If Warner Brothers wants any continuity to their DC universe that they've created, and if they want to be true to the source material that Zack Synder claims the Man of Steel sequel will be based (The Dark Knight Returns graphic novel), then it would make sense that Batman would be the older, even more crazy vigilante who fights crime now with an AK-47 and a heating pad for his back. With that said, then of course they should cast an older actor. BatmanOnFilm says that's the case and these are the rumored names to take over the role.
BatmanOnFilm has been working around the clock to get more details on this movie. And according to that site’s sources (stating it’s more than one and less than ten unnamed people), an older actor will be targeted to play the Dark Knight. So it means that Joseph Gordon-Levitt is definitely out if this rumor is true. And the site stated a few names, including Josh Duhamel, Jude Law, Gerard Butler, Josh Brolin, Jon Hamm, Brad Pitt, Ben Affleck and Jim Caviezel.
Whoa, Jon Hamm as Batman? A millions vaginas just screamed out then fell silent because the women they were attached to just slid off their chairs.
A week after Angelina Jolie voluntarily had a double mastecomy to decrease her chances of getting breast cancer that seems to love her family, her aunt died of the same disease. But Angelina has new boobs now and her husband had a premiere, so she didn't go to her aunt's funeral. In her defense, her aunt is dead and wouldn't even know if Angelina was there or not, so you can see how this was an easy choice. And as you can see, Brad Pitt seems pretty pleased about the whole thing, because even if she had pictures of boobs as her new boobs, Brad Pitt would just point to her lips and say "I'm good." Then he'd touch them and ejaculate in his pants. Then they'd both laugh and Angelina would do that thing where you make your hand into the shape of a gun then wink.
After the release date being pushed back six months, the film adaption of Max Brooks’ insanely awesome book about a worldwide zombie apocalypse, World War Z, finally has a trailer. Initial reaction: It’s nothing like the book. Second reaction: Zombies don’t respect each others’ personal space. Not at all. Not one bit.
Based on Max Brooks’ best-selling novel “World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War,” the story revolves around United Nations employee Gerry Lane (Pitt), who traverses the world in a race against time to stop the Zombie pandemic that is toppling armies and governments and threatening to decimate humanity itself. Enos plays Gerry’s wife Karen Lane; Kertesz is his comrade in arms, Segen. The film is directed by Marc Forster from a screenplay written by Matthew Michael Carnahan, and Damon Lindelof.
The “Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie could get married at any moment” rumors have been going on for the last few months, so much so that Jennifer Aniston has finally given up and decided to marry Justin Theroux. But Pitt was in London for a screening last night and was asked about it. You can tell they smoke a lot of weed. Radar Online reports:
The rumor mill has been in overdrive that Pitt, 48, and Jolie, 37, are readying their South of France estate for an intimate ceremony, but Brad was quick to shoot down those claims. At the Mayfair Hotel screening for Killing Them Softy, he said, “No plans yet. Other than, we’re gonna do it,” when quizzed if a date was decided for the big day.
Later, when Jennifer Aniston was asked about her wedding, she said, “No plans yet. Other than, we’re gonna do it. Why? Did Brad mention me? What did he say? Not that I care or anything. Did he say I was pretty? I’m wearing a new dress. Did he say he liked it? He’s probably just too shy to tell me. But seriously, did he say anything? Do you know what hotel he’s in? Is he on the ground floor? Do you have a crowbar? What? Hahaha, oh no. I’m just asking for a friend.”
Click here to see arial shots of Brad and Angelina’s estate in the South of France. Then look around your shitty apartment. If you squint hard enough you can pretend.
So why this show of commitment now? Brad and Angelina always said they wouldn’t get married until gay marriage was legal, but then their kids are too young to understand the complex realities surrounding basic civil rights. So the official word is they are doing this because the (more…)
If there are any 14-year old dudes reading this site and you’re at school today thinking you’re an uncoordinated dork who’ll never get laid, have faith. Because here’s Brad Pitt at 14 in 1977 posing for a team picture for the Cherokee Rejects in Springfield, Missouri. Apparently his go to play was to clap his hands and dance whenever he saw someone eating a Berries and Cream Starburst. Flash forward 20 years later, and Moses couldn’t part the sea of pussy waiting to jump on his dick. Then Angelina Jolie agreed to let him not pull out. So, relax. It gets better.
“Ok, Jennifer. You really need to stop calling me like this. I told you, my dad’s busy. Look, I gotta go. I have Joseph Kony on the other line for my sister.”
I realize the bumper sticker on the back of your SUV says that you’re proud parent of a terrific kid, but your kid’s parents aren’t Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and they don’t get to walk a giant bulldog around New Orleans with a bodyguard so they probably want you to take that shit off. Gawd, why do you have to be so embarrassing all time? What the hell is wrong with you?!
Brad Pitt didn’t win Best Actor for Moneyball, but I actually feel for bad for the other guys nominated in this category who didn’t win. Mostly because they didn’t get head from Angelina Jolie on the way home.
Oh, Brad you sly dog! Having unprotected sex with the woman you’ve been in a committed relationship with for six years! Hahaha, you’re still full of surprises, bro! OK Magazine reports:
Lately, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have dropped some none-too-subtle hints that they’d like to add to their brood of six children. The smart money seemed to be on adoption — though Angelina did say recently, “I could end up pregnant.” Turns out she wasn’t toying with us: A source close to the Oscar-winner reveals that Angelina is expecting her seventh child and telling friends she can’t wait to be a mom again. “She’s almost three months along,” the source confirms to OK!. “It’s not something she wants to officially announce but she’s at a point where she is telling a select group of people.” Adds an insider: Angelina is really savoring every moment. she’s having a tough time with morning sickness but says it’s all worth it.”
Let me preface this by saying that this is OK! reporting this, so take it however you want. They reported that Jon Benet Ramsey was pregnant with twins and I had a really big penis once, so they have a well documented history of just making shit up. That being said, if it’s true, fuck you Brad Pitt.
As Paul Mooney once said, Angelina Jolie could bring a live chicken home and say she adopted it and Brad Pitt would jump up and say, “Come here, chicken! I’m your new daddy!”. And this is one of the reasons why. For his 48th birthday, she bought him a waterfall. A WATERFALL.Us Magazine reports:
The In the Land of Blood and Honey director, 36, purchased a waterfall in California for longtime love Brad Pitt, according to The Daily Mail. The grand gesture served as both Pitt’s 48th birthday and Christmas presents. Pitt, who has six children with Jolie, is planning to build a house over the waterfall inspired by his favorite American architect, Frank Lloyd Wright. “Brad has dreamed of a home with the sound of a waterfall cascading under the house,” a source tells the site. “He wants to pull all aspects of nature, light, glass and varying levels into the concept.” “Angelina wanted to get him something incredibly special and, because she knows how much he loves architecture, she thought this would be perfect,” a source tells The Daily Mail. “This is the present to top all presents.”
It’s already been well-documented that Angelina will fuck you anywhere at anytime and she might even ask one of her chick friends to join in. Now after that, instead of getting a sandwich, you get a fucking waterfall. Step your game up, ladies.