AHS: Emma Roberts And Evan Peters Are Engaged Again
AHS: Emma Roberts And Evan Peters Are Engaged Again

 

Emma Roberts and Evan Peters have broken up and been engaged more times than we have time to get into here, but look, they’re engaged again. #Pray4Evan

Reunited and it feels so good. Emma Roberts and Evan Peters are engaged again, multiple sources confirm to Us Weekly, and the pair indulged in some PDA during a walk through Provincetown, Massachusetts, over Thanksgiving…“Emma and Evan are engaged again,” one source tells Us. “She’s been wearing her ring on set. Everyone on set knows.”

Speaking of domestic violence, remember that time Emma Roberts got arrested for biting and whipping this dude’s ass and he refused to press charges? Probably because of the patriarchy and his white male privilege or something like. Wait, I think I’m mixing these up! Gotta read more Tumblr.

 

Emma Roberts has resting motherfucker I will cut you face:

 

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Emma Roberts Did Aerie In A Bra

If you’re basic and also on a budget, Emma Roberts wants you to know that it’s cool to shop at the girl American Eagle, Aerie. She looks pretty hot here. You might want to date her. If you do, Emma Roberts also wants you to know that she will drop kick you in the nose (because she’s “very passionate”) then dare your bitch ass to snitch. Then when you go out in public, she will be a sheer delight. I don’t know. The tits almost look kinda worth it.

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What’s Good, Emma Roberts?
What’s Good, Emma Roberts?

 

Emma Roberts assaulted her boyfriend but didn't get charged because she was just "emotional" and "passionate" (add that to my Lana Del Rey post) and she also looks like this in a bikini. So if you combine those two qualities, I'd very much like to have sex with her. Hopefully she wouldn't ask me to go in the water with her because she'll know my back would sting. It really is about the little things. She really is sweet once you get to know her. You don't know her like I do. She only hits me because she loves me.

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Here’s Some People Who Went To Coachella

I'm almost positive the tweakers at Coachella crashed Instagram this weekend leaving girls who took pictures of their thighs at the pool to be so done over having to wait to post them. So, if you haven't seen enough Coachella pics yet, hey, here's some more. Wow! How exciting!

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Emma Roberts Continues To Be A Wonderful Person

Cronuts are the new hipster bait now, so instead of going to the empty donut and croissant lines then getting one of each and eating them at the same time , they all stand in line for hours to get a donut and croissant mixed together. Cool. Anyway, since she recently assaulted her boyfriend and got away with it because ovaries, Emma Roberts thought another rules didn't apply to her as well. So when she saw a long as cronut line, she just decided to go to the front and skip everybody else. It didn't work. Daily Mail reports:

On Thursday, the actress was rather embarrassingly turned away from a New York bakery after attempting to skip the queue, according to onlookers. Emma rocked up at the Dominique Ansel Bakery, home to the Cronut – a combination of a croissant and donut which is currently all the rage.  Upon seeing a queue of hungry customers winding around the block, the 22-year-old and her publicist allegedly attempted to skip to the front, but were sent to the back of the line by the doorman. Emma apparently then slunk back to the end of the queue but gave up on waiting after several minutes.

There's a lot evil people in the world, but those assholes who try to cut in line is who Al Qaeda is really after. I bet you guys feel pretty dumb now, huh?

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Emma Roberts Didn’t Attack Anyone At The ‘We’re The Millers’ Premiere, Links

"I beat up my boyfriend, but Jenny Johnson doesn't tweet me everyday :(" – Emma Roberts

 

Stacey Cooke Caught Topless Sunbathing (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Justin Bieber Put A Fan’s iPhone Down His Pants Then Tossed It Into The Crowd [The Superficial]

Chrissy Teigen In Bridal Bikinis? Yes Please! [Popoholic]

Helen Flanagan Does FHM [Hollywood Tuna]

Katy Perry Farts In Front Of Robert Pattinson [Dlisted]

Rihanna's New Haircut Is Tore Up [Fishwrapper]

Hilary Duff posed with some homegrown sex toys (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]

Matt Damon with Halle Berry on his lap [Lainey Gossip]

Benedict Cumberbatch giving ‘acting lessons’ to his Russian lady Katia Elizarova [Celebitchy]

Ashley Benson Wore This The Gym [Moe Jackson]

James Cameron will be shooting THREE Avatar sequels simultaneously [Film Drunk]

Just Lena Dunham being personally fed by an assistant [Celebslam]

Drunk Girls Big Mouthing Beers [COED Magazine]

Sophia Bush at the Do Something Awards [The Blemish]

Do People Hate Mindy Kaling? [Evil Beet Gossip]

Potty Break at 49ers New Stadium? There’s an App For That [Crave Online]

Rob Lowe & Rashida Jones: Leaving ‘Parks and Recreation’ [Popbytes]

Get Revenge [MyEx]

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Don’t Worry, Guys. Emma Roberts Is Just ‘Very Passionate’

Like most women on Investigation Discovery and Jodi Arias, Emma Roberts isn't violent or insane, she's just "extreme" and "dramatic" and "very passionate" and "crazy in love". Awww, doesn't that sound sweet? It totally does! No charges were filed against Emma Roberts for busting Evan Peter's nose and biting him, because apparently it was just some just some huge misunderstanding. Apparently Evan Peters didn't understand women beat you because they love you so much. Us Weekly reports:

"Emma is very dramatic," one source tells Us of the We're the Millers actress, niece to superstar Julia Roberts, adding that she can get "wound up" during arguments. The July 7 episode, says the insider, went "way out of control." "They're a couple young kids," (Hi, it's me, Todd! I have a note: Emma Roberts is 22 and Evan Peters is 26. You know, "kids". ) adds a second source of the "inseparable" and openly affectionate pair, who've been dating since spring 2012. "Their romance is pretty extreme. They just behave in a way that's very passionate." This latest spat, doesn't mean the end of the road for the former Adult World costars, who next team up for season three of American Horror Story, currently shooting in New Orleans. "They will not break up," the first source insists. "When they are good, they are crazy in love."

Whew, I'm so glad I learned something. Emma Roberts' and Evan Peters' relationship is "very passionate and pretty extreme", but Rihanna's and Chris Brown's relationship is "abusive and hostile". Got it. Thanks for clearing that up for me, media!

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Emma Roberts Got Arrested For Beating Up Her Boyfriend

While we wait for Jezebel to tell us this was somehow her boyfriend's  fault because he didn't know who Susan B. Anthony was, here's a news story that's out today that tell us Emma Roberts was arrested for assualting and BITING Evan Peters in a Montreal hotel room. TMZ reports:

Emma Roberts was arrested for a domestic violence incident in Canada — after allegedly bloodying her boyfriend, Evan Peters … TMZ has learned.
22-year-old Emma — Eric Roberts' daughter and Julia Roberts' niece — was taken into custody early July 7 in Montreal after getting in an altercation with Peters … who stars in "American Horror Story." According to Montreal law enforcement sources … someone called police to report a fight in Evan and Emma's hotel room. We're told when cops arrived … they observed Evan with a bloody nose.  Emma was immediately arrested.  One law enforcement source tells us Evan also had a bite mark. Emma was released hours later because 26-year-old Evan did not want to press charges. Sources close to Emma tell TMZ … Emma and Evan were hitting each other and she was arrested because he had obvious physical injuries. The sources deny Emma bit Evan.

And since gender roles are a real thing, not a myth created by men to subjugate and marginalize women, this just made her a billion times hotter. You mean to tell me Emma Roberts is so filled with the crazy that she'll bite me and break my nose if I don't agree with her. Where do I sign up for the rest of that unfulfilled rage? Awwwwwww yeaaaaaahhhh, son!

 

Note: Why did he refuse to press charges? Does he live in constant fear that she'll retaliate? Is there a shelter he can go to or a hotline he can call? No? Ok, Good talk, you guys.

 

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Drew Barrymore Got Married

Drew Barrymore got hitched to Will Kopelman yesterday. Drew has been married twice and engaged another two times, all of which lasted about a year combined. But now she’s past 30, pregnant AND this one has buckets of his father’s money, so I assume she’ll stick with him for awhile. I mean congratulations to the happy couple and all that.

Since the only photos of the nuptials are grainy helicopter shots, none of which include the bride, here’s pictures Emma Roberts, another child star. She has great legs, but, unlike two members of her family, no Oscar nominations. Just saying.

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Emma Roberts Is Sheer



The only thing I really know about Emma Roberts is that she’s Julia Roberts’ niece and her dad is Eric Roberts and one time she was in a movie about a dog hotel or something. And now I know she wears sheer shirts where you can see her bra. Stay tuned for our next Emma Roberts post where we learn nothing of any interest whatsoever about her again!

Quick note: Apparently my photo editing software has been possessed by Satan and it’s taking me a very long time to edit pics. It also said if I bowed down in an act of worship it would give me a new Ferrari and Ashley Greene. I should probably definitely call somebody this.

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