Christina Aguilera Did Paper Magazine
Christina Aguilera Did Paper Magazine

 

Not gonna lie, I thought this was Kesha at first, but then I realized I’ve seen Kesha without makeup before and this picture was more attractive than that, so I thought it was Kesha without makeup that they somehow photoshopped. Then I clicked on the post and found out it was Christina Aguilera without makeup for Paper Magazine. Then I got kind of interested because Paper usually puts up women who are naked then I realized it was just Kim Kardashian because she won’t approve of any picture unless she’s naked. By the time I downloaded these pictures I was already bored, so now you can we can all be bored together.

 

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Hello, Christina Aguilera
Hello, Christina Aguilera

 

It’s easy to forget to how hot Christina Aguilera was before the Latin genes and having a bunch of kids caught up to her, but she wants to remind you in Instagram with a few pics in black and white that she took in very low lighting with several filters. You know, much like your Instagram pics. The rack still looks great and what an amazing bathtub. Very decadent.

 

A post shared by Christina Aguilera (@xtina) on

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Christina Aguilera’s Whitney Houston Tribute Went Over Well
Christina Aguilera’s Whitney Houston Tribute Went Over Well

 

Christina Aguilera did a Whitney Houston tribute at the 2017 AMAs last night, and since the Internet hates everything, everybody had a take. Look, we all know Christina can blow, but she legit can’t help herself from taking a simple note and turning it into some kind of vocal parkour when it really doesn’t need to be that extra. Just sing the song. You tried, but Whitney didn’t die in a bathtub for this.

 

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Kylie Jenner Went To Christina Aquilera’s Birthday Party Dressed As Xtina
Kylie Jenner Went To Christina Aquilera’s Birthday Party Dressed As Xtina

 

I guess since it worked so well for Halloween, Kylie Jenner attended Christina Aguilera‘s 35th birthday party dressed as “Xtina” again. This is a photo and video from said birthday party. From what I can tell from these, there was probably a lot of gay people there who said “yasssss!” a lot at things. If that guy in the back is gay, he’s probably about to say it.

 

Happy Birthday @xtina !!!!!!

A video posted by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

 

banner pic = Instagram

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Christina Aguilera Wore This Dress

I’m not going to ask why Christina Aguilera was invited to the Breakthrough Prize ceremony at NASA Ames Research Center where they give out awards and money to physicists, mathematicians, and life scientists, but maybe she thought her boobs were up for some kind of award. Based on these pictures, they could teach us a lot about physics or the effects of chocolate macaroni and cheese cake on the body.

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Christina Aguilera Took A Topless Selfie
Christina Aguilera Took A Topless Selfie

 

To celebrate Kylie’s 18th birthday, Kim Kardashian took a naked selfie because Kris Jenner forced her (no seriously). Then 9 hours ago, Christina Aguilera posted a topless selfie, because apparently yesterday was Take Your Mom To Naked Selfie Day. I don’t know if this should become a thing. Think of the children.

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Christina Aguilera Isn’t Rihanna Or Gigi Hadid

I don’t have access to the Rihanna in a bikini pics or the Gigi Hadid in a bikini pics, so to make you feel my pain, here’s Christina Aguilera at The Voice Season 8 thing or whatever this event is supposed to be. As you can see, Christina Aguilera isn’t in a bikini. And shouldn’t wear a bikini. Or be allowed in the same room as a bikini. Or be allowed to say the word bikini. Or know what a bikini looks like. And should have her punch card revoked at Cook Out. And not be allowed withing a 100 yards of a Cook Out. Or a beach. A place where she might have a midnight feeding that would scare homeless people or any marine mammals that may have surfaced at that particular time.

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Christina Aguilera Did A Britney Impression Better Than Britney

It was cool at the Oscars when Lady Gaga sang shit from The Sound Of Music and everybody said, “oh yeah, she can sing. forgot about that”. But you can have your memory wiped and still know that Christina Aguilera can sing better than about 99% of the people who have ever lived on the Earth. That’s just pretty much a fact. That being said, she went on Jimmy Fallon last night and did “random” musical impressions. One was Britney Spears. So if you ever wondered what Britney Spears would sound like if her voice wasn’t computer generated, then you’re in luck.

 

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Christina Aguilera Finally Got A Check To Show Us Her Kid
Christina Aguilera Finally Got A Check To Show Us Her Kid

 

Negotiating prices with print publications to pimp out your kid can be a tedious and exhausting process (unless you’re Kris Jenner), so I’m happy to see People and Christina Aguilera could come to a number that was satisfactory. The child looks happy and exciting, because her brain has yet to fully form and she doesn’t realize her birth certificate says “Summer Rain“.

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Christina Aguilera Had Another Kid
Christina Aguilera Had Another Kid

 

Christina Aguilera had her second baby with her second baby daddy this weekend. Congrats!

The Voice coach and fiancé Matt Rutler welcomed a daughter on Saturday, Aug. 16 in Los Angeles, her rep confirms to PEOPLE. “So proud to welcome our beautiful daughter Summer Rain Rutler into the world,” the singer Tweeted early Monday morning. This is the second child for Aguilera, 33, who is already mom to a 6½-year-old son, Max Liron, from her previous marriage to Jordan Bratman.

I don’t know. “Summer Rain” kinda sounds like a feminine hygiene product, but I guess I’ve heard worse baby names. To take away some of Christina’s attention, Britney Spears nominated herself for the KFC Bucket challenge.

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