Here’s Some More People At The Grammys

Hey, look! Here’s some people who also attended the Grammys last night. You might know some of these people, or you might now. My only real criteria for choosing these pictures was “titties”. I know 2014 was about the ass and all that, but I’m in Atlanta so I see enough of that.

Related Posts:

Tags: , , , , ,
Aww, Katy Perry Thinks We Watched The Super Bowl For Her
Aww, Katy Perry Thinks We Watched The Super Bowl For Her

 

If you watched the Super Bowl just to watch Katy Perry‘s performance, raise your hand. Now put it down really quick because your 7th grade math teacher might think you know the answer. We both know you don’t. Your last pop quiz wasn’t on fleek, dummy.

 

Related Posts:

Tags:
The More You Know

Christ. Like I don’t even know where to start. As expected, Katy Perry had no business performing at the Super Bowl halftime show. I was just a bunch of bright, shiny things to distract you from the fact that lip-synching chick with the weave is a mediocre talent with a big rack who sells a lot of albums because America is mostly dumb. Lenny Kravitz was probably on beach right at dawn scrubbing his soul with a rock, but at least Katy Perry was just an opening act for Missy Elliot. I would say the halftime show was as depressing as the commercials, but you can’t really compete with amputees and dead kids if you’re trying to depress someone. I was seriously waiting for a Wendy’s commercial where they shot a puppy in the head and euthanized a homeless man to promote their new Frosty campaign.

 

Check out the whole performance after the jump. I like the part where Katy Perry tries to learn Missy Elliot’s dance routine on the stage.

 

(more…)

Related Posts:

Tags: , , ,
They’re Serious About This Katy Perry Superbowl Thing

I thought somebody at the NFL would realize they said “Katy Perry” when they announced the halftime show performer then issue a written apology, but it looks like we’re stuck with listening to a prerecorded track filled with lyrics that make you dumb (seriously, her lyrics are fucking dumb) while you’re packing your bowl for the 3rd quarter. So here she is at the Pepsi Super Bowl XLIX Halftime Show press conference. She confirmed she hates Taylor Swift and said she wants her halftime performance to be “quintessential Katy”, whatever the fuck that means. Hoping we stare at her rack long enough so we notice her glass eye? I guess it’s worked so far.

Related Posts:

Tags:
Katy Perry Went To Something

Katy Perry is dating a dude who tweets like a teenage girl saying Taylor Swift doesn’t have an ass, even though Katy Perry’s thighs look  like she recorded her last album in Dunkin Donuts, but she attended the 28th Annual ARIA Awards last night in this dress that put a black mesh thing over her thighs and covered up her only redeeming quality (her rack), so you’re just left to look at her big ass forehead and lazy eye. Pretty sexy stuff, bro.

Related Posts:

Tags:
Diplo Seems Pretty Mature
Diplo Seems Pretty Mature

 

Since Katy Perry‘s tits have infected his brain, Diplo started some shit with her sworn enemy, Taylor Swift, over Twitter then got smacked down by Lorde. That really should have been the end of it, but I guess Katy Perry told him he had to keep it going if he wanted to titty fuck her again, so her posted this pic on Instagram with the caption MY DICK GETS MORE HITS THEN TAYLOR SWIFT. All these chicks in this picture look like they were freed from a cargo tanker by the Coast Guard, yet he wants to make fun of Taylor Swift’s ass. I don’t know, it looks pretty lickable to me. I guess it’s just kinda hard to figure out who the girl is in this whole scenario.

Related Posts:

Tags: , , ,
Katy Perry Dressed Up Like A Cheeto

Katy Perry dresses up like normal girls dress up for Halloween everyday, so instead of her rack and ass hanging out, she decided to dress up like one of America’s culinary favorites: Enriched corn meal, ferrous sulfate, niacin, thiamin mononitrate, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, lactic acid, and artificially colors (including yellow 6). I’d lick my fingers after eating this, too. Heeyyoooo!

Related Posts:

Tags:
Katy Perry Is Your Super Bowl Halftime Person Maybe
Katy Perry Is Your Super Bowl Halftime Person Maybe

 

The Super Bowl is usually the most boring game of the NFL season, so who better to ensure it stays boring than Katy Perry? She’s an auto-tuned pair of tits who rhymes “Mariah Carey” with “Japanese-y”. Fun for the whole family.

There are unconfirmed reports claiming Perry is set to star in the Super Bowl XLIX halftime show next February, beating out Coldplay and Rihanna for the gig. While it remains to be seen whether the pop star will take over sports’ biggest stage, there is no question that Katy Perry is perfect for the Super Bowl.

Roger Goodell has made it clear that anybody on the field can punch Katy Perry at least once without a lifetime ban, so hopefully they’ll use the opportunity to take one for the humanity team. I mean, they’re already at the Super Bowl, and teams usually don’t make it back the next year, so go ahead and serve that suspension when you know you won’t make the playoffs anyway. This, of course, doesn’t apply to Dallas Cowboys’ players, because it’s pretty hard to punch someone through your television. I mean, you could, but it would take a better understanding of physics and time travel. It’s pretty complicated stuff.

Related Posts:

Tags:
Katy Perry Chugs A Beer, Dives Off A Table
Katy Perry Chugs A Beer, Dives Off A Table

 

Katy Perry abandoned Christ for fortune and fame, and she kinda has a weird eye, but Satan has turned into some kind of football oracle, because she went on ESPN’s College Gameday on Saturday and predicted Ole Miss would upset #2 Alabama. And they did. The only thing I really know about Ole Miss is that it’s where people who own Taco Bells send their adopted black kids, so this should make a better recruiting video.

 

 

 

Related Posts:

Tags:
Katy Perry Has Red Hair Now
Katy Perry Has Red Hair Now

 

Haven’t kept up, but I think Katy Perry might have just went through another breakup, because she just dyed her hair red and is comparing herself to a muppet. Man, it’s really hard to figure out why dudes always leave her. She seems really down to earth and perfectly mentally stable.

Related Posts:

Tags: