Lindsay Lohan Is Basically Putting Hits Out On People Now
Lindsay Lohan Is Basically Putting Hits Out On People Now

 

If you haven't heard by now, Paris Hilton's little brother, Barron Hilton, got his ass kicked outside a Miami mansion over the weekend, and he claims that Lindsay Lohan was the one who ordered the hit. Michael Lohan, who wasn't there, immediately made a statement saying Lindsay wasn't even at the scene and can provide several witnesses to corroborate her alibi. Then, of course, since Michael and Lindsay are suck at lying, there is video footage of Lindsay at the mansion being confronted by Barron. There is also video footage of me from high scool playing the saxophone. Sup, ladies?  TMZ reports:

Paris Hilton's little brother Barron Hilton was jumped this morning — and beaten to a pulp — and he claims Lindsay Lohan masterminded the attack, TMZ has learned. We know Lindsay's denying she ordered the hit — in fact, she claims she wasn't even on the scene at the time of the incident — but now we have video (above) that proves otherwise. It shows Barron (blonde hair, white shirt) and his friends confronting LiLo right after the attack. Multiple sources connected to the situation tell us … Barron attended a party last night at a Miami mansion where Lindsay has been staying while she's in town for an art festival — a party that lasted until well after the sun came up. We're told … during the party, someone accused Barron of talking smack about Lindsay — and a short time later he was attacked and beaten to a pulp. TMZ obtained a photo of the damage. We know … 24-year-old Barron spoke with police following the incident. He claims Lohan orchestrated the beating. Barron told cops Lindsay approached him at the party with a male friend and began screaming, "'You talk sh*t about me to my boyfriend, this is what you get." As the guy proceeded to pummel Barron, Hilton claims Lindsay was laughing and egging him on. Cops were called to the scene and interviewed Barron. We're told Barron doesn't know the identity of his attacker but is adamant Lindsay is the person behind the attack. We spoke to Michael Lohan who insists Lindsay had nothing to do with the attack and had left the mansion BEFORE the fight went down. Michael claims there are several witnesses — including security guards — who will back up Lindsay's alibi. Michael says Lindsay was adamant she didn't want to be around any trouble … i.e. drugs,  alcohol, violence … and even had people removed from the house before the fight ever went down. Problem with that alibi is — the video of Barron nearly face-to-face with Lilo outside the mansion … just moments after the fight.

So to recap, a spoiled, rich kid got beat up at an art festival in Miami by a dude who Lindsay promised he could titty fuck her and split her garbage bag of coke if he did. If they wanted me to pick a side here, they probably should have come up with a better scenario.

 

pic source = Instagram


 

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Paris Hilton’s Brother Ran Over Someone, Got a DUI



Barron Hilton, 18, was arrested for DUI in Malibu this morning. TMZ says:

TMZ has learned 18-year-old Barron Hilton, Paris’ little brother, was arrested for DUI in Malibu at 8:30 AM this morning! Cops tell TMZ he was driving a black Mercedes on Pacific Coast Highway with a passenger — not one of his sisters– when he was pulled over at a 76 gas station.
He’s currently in the process of being booked at the Lost Hills Sheriff’s station — the same place Mel Gibson was taken….Barron’s been officially booked and is currently being held on $5000 bail.”

Uh, 8:30 in the morning?? Is he training on some Olympic drinking team that no one knows about? It better be something big, because it’s gonna take a lot to fill his sister’s shoes (no, seriously). Unless he was drinking at a daycare or they found Natalee Holloway in his trunk, it’s pretty safe to say that Paris has the market cornered on embarrassing the Hilton family.

Outlook not good update: Page Six says Barron Hilton allegedly hit Fernando Tellez, a worker at the 76 gas station Hilton drove into, with his car, knocking him to the ground. Tellez said: “The Mercedes lost control as it was turning into the gas station and Barron got out of the car and he was totally drunk and couldn’t walk straight.” Bystanders complimented Tellez on his English.

Update: Here’s Barron Hilton’s mugshot.

(credit: TMZ)

Paris falling out of her training bra on Friday night:

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