Channing Tatum And Jenna Dewan Are Getting A Divorce Now, I Guess
Channing Tatum And Jenna Dewan Are Getting A Divorce Now, I Guess

 

Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan have been married so long I forgot they were married, but it looks like they aren’t gonna be married anymore. People tells me they met in 2006 and Jenna hyphenated her name in 2009. Anyway, they’re separating/divorcing as told by this weird Instagram post they put up last night.

 

 

Lots of things going on in that post. A super happy greeting, a Trump dig, what looks to be quadruple spacing, and the fact that Channing refers to himself as “Chan.” Look, they’ve been together for eleven years and married for nine, and this isn’t like 1950 where you have to marry someone when you’re 20 then die with them. I’m sure they love each other and whatever, but nobody is the same person eleven years later. Shit changes. You change. Be happy apart instead of miserable together. I am now a marriage counselor. Please contact me for all your marriage counseling needs.

 

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Channing Tatum Really Loves Caps Lock

 The Sony email leaks are the gift that keeps on giving this holiday season, and while most of them are vile, racist, dysfunctional bullshit, here’s Channing Tatum’s email to Jonah Hill, Sony Pictures co-chair Amy Pascal, and people involved with 22 Jumpstreet after they received the opening box office numbers. He seems really excited about it. 

On Jun 14, 2014, at 2:19 PM, “33& out inc C/O FULTON & MEY” <[EMAIL REDACTED]> wrote:

F YOU TED !!!! SECOND OF ALLLL TIMMMMME BEEEOTCH!!!! COME ON JUMPSTREETERS WE GOT CATE BLANCHETT WIT DIS BOX OFFICE BITCHES!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

 I actually had to cut the rest of it. The rest of it being literally “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA” for like twenty more pages. Sony should buy the rights to this email, because it would be great for the updated version of The Shining.

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Channing Tatum Isn’t Quite Jean-Claude Van Damme

 

Ok, I'm going to speak my truth to everyone. I really liked Magic Mike. I don't really care that it was about male strippers, because movies about female strippers suck as a general rule (I'm looking at you Showgirls). Channing Tatum is never gonna win an Oscar, but he seems like a likeable dude and he gets to impregnate Jenna Dewan, so let's not look at him like he's made the mistake in his life while you're reading this eating ravioli out of a can. Anyway, this video is pretty funny. Watch it with me, won't you?

 

(via Uproxx)

Related Posts:

Tags:
People Named Channing Tatum The Sexiest Man Alive



You can read how Channing Tatum feigned surprise or how he’s “a sculptor who quotes Edgar Allan Poe” or how “emotionally deep and spiritually open” he is here, or you can go to another site and read literally anything else.

Related Posts:

Tags:
Channing Tatum Really Did This


Apparently this is news but back in 1999, actor(?) Channing Tatum was a stripper in Florida. Us Magazine reports:

Then 18, the star — who performed under the alias “Chan Crawford” — approached the troupe’s owner London Steele at a now-defunct Florida nightclub about a job. “He was shy at first, but he really knew how to work the stage,” Steele tells Us, adding that Tatum lip-synched in the act and earned $50 a night (plus tips) during his year-long stint. “The women went crazy for him!” Steele added. Unfortunately for them, the revue had a strict no-nudity policy.

I’ll be honest, I didn’t watch this whole video, because wiggers in baggy clothes doing something that looks like dancing to Time Life’s Pure 90’s isn’t really my thing. My (more…)

Related Posts:

Tags:
Johnny Depp is John Dillinger



Here are the first shots of Michael Mann’s new project, Public Enemies, a film about the F.B.I’s war against notorious American gangsters John Dillinger, Baby Face Nelson and Pretty Boy Floyd. It stars Johnny Depp, Christian Bale, Channing Tatum, and Marion Cotillard. Man, I didn’t realize criminals were so sexy back then. I bet all the ladies in the bank were excited when it was bank robbery day. It was like their Grey’s Anatomy.

Related Posts:

Tags: , , ,