Mark Wahlberg is a notorious jackass, so of course he couldn’t help himself when he was asked about Kate Moss and their famous 1992 Calvin Klein ads in an interview with Nuts Magazine. The Sun reports:
“It was OK. I wasn’t into the waif thing. She [Kate Moss] kind of looked like my nephew. I mean she’s beautiful – she’s a very pretty nephew – but I’m more into curvy women.”
It’s hard not to argue with Mark Wahlberg, I guess. Especially since Kate Moss looks like she should be dancing on a table with a top hat and umbrella explaining to Pinocchio about a good conscience.
Not looking a nephew, here’s Lucy Pinder in this week’s issue of Nuts Magazine. Ta-dow! NSFW:
The good thing about being Kate Moss is that for Halloween, you really don’t have to waste a lot of money on a costume. You can just go as yourself. Like she did at LAX yesterday. Jesus. This is a model? If I saw this in the airport I wouldn’t want to take its picture, I’d want to find it’s hive and kill its queen.
The world’s unlikeliest supermodel left the The Ivy in London a couple weeks ago in a see through dress. Wow, exciting. Kate Moss’ nipples. One time a stray dog had some puppies in the woods behind my house. This kinda reminds me of that.
Who in the hell knows why anybody would want to buy this, but here is a gold statue of Kate Moss. It was created by artist(?) Marc Quinn and is reportedly valued at $3 million. Anybody who buys this should take some of their money and throw it over a forest fire or give it to an Ethiopian prince, because it’s obvious they have way too much.
Every fucking celebrity is in Spain right now (I’m looking at you Al Qaeda), so of course Kate Moss is there and of course she’s almost naked. I don’t know how in the hell this chick managed to trick the world into thinking she’s a supermodel, because really, I’ve seen better bodies in paragraphs. Sure, she may be the hottest thing in Zombie Apocalypse Monthly, but as for me and my penis, we shall serve Megan Fox.
No, these pictures weren’t taken outside Hitler’s bunker, this is Kate Moss (and her friend) topless on a yacht in Italy. I don’t know what these do for you, but if you’re a dude and you think she’s hot, I’m sorry. I’m sorry about that bad thing that happened to you in your childhood. But don’t live in shame anymore, dear friend. Break the silence!
If you’re a white woman and you’re going to country that’s 94% Muslim, like Turkey, it’s always a good idea to wear a see through dress, a thong, and no bra. Muslim men love that. They throw acid in your face or perform your honor killing only if you don’t show off that sexy body! So, go Kate! Work it girl!
I love London. It’s a magical place filled with extra “u”s in words and drunk whores. The Daily Mail reports:
One is a millionaire model. The other the daughter of rock royalty. But last night, Kate Moss and Kelly Osbourne turned 3am party girls to pair up for a wild night out in London, leaving both clearly the worse for wear as they partied until the early hours of this morning. Kate leant heavily on boyfriend Jamie Hince, as she and Kelly left club Punk in Soho last night. The 34-year-old model, and mother of daughter Lila Grace, 5, exited the club unsteadily with her head hanging down, wearing black shorts and a leather jacket, and opaque tights which appeared to have stains on them. While a dramatically pale Kelly, the daughter of rocker Ozzy Osbourne and X Factor judge Sharon, clearly needed the support of two pals as she made her way out to the waiting car.”
Man, this club must be hot. I imagine people fall over themselves to party with a washed up model and her fat drunk friend. I know I would. This is exactly like the clubs in L.A. except with way more BMI and resistance to sunlight.
I reached for my pink Post-it notes to no avail. I checked the usual places … the trash, Sherry’s cubicle, Fred’s fanny pack, Brad’s boxer briefs, still no pink Post-its. Alas, there were Jack and Dave shooting spitballs at each other in the conference room as a topless Kate Moss stood between them blocking the shots. According to these pictures, Kate was hit at least twice. She’s a real trooper.