Keira Knightley Had A Kid

I guess it was only a matter of time before someone had sex with Keira Knightley and didn’t pull out and put a baby up in there.

Keira Knightley is a mom! The Imitation Game actress and her husband, musician James Righton, welcomed their first child, multiple sources confirm to PEOPLE. Although PEOPLE confirmed her pregnancy in December, the mom-to-be, 30, kept mum on the news, and let her baby belly speak for itself in the weeks leading up to award season.

We don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl or a dragon yet, or if the baby has regular human hands or whatever, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. Her husband’s headstone will still say “Got Keira Knightley Pregnant”.

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Keira Knightley Went Topless For Interview

Hey, remember about four years ago when I was completely obsessed with Keira Knightley and I’d post about her like everyday? You do? Cool. You don’t? Cool. Anyway, she posed topless for Interview with one caveat: they didn’t retouch or make her boobs bigger than they are.  (via Daily Mail)

‘I’ve had my body manipulated so many different times for so many different reasons, whether it’s paparazzi photographers or for film posters.’…’That [shoot] was one of the ones where I said: “OK, I’m fine doing the topless shot so long as you don’t make them any bigger or retouch.” Because it does feel important to say it really doesn’t matter what shape you are.‘ 

Yeah, so there’s not really much you can say to that. Tits or not, Keira Knightley is sexy fuck and doesn’t really care if you think so or not. (Hint: that makes her more sexy). You can see the NSFW pic here, and if you think her boobs look uneven, congrats! You’ve just seen your first pair! Somebody needs to get you “I Just Saw My First Real Boobs” sticker and maybe a lollipop. So proud of you! So proud.





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Keira Knightley Will Always Go Topless Forever

Besides being topless in the December 2012 issue of Allure Keira Knightley says she has no problems doing topless scenes because she boobs are so small. Also, I love her.

“I’m quite rigorous about what gets exposed,” the British beauty says of appearing nude on film. “No bottom half! I don’t mind exposing my t-ts because they’re so small — people really aren’t that interested.

If you don’t think Keira Knightley is hot, I dare to sit through Domino without making her a mixtape. I’ll win, because you can’t. Ask any scientists, its impossible.

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Every Actress In Hollywood Wants To Be In ‘The Dark Knight Rises’

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Having already cast Tom Hardy (in the possible role of the psychotic villain Hugo Strange), Christopher Nolan is looking for two actresses to fill two crucial roles in the upcoming blockbuster nerdgasm, The Dark Knight Rises. And everyone wants in. THR reports:

Christopher Nolan is looking at some of Hollywood’s leading actresses — as well as a few emerging talents — for major female roles in The Dark Knight Rises, his next Batman film. Sources tell Heat Vision that Keira Knightley, Anne Hathaway and Jessica Biel (pictured, top left) are due to test for roles in the Warner Bros. superhero tentpole in the next two weeks. Also testing are relative newcomers Kate Mara (top right) and Charlotte Riley (bottom left). Hot British actress Gemma Arterton (bottom right) has also scheduled to test but, as Heat Vision first reported last week, Arterton just landed the female lead in Paramount’s Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters and might now have scheduling issues. Dark Knight Rises needs to fill two big female roles, a villain and a love interest. Sources say one character is Talia, the daughter of villain Ra’s Al Ghul, who was portrayed by Liam Neeson in Nolan’s first Gotham-set crime pic Batman Begins. In the comic books, Talia is both Batman’s lover and antagonist, ultimately siring his alter ego Bruce Wayne’s son.

The glaring flaw in The Dark Knight was the casting of Admiral Akbar Maggie Gyllenhaal. Were they trying to tell me that Bruce Wayne was gay? Was he blind in one eye? I mean, that can be the only way to explain why a billionaire playboy who spends his nights fighting crime would be willing to give up everything for a chick who looks like her face is upside down. It’s things like that makes America hated around the world. You think if Bruce Wayne was born in Saudi Arabia he’d be jerking off in his sashimi over some chick with undiagnosed Downs Syndrome? No. He’d be waking up at noon puking blood on top of two 18-year old twins from Kansas who may or not be fisting each other.

Kate Mara is the hottest redhead in Hollywood, so she gets my vote. My penis also wanted me to bring up her threesome with Sophia Bush on Nip/Tuck as a possible deciding factor. Wow, I didn’t even think of that! My penis is so smart! Look at him go!

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Keira Knightley Was Robbed

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The flat of actress Keira Knightley was burglarized last week when thieves apparently late for a LAN party saw an opportunity. Mirror UK reports:

The thieves made off with two laptop computers after entering the Pirates Of The Caribbean star’s flat in central London. Knightley, 25, is thought to share the flat with her brother. She was not inside the property at the time. The burglary took place on October 26. It is believed that two other properties in the block of flats where she lives have also been targeted. A Metropolitan Police spokesman said: “Officers from Westminster are investigating a residential burglary at a flat. “It is believed to have occurred between 09:00 and 21:00 on 26 October 2010.”

It is also believed that I saw a spider last night then screamed and jumped on the couch, but that’s just mudslinging on the part of my opponent. The spider and I were playing hide and seek, you see.

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Links Less Creepy Than A Keira Knightley PSA

This is where I contemplated making a joke about domestic violence.

And here’s where I change the subject with some Scarlett Johansson trying to sell you booze while looking hot ads. [HuffPo]

Miley Cyrus‘ grandma is really rocking whatever look she’s got going on there. Site NSFW. [DrunkenStepfather]

Reasons not to call 911: Because you’re locked in your car. Because you don’t know how to open things like car doors. [EbaumNation]

Yesterday a necklace, today Miriah Carey is gonna show us her nipple. [CityRag]

Kristen Stewart is scared of Twilight fans, which means we have at least one thing in common. [ICYDK]

I’m not super-super interested in an Helena Bonham Carter upskirt. But different strokes and all. Site NSFW [TaxiDriverMovie] (more…)

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POTC3 Kicked Ass

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End broke the Memorial Day weekend opening record as it raked in $139.8 million in 4 days. As of today, the $300 million film has grossed $411 million worldwide. However, it is expected to fare far worse than it’s predecessor, POTC: Dead Man’s Chest, which grossed over $1 billion during it’s theatrical run. Chris LeRoy, Buena Vista’s senior vice president general sales manager attempts to sound disappointed:

I think it was hard to expect it to top No. 2 [Dead Man’s Chest]. Market conditions change so much from one movie to the other. What we wanted to accomplish was to break the Memorial Day weekend record and we’re very pleased with that. Spider-Man 3 had a wide open playing field and, though the market expanded to a spectacular degree [this weekend], there was just more competition. I don’t like to put too much emphasis on what the opening weekend means.”

The POTC trilogy has earned over $2 billion at the box office, so good luck trying to make me feel sorry for you there, buddy. I bet you can only just barely enjoy aiming for those bikini models’ mouths in your Hollywood mansion. Speaking of which, do you know if Keira Knightley got any of my voicemails? I’ve been out of town and my phone was turned off so…


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