Chrissy Teigen Is Misunderstood

If you’ve ever heard Chrissy Teigen speak or read anything she puts on Twitter, then you realize she doesn’t take herself or life too seriously. Which is why she’s basically universally loved and a 9-time Grammy winner asked her to be his wife (see how that works, ladies?). But apparently a few people got upset because she made a joke (which coincidentally, happens a lot on Twitter. The eggs, man. It’s always the eggs.)
Us Magazine reports:

“We keep pushing the date,” she said, adding that it will “definitely” happen in 2013. “If it’s not this year, I’m out.”


“Obviously it was a joke,” Teigen explained. “I don’t even care about getting married.”

People of course will jump on that last part, so it’s a good thing Chrissy doesn’t give a fuck. Because you know who cares about getting married? John Legend. Why? Because he’s marrying Chrissy Teigen. Dude, ook at him in this banner picture. He looks like my 3-year old nephew when I say I have candy. John’s wedding gift to himself is to clone Chrissy so he can marry her twice.

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Chrissy Teigen Is A Great Model

I'm not saying that John Legend should have spent a lot on Chrissy's engagement ring, but if I were to ever steal it and pawn it, I should be able to buy at least five newborns on the the black market. And then have enough left over to buy a new car and iTunes gift cards for all my friends and family. And then maybe a nice steak at Applebee's.

source = Twitter



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Chris Brown Fans Sent Chrissy Teigen Death Threats

“I whip my awesome bangs back and forth.”

During Chris Brown‘s Billboard Music Awards performance, Chrissy Teigen tweeted, “Why sing when you can dance?”. Nailed it. But since fans of an unstable lunatic and emotionally stunted child with rage issues are just as batshit, they immediately attacked her. With death and rape threats. Yeah. That’s sounds like a pretty reasonable response. TMZ reports:

Teigen has been under fire ever since she tweeted about Brown’s performance Sunday night. Team Breezy went insane … hammering Chrissy with horrible messages that read:

— “all you do is talk s**t, you need to be raped and murdered.”
— “killyoself bitch ur nothing but tall thats why you model. your nothing.”
— “ditzy dumb ass tramp your mother should’ve aborted you.”
— “i hope you are the next ‘celebrity’ to die”
— “you have the brain capacity of a turtle, just die.”

Oh, and here’s some more:

— “I wish George Zimmerman woulve shot ur annoying ass instead of poor Trayvon Martin”
— “Casey anthony shouldve buried u in her backyard instead. Sad that Caylee had to go and ur still here being a dumb bitch.”

Chrissy only had this to say. Again, nailed it.

“Reallllly makes me sad that 99% of the most disturbing comments come from young girls. I’ll end it there but it make me sad. I have some screen caps. And I will do everything I can to make sure people know, internet or not, you CAN’T say this s**t.”

Chris Brown, being the bitch he is (have I called him a bitch yet?), responded exactly the way you’d expect him to respond:

Wow. Okay. Look, I really don’t need to run down the reasons why Chris Brown is a sociopath in a sleeveless jean jacket. But if you’re openly threatening to kill a woman to defend a bitch who almost beat another one to death while he gladly sits back without telling you to stop, then you need to be real with yourself exactly why you’re a Chris Brown fan. Here’s a hint: It’s not because he can dance. You might just want to take a deep breath, step away from the computer, hug a family member, then go ask a judge if the state has any current records on your father’s whereabouts.

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Brooklyn Decker Had A Premiere, Links

Kim Kardashian is too trashy for Anna Wintour [The Superficial]
Jennifer Love Hewitt is very leggy [Popoholic]
Chloe Grace Moretz is far from legal [Hollywood Tuna]
Real Housewives of NY’s Kelly Bensimon needs a bigger bathing suit (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Andrew W. K. is 33 [Dlisted]
Anja Rubik’s hip bone is very pointy (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Against Me! singer Tom Gabel has come out as transgender Johnny Depp‘s midlife crisis continues [Celebuzz]
Candice Swanepoel is topless in Vogue Italy (NSFW site)[The Nip Slip]
How To Survive A Robot Uprising [COED Magazine]
10 Mitt Romney Running Mate Suggestions [College Humor]
34 behind the scenes photos from the Indiana Jones movies [The Chive]
Kelly Brook. That’s all you need to know [Moe Jackson]
The Megan Fox womb-watch continues [Celebslam]
Even more on the John Travola lawsuit [Evil Beet Gossip]
Andrew Garfield in i-D magazine [Amy Gindhouse]
Jessica Biel is on twitter now [Lainey Gossip]
Miley Cyrus ruins everything [Cityrag]
The Islamic Defenders Front does not approve of Lady Gaga [Popcrush]
Obviously there will be an Avengers 2 [Film Drunk]
Russell Brand ripped apart a heckler, then probably slept with his girlfriend [Celebrity VIP Lounge]

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Chrissy Teigen Is For A Good Cause

Chrissy Teigen‘s Twitter should one day be in the Library of Congress (unlike mine which is lame), but her other good deeds include attending the 9th Annual Project Sunshine “Sunshine In The City” Benefit in New York last night. Let me preface this by saying that Chrissy is the coolest famous person I’ve even hung out with. And by “hung out with” I mean I had a bunch of drinks with her and John Legend once in Charlotte and I was pretty shitfaced and the chick I was with was crying in the bathroom and Chrissy held her hair back while she puked then I woke up in the Ritz-Carlton where I’m pretty sure a cat threw a table on my head and shit in my mouth while I sleeping. I also had nail marks down my back. Good times. Anyway, she looks pretty hot here. And if you think she looks hot, check out the guy in the wheelchair. He can barely even stand it!

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Happy New Year!

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Well, another year has come to an end, and to be honest, I can’t believe I will have been here six years next month. Fuck. Six years. What have I done with my life?! But most importantly, I think we’re mostly shocked that Lindsay Lohan isn’t dead yet. That seems like it should have happened by now, right? It does, doesn’t it? Anyway, while she will continue to taunt me in 2012, I’d like to take this time to thank everyone of you who condescends to read this site everyday. Jess and I really do appreciate it, because we know there are a billion other sites out there that have fully grasped that whole grammar and punctuation thing. Also, Jess says if we reach 10,000 fans on Facebook she’ll have sex with me then bake me something. So, let’s ring in the New Year by making that happen. In a more realistic scenario, you guys be safe tonight because we love each and everyone of you. We’re basically like a big misfit fam…what? No not like that. What would make you think we loved you like that? Jesus, dude why do you have to be such a homo all the time? It’s exhausting.

Note: Our annual “Hottest Chick” and “Best Posts” of the year will be up on Tuesday. We’re taking votes here, so if you’re not sloppy drunk and embarrassing your family and all those around you, feel free to give us a suggestion or just email it to

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Singer/pimp John Legend proposed to his girlfriend of four years, model/chef/drunk bitch babysitter Christine Teigen, this weekend while on vacation in Maldives. Jesus would be pleased. People reports:

“Ordinary People” soul singer John Legend is doing something extraordinary – he’s getting married. “John Legend and his girlfriend, model Chrissy Teigen, got engaged over the holidays while vacationing in the Maldives,” Legend’s rep, Cindi Berger, tells PEOPLE. No further details were provided, but Legend’s whereabouts this coming weekend are being reported in Las Vegas newspapers.

I know, you’re expecting a joke here, but there’s not much to say when two cool, funny, attractive people are in love and decide to get married. Although I would like to point out that when I ordered Chinese food on Christmas day, they gave me two free egg rolls by mistake. Sorry, world. I know it may be hard, but try not to compare your weekend to mine and John’s. Just be thankful for what you do have.

Note: “‘Ordinary People’ soul singer John Legend is doing something extraordinary – he’s getting married.” (The editors at People pay good money for quality writing like that, just fyi)

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John Legend Is Very Smooth

Although John Legend is uncomfortable with the one arm bro hug and wearing anything that can’t be tucked in, he seems very comfortable with pulling Chrissy Teigen‘s shirt down to expose her bra. He seems almost too comfortable. It’s almost like he’s done it before. Oh God, I hope this doesn’t mean they’re having premarital sex.

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Chrissy Teigen Does Esquire

There’s not much left to say about Chrissy Teigen that I haven’t already said, so here she is talking about herself finally in Esquire. Yes, she’s that funny. Yes, she looks the exact same way in real life. Yes, I’m wearing a black shirt and a brown belt today. Jesus. Is there anything else you wanna know? What’s with all the questions? What are you, a cop?

You can check out all the pics and the interview here.

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