dunham dance that’s probably an indictment of the patriarchy or bathing suit inequality or whatever Salon decides to read into this, but you can’t deny the sheer animal magnetism that’s being displayed here. The animal magnetism in the sense that animals are magnets for food. I want to apologize if you’re at work right now and your penis detached from your body. Not sure what the workplace policy is on that.


Wash your eyes out:


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Lena Dunham Got Topless For Bazaar
Lena Dunham Got Topless For Bazaar


Lena Dunham did an interview with Harper’s Bazaar then got topless for the shoot an…oh god I can’t so this…gonna vomgimme a minute


 Whew. Ok, that passed. My apologies. Here’s Sophie Turner.


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