The Jennifer Lawrence And Kate Upton Naked Pics Will Be In An Art Exhibit
The Jennifer Lawrence And Kate Upton Naked Pics Will Be In An Art Exhibit

 

You can pretty much get away with anything if you call it “art”. Like Miley Cyrus songs and Terry Richardson sexual assault or putting hacked naked photos on some canvas then serving wine and cheese to people who want to see Jennifer Lawrence’s tits ironically.

Following the hacking scandal seen ’round the world, LA artist XVALA has decided to display the leaked photos of Jennifer Lawrence and Kate Upton in his “No Delete” art show coming in October. The photos will be on printed on canvas, and will be life-sized and completely unaltered. On Sept. 3, Cory Allen Contemporary Art (CACA) announced in a press release that JLaw and Kate’s pics will be the latest addition to XVALA’s “Fear Google” Campaign. The art show, titled “No Delete” displays the 7-year collection of celebrity pics that XVALA has found on Google “in their most vulnerable and private moments, that were comprised by either hackers or the paparazzi.”

Wait, Kate Upton’s rack is gonna be printed on a huge canvas and completely unaltered? How much are tickets to this thing? Are they available on Ticketmaster and can I bring my own beer? You don’t want me drinking wine around those.

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Kate Upton Won’t Get Naked Because Of The Internet
Kate Upton Won’t Get Naked Because Of The Internet

 

If you’re holding your breath waiting for Kate Upton to get completely naked, sorry. She’s not.  It’s all your fault.

For me those photos are art. Your body is art, your body is beautiful, and to be photographed in that way is amazing and it’s received in a very positive way. But with social media and the Internet and not so great blogs and the attention like that, I don’t think that my pictures would be received in the way that I’d want them to be received. That’s why I’ve stayed away from them. I really appreciate those photos and I think those women are beautiful, but I think social media and the Internet has prevented me from putting myself out there like that.

Not sure I get this logic, because haven’t we basically seen everything Kate is working with already? Boobs. She’s working with boobs. That’s pretty much it. Take away those, and she’s a bartender in Daytona. No hips, legs look like they’ve atrophied, and the stomach is first cousins with Tara Reid. Unless her bikinis and bras require some sort of anti-gravity device and her vagina doesn’t have tentacles, I don’t think the Internet is gonna care too much.

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Kate Upton Is “Topless”
Kate Upton Is “Topless”

 

This picture of Kate Upton covered in a sheet was everywhere yesterday with the headline, "Kate Upton is topless!". The click bait struggle is real. If this was on Facebook, they probably would have changed it to, "Kate Upton took a picture on Instagram and you WON'T BELIEVE what happened next!!!"

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Kate Upton Is 22
Kate Upton Is 22

 

Kate Upton has been around for so long that when I found out today was her birthday, my first guess was "wow she has fantastic boobs how can I lick them". Then I forgot the original question. Anyway, she's 22 and here's her first shot when she signed with IMG. They probably left her face in just to be nice.

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Please Pay Attention To Kate Upton’s Butt

 

It's unclear why Kate Upton would want anyone to focus on anything other than her massive, legendary rack, but in this Sports Illustrated behind the scenes video (I see what they did there), Kate Upton really thinks her butt doesn't get enough attention. And really, why should it? It doesn't even bounce or need elements not found on this planet to hold it in place. What message is she sending to young girls with this video? Pretty irresponsible if you ask me.

 

This is a Kate Upton post, so this video is automatically included:

 

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Kate Upton Did Vogue UK
Kate Upton Did Vogue UK

 

Kate Upton has kinda fallen off the map recently, mostly because she's been so overexposed she probably has radiation poisoning and we've all had three years to see that she has other things than huge rack. And most of those things aren't necessarily greatest. But did I mention she has a huge rack? Dude, just focus on the positive. Why you gotta be so negative all the time? What's wrong with you?

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Kate Upton Remembered Why She’s Famous
Kate Upton Remembered Why She’s Famous

 

Earlier this week, Kate Upton said she wished she had smaller boobs. Then I guess somebody pulled her to the side and told her that if she didn't have a gigantic rack that she'd be a club hostess and doing used car dealership commercials. She loves her boobs now.

Speaking with Australian radio show 2Day FM, the 21-year-old clears the air about any rumors of an upcoming breast reduction. "I actually didn't ever say that. Yeah, no, I never said that," Upton says. "It's my body I'll tell you how I feel about it." "I would say that I think all women feel sometimes they don't have life perfect, sometimes they don't feel their best," the buxom blonde explains. "But I love my body. I always feel incredibly grateful for what I have, but there's times when all women don't feel their best."

Kate Upton is kinda like a paraplegic, because everything from the chest down looks like it hasn't been worked out in a while. If you can manage not to look at her stomach, ass, and legs, then her boobs will take you on a magic journey of wonder and magic. Like in the Bible when Jesus got sick air on that jet ski.

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Kate Upton Wants Smaller Boobs. Lies.
Kate Upton Wants Smaller Boobs. Lies.

 

This is like Beyonce saying she wants her legs amputated. You see what I'm saying here? It just…makes no sense.

The grass is always greener. Kate Upton, the world-famous supermodel who's well-known for her voluptuous assets, said in a recent interview that she wishes her breasts were smaller. "I wish I had smaller boobs every day of my life as I would love to wear spaghetti tops braless or go for the smallest bikini designs," the buxom blonde bombshell, 21, told British publication The Sun on Sunday, April 13. "Every single day I'm like, 'Oh man, it would be so much easier,' especially if people didn't constantly bring them up," the Vogue cover girl added. "If I could just take them off like they were clip-ons…" The two-time consecutive Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover model continued to express her dismay over her busty body. "I know I say I wish I had smaller boobs," she shared, "and that's true because at least twice a day I wish that.

Women logic, brah. If they have big boobs, they want smaller boobs. If they have small boobs, they want implants. If they have straight hair, they want curly hair. If they have curly hair, they get it straightened. If they have a big ass, they want a smaller one. If they say everything is fine, everything is not fine. Women, I love you, I do, I really do, but you guys always know exactly what you want. The problem is, you have no idea what that is. Unless it's wine or tequila. Always wine and tequila. But, like, if Kate Upton wants to go braless, then what's stopping her? Just unhook it. I can do it with both hands in like ten minutes. Not to brag, but I'm pretty good at it.

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‘The Other Woman’ Had A Premiere

Despite looking like she was cursed by a warlock some time around 2002, Cameron Diaz is still being cast in romantic comedies. But now Hollywood has to cast hot chicks in her movies with her because, well, look at the banner picture. Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann are just happy to be here at this point. The film's script was rewritten and the title was changed to The Other Woman after the studio found out it was just Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann in the movie. "Wait, do what now? Nope." a studio executive said.

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