Anna Duggar Is Too Poor To Leave, Forced To Appear In The Spin-Off
Anna Duggar Is Too Poor To Leave, Forced To Appear In The Spin-Off


Anna Duggar still hasn’t filed for divorce from Josh Duggar after his family lied to her about molesting his sisters. And after he was caught having two Ashley Madison accounts. And after he paid $5,000 to bang a Danica Dillon. And after he sold their house to pay for the lawsuit that Danica Dillon has against him. Because that would make her a bad person and Jesus doesn’t like it when you get divorced. He said so. She’s also not leaving because Jesus told her to have four kids before she turned 28 instead of getting a degree. So now she’s forced to appear in yet another Duggar show to earn money for the parents of the man who ruined her life. God is great.

After appearing in a promo video for the “19 Kids and Counting” spin-off, “Jill & Jessa: Counting On,” Anna Duggar was reportedly forced to appear on the new reality show because of financial troubles…Reports claimed that Anna reluctantly agreed to be part of the new series to earn money for supporting her young children. The 27-year-old mother of four is reportedly having a hard time with her finances now that her husband has to stay at the treatment facility for an unspecified period.

Anna Duggar also recently got tested for STDs. I know she’s hard up for money, so somebody should tell her there’s a place she can go next time that won’t charge her anything. How awesome is that?! And they won’t even tell her it was her fault! So cool! She might get shot and killed while going in the building, but don’t worry! You’ll be dead and you can’t really hear people call you a slut or say that your death was a hoax when you’re dead! And if it is a hoax, guess what?! You’ll be alive again! I guess somewhere in hiding or wherever Obama puts those people. Maybe a tropical island! You might on a tropical island! Fuck yeah!


Phoebe Price did a Christmas card shoot. Josh Duggar could have had this 10 times for $5,000.




Shout out to the Duggar family tho:


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Jessa Duggar Is A Duggar Costume
 

A photo posted by Jessa Seewald (@jessaseewald) on


I really don’t know anything about Jessa Duggar‘s husband, but I can understand where he’d be down with a religion that says he can try to get Jessa pregnant at any time because that’s why she thinks she’s alive. I would have tried here if it was me, but it’s probably not really hard to nod convincingly during a story about a talking snake when they’re giving you the hot one. Also, I think a good costume idea for the Duggar chicks is to dress up like somebody who isn’t pregnant.

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The Duggars’ New Show Throws Josh Right Under The Bus
The Duggars’ New Show Throws Josh Right Under The Bus


Jessa and Jill Duggar come back to TLC with Jill & Jessa: Counting On (counting as in babies, the only math they’re allowed to use) and according to the first sneak peek, they immediately throw Josh Duggar under the bus then detonate the IED they had planted on the bus. 


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‘Law & Order: SVU’ Is Doing A Duggar Episode Nov. 4th

Hopefully, they’ll just all be happy to be back on TV.

In “Patrimonial Burden,” the Wednesday, Nov. 4, episode of the long-running NBC drama, the squad investigates a famous reality TV family after it’s discovered the 13-year-old daughter is pregnant. Naturally, there’s a web of secrets at play in with this virtuous family…”With the Duggar one, it was like the double-whammy because it was his sisters and the fact—I mean, honestly, I feel like we’re dealing with some topics this season that feel a bit meatier than some lunatic fringe family…I wouldn’t mind doing one just because I have never been so infuriated with someone’s level of hypocrisy, and lying, and then displacement of responsibility onto something else,” Peter Scanavino, Detective Carisi on the show, said. “When I think about that guy, it boils my blood, I will say.”

If you anybody has any tea, I’d like to come over and borrow some, please. I sipped all mine reading that quote.

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Jessa Duggar Is Giving Birth Live On TLC
Jessa Duggar Is Giving Birth Live On TLC


Since Jessa Duggar has the only job that fundamentalist Christianity allows her to have,  and her husband, Ben Seewald, just got a political science “degree” from a community college, the manna from heaven isn’t really raining into bank their account like it should. Not much money to get a good seed going. Thankfully, Jessa Duggar believes in Jesus. And we all know that when one vagina closes and ruins your family’s thirst for attention and TLC checks, Jesus allows another one to open so you can monetize your miracle. God bless.


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Jim Bob And Michelle Are Stunned
Jim Bob And Michelle Are Stunned


“Let mommy and daddy show you how God says you make the sex.”


Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are reportedly clutching their five loaves of bread and two fish in disbelief that their firstborn, Josh Duggar,  they let go on molestafest for years then covered it up would be addicted to porn and cheat on his wife because they didn’t let him watch the box that Satan live in, so how could he know what sex is?

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Michelle Duggar Had A Miscarriage

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On Thursday, doctors were unable to find the heartbeat of Michelle Duggar‘s unborn child. Oh, cheer up. She has 19 more. People reports:

“After the appointment, we came back home and told the children,” says Michelle, 45. “We had just been talking about baby names last night and they were getting excited about naming a boy or a girl. It has been a real sad disappointment.” She says the family will select a name after they know if the baby was a boy or girl, and then plan to have a funeral service. “I feel like my heart broke telling my children,” says Michelle. “They have all been so excited about this baby and looking forward to April coming around and having a new little one in our arms. That was the most difficult. The Lord is the giver of life and he can choose when that life is ready to go on and be with Him.”

So, basically Michelle Duggar just said God struck her baby dead in her womb because he wanted it for himself. The conceit and absurdity in that statement aside, God is apparently the world’s most successful child murderer. In a more likely scenario Michelle, your last child was delivered by an emergency c-section because you’re 45 and your uterus has been spitting out humans like a car full of Mexicans that just got into an accident. Maybe this your body’s way of telling you to swing by Rite-Aid and pick up some condoms. Or have your vagina sewn shut.

Note: Before you start with how I’m an asshole for not showing respect over this tragedy, look at that banner picture. That’s the real tragedy. In her inculcated and indoctrinated mind, she probably thinks she’s failed as a wife and a “good Christian” because she couldn’t bring yet another damn baby into the world. You know, because that’s apparently the only reason God puts women here in the first place.

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Michelle Duggar Announces She’s Pregnant With 2,178th Baby

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Even though God’s last miracle was born three and half months prematurely and almost killed her with preeclampsia because she’s 45 and God is no match for science, Michelle Duggar announced this morning on Today that she’s expecting her 20th child who will eventually be a socially awkward weirdo in bangs and a jean skirt who wants to fuck Jesus. God is great! MSNBC reports:

Michelle Duggar and her husband Jim Bob are expecting their 20th child, the couple revealed exclusively to TODAY. “We are so excited,” Michelle Duggar told TODAY Moms before the broadcast. Now three and a half months pregnant, the mom of 19 says she was actually surprised to discover that she’s expecting again at 45. “I was not thinking that God would give us another one, and we are just so grateful.” The super-sized family stars in its own reality TV show, “19 Kids and Counting,” on TLC (guess they will have to update the title!). When the Duggars visited TODAY last June, it was the longest Michelle had gone without a pregnancy in more than 20 years. Backstage, she told TODAY Moms that her baby days might be over – and she was fine with that. But the Duggars have always said they leave their family planning up to God, eschewing birth control. “When we look at Josie … even knowing that we went through the challenge that we did, we would do it again,” Michelle told TODAY’s Meredith Vieira last year from the family home in Springdale, Ark. Michelle Duggar’s last pregnancy was fraught with danger. She suffered from gall-bladder problems as well as preeclampsia. In order to save her life, doctors delivered daughter Josie three and a half months prematurely – she weighed only one pound, six ounces at birth, and endured a series of health emergencies, including a perforated bowel. Josie eventually went home with the rest of the Duggar family, and is now a healthy toddler who will celebrate her second birthday in December.

As the great Chinese philosopher, Sun Tzu, once said, “Look, bitch. It’s a vagina. Not a clown car.” Christ, was there a flood recently? The world has 7 billion people already, stop trying to repopulate the earth you fucking idiots. Just because your husband gives you a curling iron in exchange for making you a broodmare doesn’t make you blessed. It just means that in a few years TLC will be able to charge for walkthrough tours of your vagina.

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They’re Having Another Kid. That Makes 19.



Jim-Bob Duggar and his human slot machine wife, Michelle, are expecting their 19th child. If you want to do the math on this, their oldest son is 21. People reports:
“We are so thrilled,” says Michelle, 42. “We just couldn’t believe it is happening.” Jim Bob, 44, agrees: “This never gets old. We are so grateful for each child. We are looking forward to our first grand baby and our 19th child.” Oldest son Joshua, 21 and his wife Anna, 21, are expecting daughter Mackynzie Renée next month, so she will be older than her new aunt or uncle. “I think it is going to be awesome, it is going to be great,” says Josh about the news that his parents are expecting. “We have been looking forward to the arrival of my little girl and to now get to celebrate for my parents, it’s a wonderful thing.”

Jesus, who does this dude think he is, Noah? He doesn’t have to go forth and repopulate the Earth. Damn dude, give this chick a break. She’s been pregnant for twenty years. Her vagina probably looks like Stargate by now.

I refuse to look for pictures of these lunatics, so here’s Kelly Brook. You’re welcome:

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