Kanye West is finally sitting down for his deposition for that time he beat up a photographer, and as expected, West defies the laws of physics by sticking a head that large up his own ass. We’ll get to the rest of it, but first, Kanye had to take a selfie.
Kanye West swears under oath, “I’m the smartest celebrity you’ve ever f***ing dealt with. I’m not Britney Spears.”
I think anyone’s intelligence is up for debate when they marry Kim Kardashian, but again, we’re dealing with Kanye West.
Kanye explains to Nate Goldberg, the photog’s lawyer, “I’m in the business of trying to make dope s**t for the world. You’re in the business of representing scums and trying to make as much money as long as there’s this lapse in the law.” Goldberg grills Kanye about his song, “Flashing Lights,” — a rant against the paparazzi. Goldberg quotes from the song, “Till I get flashed by the paparazzi, damn, these ni**as got me.” At that point Kanye interrupts, “You have to ask for a hall pass. You can’t just say the ‘n’ word around me.” adding, “It offends me because you’re a white person saying ‘ni**a.'” Kanye says there’s a parallel between blacks fighting for civil rights in the ’60s and celebs fighting for theirs today: “I mean in the ’60s people used to hold up ‘Die N****r’ signs when my parents were in the sit-ins also.” Goldberg asks if he equates the struggle of blacks in the past with celebrities today and Kanye says, “Yes, 100 … I equate it to discrimination. I equate it to inequalities.” Kanye goes on, “We, as group of minorities here in L.A., as celebrities have to ban together to influence guys like this — guys trying to take the picture, guys trying to get the big win, guys trying to get the check.” The depo is riddled with Kanye’s sarcasm. When Goldberg asks where he lives, Kanye replies, “Earth.”
I hope I’m not the only one to point this out, but does anyone else see the disconnect between Kanye not wanting a white man to say “nigger” in his presence, then comparing getting his picture taken to the civil rights movement? First, you sound dumb, and second, you cheapen the people who you pretend to honor. Also, you can’t get mad when a white man says the word “nigger” in front of you when you threw a hissy fit when Nike didn’t make you theirs. Also keep in mind that your wife’s life force is replenished every time a photog takes her picture, so she’d probably do a sit-in with you as soon as her mom clears it with Getty Images.