Tony Romo Had A Kid



HEAR THAT JESSICA???!!! HAVE THE DAMN THING ALREADY!! Per Dallas Cowboys’ Twitter:

Congratulations to Tony Romo, proud papa of Hawkins Crawford Romo, born yesterday at 5:30pm. 8 lbs 8 oz

“Hawkins Romo” sounds like a gay pirate, but I just hope the baby is okay. Because there’s a good chance the nurse handed it to Tony Romo and he fumbled it.

Related Posts:

Tags: , ,
Tony Romo Got This Pregnant

This will turn out great. E! Online says:

So which former flame of Jessica Simpson is procreating and proud of it? It’s Tony Romo! The newlywed Dallas Cowboy, who tied the knot with Chace Crawford’s sister, Candice Crawford Romo, just five months ago, announced to a group of high school students, of all people, that he was about to be a papa. “I actually got one on the way,” he told students at Ceder Hill High when asked if he had any kids. “My wife’s pregnant.”

I’d congratulate them, but this is more frightening than celebratory. If Romo plans on ever holding this child, here’s hoping Candice lists “helmets” on her baby registry.

Related Posts:

Tags: , ,
Tony Romo Completes A Successful Handoff

[SinglePic not found]

As TMZ so eloquently says, this is the only time Tony Romo could take a knee this year, and it happened to be the moment when he proposed to his girlfriend and drag show Chace Crawford, Candice Crawford. When asked for comment, Jessica Simpson said, “Why do I need to get a clean plate every time? I always lick off all the gravy, so I don’t really see the big deal. What’s wrong with you people?”

Related Posts:

Tags: , ,
Jessica Simpson Is Stress Eating Right Now

[SinglePic not found]

As is the case in all of her relationships, when Jessica Simpson was dating Tony Romo, she told anybody who would listen that she had found her “soul mate” and hinted that marriage was inevitable. Then Tony Romo dumped her ass two days before her birthday. Two months later, Romo started dating former Miss Missouri, Candice Crawford (sister of Gossip Girl star and prancing gaywad Chace Crawford). They are now engaged. Us Magazine reports:

Another ex-beau of Jessica Simpson has chosen his bride! Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo is engaged to Candice Crawford, his rep confirms to UsMagazine.com exclusively. Dating since September 2009, Romo, 30, proposed to Crawford in Dallas on Thursday, her 24th birthday.

On the brightside, Candice Crawford is skinny and has actually won something without her daddy having to pay everyone off first, but unlike with Jessica Simpson, Han Solo can’t take Romo’s lightsaber and split open her stomach to keep Romo warm from the coldness of his 4-9 record. But as a sidenote, blondes aren’t really my thing. And blondes really aren’t my thing when they look EXACTLY like their brother in a wig and lipgloss. When I downloaded this picture, I actually had to double check that the file name didn’t include the words “Priscilla” or “desert.”

Related Posts:

Tags: , ,
Tony Overthromo Has Moved On



Jessica Simpson can go cry in her Moose Tracks now, because less than two months after dumping her a day before her birthday, Tony Romo has found him a new piece. Us Magazine reports:
The Dallas Cowboys quarterback, 29, is dating Chace Crawford’s little sister, Candice, a 22-year-old beauty queen who looks strikingly similar to Romo’s ex Jessica Simpson, a source close to Romo confirms toUsmagazine.com. “She’s not happy that it’s out [in the media], but they weren’t trying to hide,” a source close to Candice tells Usthe day after CelebTV.com first reported the coupling. “They’ve gone out to dinner in Dallas a bunch.”

This blonde is way hotter, so sorry Dallas fans. Tony Romo is completely baffled and confused on the field during the playoffs anyway, and he looked like a caveman who was just teleported to Six Flags whenever Jessica Simpson was in the stands, so you can probably imagine what’s gonna happen now. More than likely an incomplete pass, but there’s a strong possibility he might try to light the ball on fire and launch it with a catapult.

Chace Crawford is in Gossip Girl. So are Blake Lively’s tits:

Related Posts:

Tags: , ,