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Thanks to or because of TMZ and Hustler, the first pics of Real Housewives of New Jersey Danielle Staub’s sex tape have been released. Due to the suggestive powers of the mind, I didn’t really look for the actual NSFW pics, because just look at that banner pic. If I saw that coming toward my dick, I’d cross myself and pray I burst into flames.
I’m not gay or a 30-year old woman who wishes her life turned out differently, so I have never see one single episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Maybe the banner pic explains why. Her name is apparently Danielle Staub. She’s apparently on the show. She apparently fucked some guy and filmed it.TMZ reports:
Another “celebrity” sex tape is about to hit the market — and this time, the people distributing the footage claim the star is Danielle Staub from “Real Housewives of New Jersey.” Hustler Inc. tells us it is all set to distribute a 75 minute tape, featuring Jersey’s most hated Housewife — and mother of two — in a naked romp with a mystery man. A rep from Hustler tells us the tape was shot last September — several months after 47-year old Staub first appeared on the Bravo reality show. The tape is set to be released on June 14.
Man, I can hardly wait! A botoxed 47-year old mother of two having sex?! On camera?! Whoa, why is the being released to the public?! The sun just winked at me, so we’re just lucky I guess!