The 2016 LOVE Advent Calendar started on December 1st. Do the math. There’s six videos below.
Selena Gomez in a bikini. Meh. The Superficial
Courtney Stodden is topless at the beach (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather
Kate Moss forgot her bra (NSFW) Taxi Driver Movie
ESPN’s Britt McHenry got suspended for being a basic bitch Dlisted
Farrah Abraham’s sideboob is sad Hollywood Tuna
Olivia Wilde is a hipster Popoholic
Robin Holzken GOOD LAWD Celebslam
This is what Miley Cyrus wears on a hike Moe Jackson
Ireland Baldwin did a shoot and interview with Galore that's let's all you lovely ladies know how you can look like this in a bikini. Not sure why you would.
"My diet consisted of Cup of Noodles and bagels, so I needed the yoga pants to hold it all together. When I stepped into this world and truly got a feeling for what it's all about, I literally said to myself, "oh s—t." Now the IMG model and Vanity Fair "It Girl" knows how to get her body bikini-ready on the regular. "The only way to feel good in a bikini is to treat your body right. Eat clean. Train. Stretch. Tone. Wear a bikini that suits your body type. Get your cheeks sandy. It's cute. Do squats. Take it low, take it way lower then that. Ha," the 6 ft. 2 inch model laughed.
Did she know what picture they were going to use before she gave that quote? I mean, because if you're advice is to "eat clean" and "do squats", it might carry more weight if you, you know, looked like you actually did those thing. I don't know how much lower she can go, but maybe she should make her squat stance a litte wider. Like maybe straddle a volcano.
Since she couldn't bring herself to write "Ireland Trout" at the DMV, Ireland Baldwin split from her boyfriend, Slater Trout. Read that name again. Damn, bro. Sources say Woody Allen got excited for a second then realized she was legal. Sad times.
E! News has exclusively learned from the 18-year-old beauty herself that she is no longer in a relationship with her surfing beau. So what was the main cause for the breakup? "I am focusing on work and school now," she explained when asked how the big decision came about. The two began dating back in 2013 and had been very public about their affection for one another on their social media accounts in the past. Last May, the model gushed about Trout to People magazine, explaining, "I would say he is my best friend. We have our moments but that's rare. We can act stupid in public, private or wherever and we are always laughing."
I chose not to use her face as a banner pic, because sometimes she looks hot and sometimes she looks like she pees standing up when nobody is watching. So, here's a pic of her ass instead. Not much really going on there either. I really didn't have too many options as you can clearly see.
pic source = Asstagram
Depending on the day, Ireland Baldwin looks hot or looks like she pees standing up, so it's good she recognized this and just straight up posted a pic of her ass on Instagram. Thank you, Alec Baldwin. That voicemail you left that one time is really starting to pay off.
pic source = Instagram
Ireland Baldwin hasn't gotten as famous as she would like yet, so what better way than to pretend you're talking about makeup while posing topless on Instagram? Guess what will happen? I'll post it. This site is read by billions of people worldwide and has received many prestigious and sought after journalism awards, so this post I'm writing in my underwear will probably have her internationally more famous than Lebron James before the day is over. Maybe even less, because so many A-list celebrities and leading professionals in their field read this site daily. Last year, Robert Downey, Jr. was asked his thougts on the site and he replied, "I…don't…I don't…in that way…wait, could you repeat that? Is this like one of those Tumblr things or something?".
pic source = Instagram
Besides having a stupid, douchey name, Ireland Baldwin's boyfriend, Slater Trout, is a surfer or something. And since he can't twerk in a bikini to sell his t-shirts, he has to get Ireland to put on the shirt and some panties to make you buy something that says, "Slater Trout Is My Homeboy" on it. There's no fine print, but I should let you know that if you buy the t-shirt, Ireland Baldwin in panties doesn't come included in the free shipping. I just want to make sure you know that after you buy this, you'll be walking around in a t-shirt that says, "Slater Trout Is My Homeboy" on it. I just really want to drive that point home to you.
pic source = Instagram
MSNBC decided to give Alec Baldwin his own talk show, Up Late With Alec Baldwin, but when you hire an unhinged maniac with severe anger issues, you might find yourself suspending the show because your host on your liberal network got caught on camera calling someone a "cocksucking fag". Then his daughter, Ireland Baldwin, who he called "a thougthless little pig" when she was 11, takes her undiagnosed Stockholm Syndrome to Twitter to defend her dad because the only reason he called a stranger a cocksucking fag was because of the children. E! Online reports:
"Sometimes we let our tempers get the best of us,"…"Tempers are like wildfires. Something or someone can easily fuel the fire…It takes a lot of strength for someone to release their anger...It takes a lot of strength and SUPPORT for someone to grow and become a better person. We all say things we don't mean. We all say things we can't take back….For someone who has battled with anger management issues, my dad has grown tremendously"…."My dad is far from a homophobe or a racist…From what you've read and from what media has been shoved down your throats, he has a kind heart," she continued on the social networking site….My point being, what my dad said was WRONG. What my dad felt WASN'T. My dad has an INFANT CHILD to protect. All the parents out there should understand. You would do anything to protect your baby…Now, let's all quit acting like children. Let my dad be and let him have his room to learn and enjoy his family."
So you want to "let's all stop acting like children"? You mean we should stop acting like your dad? I know you're 18, but adults have the ability to control their emotions. If your dad really wants to protect the INFANT CHILD, maybe he should teach her not to scream "cocksucking fag" when somebody just doing their job slightly inconveniences her in some way. I'm pretty sure the photographers weren't going to capture the baby's soul with their camera or kidnap it and sell it on the black market, so instead of blaming everybody else, how about tell your dad to chill the fuck out. I could be wrong, but I'm almost postive buildings in NYC have a back entrance,
As my headline clearly points out, the 65th Emmys were last night. Here are some winners you may care about. And if you're don't punch your nearest coworker over the fact that Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul were robbed, I say unto you: Get away from me you workers of lawlessness. I never knew you.
OUTSTANDING DRAMA SERIES
Breaking Bad, AMC
OUTSTANDING COMEDY SERIES
Modern Family, ABC
LEAD ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES
Claire Danes, Homeland, Showtime
LEAD ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES
Jeff Daniels, The Newsroom, HBO
LEAD ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Veep, HBO
SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES
Bobby Cannavale, Boardwalk Empire, HBO
SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES
Anna Gunn, Breaking Bad, AMC
SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES
Tony Hale, Veep, HBO
SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES
Merritt Wever, Nurse Jackie, Showtime
When a chick is hot, there's a level of crazy that you put up with, because hot girls are either insane or feel they have to be goofy nerds to be relatable to other people. That being said, here's Ireland Baldwin on Vine doing…..whatever the hell this is. Keep in mind she's 6'2", blonde, and models bikinis, so the dude recording this laughs nervously in hopes that his feigned acceptance will get him a blowjob later. Because crazy chicks are the best at giving blowjobs. I hope that clears everything up.