Emily Ratajkowski Is Playing A “Girl Next Door Type” In A New NBC Show
Emily Ratajkowski Is Playing A “Girl Next Door Type” In A New NBC Show

 

NBC has a new show coming out called Bright Futures. Here’s how Variety describes it:

“….a group of friends all stumbling through the transition from the clueless, immature twentysomethings they are now to the successful professionals they’re destined to be. In addition, Lisa Kudrow will serve as the show’s narrator.”

So basically Friends. It’s gonna star Emily Ratajkowski, Lilly Singh, Shameik Moore, Jimmy Tatro, and Calum Worthy. Pretty diverse cast! But it’s “Hollywood diverse” in the sense they cast a bunch of black and brown people but three white guys will write the show. BUT HERE’S HOW EMILY RATAJKOWSKI‘S CHARACTER IS DESCRIBED:

Ratajkowski will play Sarah, described as a girl-next-door type but also with a behind-the-ear tattoo. She can just as easily bro out with the guys as she can be the girliest girl.

lol what. Now, I’m not sure what types of women the casting director lives next door to, but if Emily Ratajkowski is what Hollywood thinks is a “girl next door”, I don’t know what they’d cast you as girl reading this. A white walker? Something haunting a house? I think this show might be perpetuating damaging girl next door beauty standards. MY COLUMN:

 

 

banner pic = Instagram

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Emily Ratajkowski Loves Bikinis, Weed
Emily Ratajkowski Loves Bikinis, Weed

 

Emily Ratajkowski is always in bikini, and I didn’t think it would be easy to improve on that, but then she posted this picture on Instagram. She might be the perfect woman. I really don’t think it’s up for debate at this point.  The only thing that could change my mind is if she’s vegan and starts saying YouTube is demonetizing her videos. That would tell me instantly that she’s a member of the NRA.

 

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Emily Ratajkowski Is Doing Naked Stuff Again, Because Why Not?

A post shared by Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) on

 

You’re not going to believe this, and I had a hard time believing it myself, but Emily Ratajkowksi got naked for something. This time it was Vanity Fair. This is very empowering to me. I was going to write more, but I’m on social media and I see we’ve literally gone from “the increasingly militarized police are brutally killing POC at will” to “only police should have military weapons” in a matter of two months. I don’t know about you, but as a brown man in America, I’m ready for this utopia!

 

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Emily Ratajkowski Is Here To Help
Emily Ratajkowski Is Here To Help

 

To clean up the mess you all made with Ashley Graham, and because it’s my birthday, here’s Emily Ratajkowski in a bikini with her ever-present sideboob. Not sure I would recognize Emily Ratajkowski without sideboob. To recap, Emily Ratajkowski. My birthday. Sideboob. I feel like I should make a cake reference, but you get it.

 

A post shared by Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) on

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Emily Ratajkowski Naked & Other Stuff

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Harvey Weinstein is doing Harvey Weinstein things  [  Dlisted  ]

Ariel Winter forgot something  (NSFW site)   [  Taxi Driver Movie  ]

Alessandro Ambrosio in a bikini  [  DrunkenStepfather   ]

Mandy Moore is a thing again  [  Popoholic  ]

Remember Anastasia Ashley?  [  Egotastic  ]

Lilly Collins is still very pretty   [  Hollywood Tuna  ]

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Emily Ratajkowski Is In A Thong
Emily Ratajkowski Is In A Thong

 

Dude, what happened to Roy Moore? He rode in on a horse and hated gay and black people and everything. Thought for sure he’d have Alabama locked up. I guess the whole pedo thing was a big turn off to everyone except white evangelical Christians. Wild. As a liberal, I hope the Democrats cheering this on realize they can’t run against a racist, pedo every time and know that Doug Jones only won because he doesn’t like fondling 14-year-olds at the mall and not because his ideology won hearts and minds. Oh yeah, here’s Emily Ratajkowski in a thong on Instagram. She should let Doug Jones hit.

 

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The 2017 LOVE Advent Calendar Is Here
The 2017 LOVE Advent Calendar Is Here

 

It’s the reason for the season. The 2017 LOVE Advent Calendar. Of course, Emily Ratajkowski would be one of the first, because I assume she was camping out front until they let her end. Not sure what rubbing your boobs with pasta and grease in a warehouse has to do with Christ’s return, but that’s not for us to concern ourselves with. The point is, Emily Ratajkowski rubbing her boobs with pasta and grease in a warehouse with her special needs face that we have all chosen to ignore.

 

 

Ashley Graham was also asked because they had to check off that diversity box early. Her video is pretty much what you’d expect. Lots of closeups and shots that looks like she’s about to ruin a toilet. Sexy. They also made her pretend she was running. They probably had to pay her extra for that. I guess having Ashley Graham run herself in pasta would be too on the nose.

 

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Emily Ratajkowski Is For Regret Day
Emily Ratajkowski Is For Regret Day

 

Hey, friends. I hope everyone had a chill Thanksgiving and didn’t ruin everybody’s time by talking politics like some kind of idiot with a printed off topic list you found on Twitter. Nobody wanted to hear how you’ve been radicalized. America is pretty racist. Telling your racist uncle that won’t change that. Shut up and eat. I’m still in sweatpants as I write this, and probably won’t be able to eat food again until Tuesday, but I’ll make exceptions depending on what you mean by “eat”. Enter Emily Ratajkowski. She spent Thanksgiving on some kind of island in a bikini and took a lot of pictures like she usually does. But yes, going back to what I was saying about eating I would put the gravy I have in the tupperware on this.

 

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Emily Ratajkowski Is For Friday
Emily Ratajkowski Is For Friday

 

Lot of sexual assault stuff happening now. I don’t mean that to come across like when I think of Emily Ratajkowski that I think of sexual assault. I just meant there’s a lot of stuff happening right now. And apparently some women are disposable if the man accused really loves Jesus or if they use the #Resistance hashtag. That’s awesome. All the women I know love to be used as political pawns. Not exactly sure where Emily Ratajkowski’s bikini like stands on this issue, but I know where I stand on it. I feel it’s great for the country and a positive step in moving us forward.

 

 

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Emily Ratajkowski Is For Monday & Links
Emily Ratajkowski Is For Monday & Links

 

Shakira might be single  [  Dlisted  ]

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Ariel Winter is working out  [  DrunkenStepfather   ]

Emma Stone is greasy and perky  [  Popoholic  ]

Katharine McPhee is alive on Instagram  [  Egotastic  ]

Hey there, Xenia Deli  [  Hollywood Tuna  ]

Selena Gomez petting a dog  (NSFW site)  [  The Nip Slip   ]

Kaia Gerber, Cindy Crawford’s daughter, is nepotism model  [  Moe Jackson   ]

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