Last week, Jimmy Fallon chipped a tooth trying to open medication. Two months, an episode of the Tonight Show was cancelled after he fell in his apartment and spent 10 days in ICU where he required surgery on his hand. The NYPD won’t release the 911 calls.
What's the best way to start your Wednesday besides having morning sex? Listening to Samuel L. Jackson perform a slam poetry reading about Boy Meets World, of course. Play it while you're having sex. Best of both worlds, man.
Whenever Justin Timberlake and Jimmy Fallon get together its always a good time, so naturally when they performed The History Of Rap 5, they crushed it. Although, they performed a few songs that weren't actually rap songs. Did you notice that? You did? Why do always have to find the negative in everything? What's your problem, man? Gawd.
Kate Upton was on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, where instead of asking her to remove her clothes and remain perfect silent, Fallon asked her to play flip cup then let her win, because we are taught at a young age to let pretty girls win things. It plays into their need for self-empowerment and increases your chances to get laid. It's really a win/win. Anyway, I realize this probably isn't news, so you can send me a strongly worded email telling me that only after you watch the video below. Did you watch? We're friends again now, right?
I have no idea what this is supposed to be, but Lindsay Lohan appeared on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon to do….uhhh….this thing. I assume this show is a big hit in Colorado.
Questlove, drummer for the Grammy Award-winning band The Roots, which is now the in-house band for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, always manages to find the perfect intro song for every guest on the show. So naturally, he picked Fishbone’s 1985 “Lyin’ Ass Bitch” when
raving lunaticPresidential hopeful Michelle Bachmann made an appearance Monday night. That apparently hurt her feelings. Then Jimmy Fallon got on his knees in front of Michelle Bachmann and NBC. Radar Online reports:
Late night funnyman Jimmy Fallon apologized Tuesday to Rep. Michele Bachmann after his band serenaded her with Fishbone’s 1985 track “Lyin’ A** B****” in her appearance on the show Monday. “I’m honored that @michelebachmann was on our show yesterday and I’m so sorry about the intro mess,” he tweeted. “I really hope she comes back.”
But don’t worry, guys. It was the black guy’s fault.
Fallon was unaware the band would be playing the track; bandleader/drummer Ahmir “Questlove” Thompson summed up his song selection about the Republican presidential hopeful as “a tongue-in-cheek and spur of the moment decision. “The show was not aware of it and I feel bad if her feelings were hurt,” Questlove, a noted supporter of Pres. Barack Obama, said in a statement. “That was not my intention.” Fallon later tweeted “@Questlove is grounded.”
Whatever. Fuck her. She has no business being a candidate for anything except euthanasia. I’m not going to sit here and say Jimmy Fallon didn’t know about the song choice ahead of time, but he probably knew about the song choice ahead of time and was perfectly okay with it. Since, you know, it’s his show and all. But since Michelle Bachmann threw a hissy fit, he had to give her a handjob and publicly chastise one of the main reasons people watch his lame show in the first place. I guess what I’m trying to say here is that Jimmy Fallon is a pussy and apparently there’s not any actual jokes in this post. I mean, except for Michelle Bachmann, but that doesn’t really count I guess.