This Picture Was Photoshopped To Hell. Sorry, Ladies
This Picture Was Photoshopped To Hell. Sorry, Ladies


The only way women can support a supermodel is if she looks gross in some way, so when this “untouched” picture from Cindy Crawford‘s shoot for Marie Claire Mexico hit online last month, women the world over were calling her a hero and an inspiration. Because, well, if Cindy Crawford can look like a failed experiement, they can feel better about themselves. But as it turns out, she’s suing everybody.

Cindy Crawford‘s stock in trade is her body and now her people are out for blood, claiming the person who posted this pic (above) severely altered it to make her look bad.  The lawyer for Cindy’s photographer fired off a letter — obtained by TMZ — threatening everyone who posted the pic with a lawsuit if they didn’t take it down and apologize. The lawyer says the original pic was stolen and then doctored to make her midsection look haggard.  The lawyer included a statement from the famous photog, who says he took the pic for Marie Claire Mexico and someone stole it from him and Photoshopped it.  The letter apparently worked … some media outlets are already complying.

Cindy Crawford’s husband posted this pic on Instagram the day after, so I’m sorry if that boost of self-esteem you got died a quick death as soon as you got it. Stop eating so much Chipotle. That might help.



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Hey, It’s Cindy Crawford Without Photoshop


This weekend, the Internet collectively flipped its body image shit over an untouched picture of Cindy Crawford, who Charlene White claimed was for an issue of Marie Claire featuring Cindy Crawford without Photoshop. Cool. Fans are calling it “inspirational“. Wait, what?

An unretouched photo of Cindy Crawford has been circulating on Twitter this morning, revealing a body that defies expectations—it is real, it is honest, and it is gorgeous. While the claim accompanying the photo (which you can see here) is that it will be printed in an upcoming issue of Marie Claire, its origins are actually from a December 2013 cover story from Marie Claire Mexico and Latin America. It appears that this unretouched version is a leak. No matter where the photo came from, it’s an enlightenment — we’ve always known Crawford was beautiful, but seeing her like this only makes us love her more.

Like, what’s inspirational about this pic exactly? That Cindy Crawford is about 30 years from the grave, but still kinda looks okay in a bikini if you squint your eyes and tilt your head back? Like who is this inspiring? 48-year old women? That’s great and all, but the only this would be an inspiration to them is if they looked like Cindy Crawford when she was was 25. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say they didn’t. If you really want to be inspired, accept your own mortality and don’t let your age or how you look in a bikini define your self-worth. A better tip would be just not to put on a bikini at 48. Nobody wants to see that. Your son got you a nice sweater for Christmas with a mock turtleneck. Put that on and treat yourself to something nice at Bob Evans.

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Cindy Crawford Went To Cannes

Cindy Crawford may be 47 here at the 66th Cannes Film Festival, but trust me when I say this: I'd hit like a drone over a hospital in Aghanistan. I don't even know how many of you knew you were conscious in the 90's, so if you getting your diaper changed then, I apologize. Because Cindy Crawford used to look like THIS. I just talked to my penis and that's how he chooses to remember her.

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Cindy Crawford Didn’t Think This Through

I have no idea what Cindy Crawford is doing in the April issue of Allure, but it’s pretty obvious the photographer was wearing a lavender silk scarf, a monocle, and smoking his Benson & Hedges through a gold cigarette holder while he tickled the teenage Latin boy in the cutoff jeans shorts and mesh tube top. I don’t want to tell anyone how to do their job, but if you want me to jerk off, you’d gonna have to think of something better than a piece of bread and a robot who brushes teeth. Like tan lines, for example.

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Wink-Link, Nudge-Nudge

Oh, so that’s where hipsters come from. I would have thought a horse’s ass, but this is pretty close.

Carmen Electra might be addicted to sex toys. Also reported: She’s not even trying to hide that hideous bra. [Hollywood Tuna]

Lily Allen: “I know lots of people who take cocaine three nights a week and get up and go to work…But we never hear that side of the story.” [I’m Not Obsessed]

Real World: Brooklyn vs. real world Brooklyn [Complex]

Cameron Diaz
nipple-slips? Why not? [City Rag]

Busted-looking star of the day: Debra Messing. [Celebslam]

Cindy Crawford doesn’t let her daughter watch Hanna Montana because it makes her a little bitch. [Celebitchy]

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Cindy Crawford is a Good Start

The race to see which celebrity has the best Halloween costume officially began last night when Cindy Crawford showed up to a party dressed as Amy Winehouse. Heidi Klum usually owns Halloween, but Cindy Crawford is far and away the early winner. Especially since she gets extra points for making me say “Amy Winehouse” and “oral sex” in the same sentence.

And here’s Amy Winehouse on her way to the hospital on Saturday where she’s reportedly being treated for a chest infection:

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Cindy Crawford is in a Bikini

Cindy Crawford was in St. Tropez this weekend, and yes, she’s still hot. And yes, she’s 42. So, why don’t all 42 year old chicks look like this? I bet it would really help with global warming and feeding the children. I’m not really sure how exactly, but people usually go along with stuff if you say it’s for the environment and the children. I don’t know, they just do. What I’m, a doctor? I’m sorry if you believed that last night, baby.

Photos: Splash


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Cindy Crawford Had a Hawaiian Thanksgiving

Cindy Crawford is still pretty much getting it done. She looks better than half of Hollywood’s young “starlets” (like her, her, or her), and I’d dare any of them to stand next to Cindy in a bikini. They wouldn’t even be able to let out a scream before the trap door opened.

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Drunky Linkford

Pedophile, R. Kelly, is finally going to court [Dlisted]
Kanye West is still whiter than most “wiggers” [Hollywood Rag]
Kevin Smith is still not funny [College Humor]
Heidi Klum is “normal,” and hot [Popsugar]
Heidi Klum is hotter than Marisa Miller [Hollywood Tuna]
Scarlett Johansson does Luis Vuitton [Egotastic]
Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes are assholes [City Rag]
Rihanna is lame [Just Jared]
Bobby Brown is is helping make Americans look dumb [ASL]
Heidi Klum is still hotter than Marisa Miller [Popoholic]
T.A.T.U. pseudo-lesbian’s upskirt (NSFW ads) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Ashley Tisdale poses for a photo-op (NSFW ads) [Drunken Stepfather]
Superbad trailer: R-rated version [Horny Oyster]

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