It remains unclear how we as a society allowed Iggy Azalaea to happen, but we did, so now we have to tolerate it and wait for her but implants to get infected so she’ll go away. Not sure if did this because it’s Thanksgiving is coming up or not, but she slipped her lumpy pot of mashed potatoes in a thong and twerked for Instagram. You can tell the snack she’s trying to serve here is unseasoned. You can probably find better at Boston Market.
Iggy Azalea and her comical ass implants are still a thing. This is Trump’s America. Getty tells us these pictures are “Iggy Azalea attends Univision’s “Premios Juventud” 2017 Celebrates The Hottest Musical Artists And Young Latinos Change-Makers at Watsco Center on July 6, 2017″, so I guess that means she’ll start talking with a Spanish accent now and rapping in Spanish and dating a basketball player from Mexico or Spain and saying she got her ass from eating churros then posting an Instagram pic of her teardrop tattoo and another pic of her at mass wearing her bedazzled cowboy hat. But she’ll never mention immigration or immigrants who are being deported by ICE.
Iggy Azalea and the Cash Me Outside chick are basically the same, except Iggy Azalea has to come all the way from Australia to be a black girl from the hood. She must have thought Danielle Bergoli was trying to take over block that nobody else wants to stand on and released a music video for her new song(?) “Mo Bounce”. Haha, “mo” means “more” if you didn’t know that from watching Yo MTV Raps! after school in Wales like Iggy did. I guess this song refers to her ass that she wants us to think looks like that picture when in reality Iggy Azalea’s ass looks like this. This video would have made more sense if the guy on the motorcycle was taking her to Popeye’s and he wasn’t driving a motorcycle he was driving a flatbed truck and she was strapped to the back and a TLC camera crew was there.
Back in March, Iggy Azaleafound out she was single on the Internet. Then she had a meltdown. I guess she’s okay now, because she’s posting a lot of ass pics on Instagram to attract another available suitor who will eventually cheat on her and her specially made toilet.
You can tell that Iggy Azalea is a legit rapper because she has Scarface on her shirt, but what you may not know is that she’s insane. Apparently she’s forgiven Nick Youngover this, but if he cheats again she’s gonna cut off his dick. She said it on “Orlando & The Freakshow” radio show on Wild 94.1 I’m sure all his friends and teammates haven’t mentioned or joked about this yet. Pretty sure of that. Men would never do that.
“No, I’m not cool with it. Like, you will have half a penis. I already said ‘One more video, just one more thing, and you will lose a quarter of your meat.’ That’s why he got to slide this time. Just let me get some real evidence, and you’re gonna lose half an inch.
I expect this marriage to last a long time, because every man loves the threat of the woman he shares a place with cutting off his dick. We love it! Can’t get enough. I bet they’re super happy and the house is always full of interesting and meaningful conversation. There’s no way he looks or talks to other chicks now. He has one who will cut off his dick! Can’t get much better than that when it comes to love.
Granted, Iggy Azalea‘s Twitter isn’t as batshit as Tila Tequila‘s, because mostly it’s about pizza and stuff that happened in 2014, but she did tell a story about pissing herself at the dentist yesterday while she was passed out. No word on whether Bill Cosby and R Kelly have bought the rights to this yet. (more…)