SoBe Missed One

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An unreleased picture from Ashley Greene’s anti-erectile dysfunction SoBe ad has hit online today, and I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but she might have to lift up a little bit if she wants my face under there. But she can relax after that. I haven’t eaten today and I brought a bib, so we should be good.

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Ashley Greene’s Nipple Is Artistic



My future ex-wife and future 2025 Twilight Fan Convention panel member at the Duluth Radisson, Ashley Greene, apparently only poses for ads if almost naked, so that works out pretty well for me. Because you see, I would pound her vagina like a can of PBR. That’s way more romantic than it sounds, by the way. Especially when I light some candles and set an ambient mood. Chicks like that. Whatever. I’m just trying to fuck you not have a seance.

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Ashley Greene Is Naked, Vitamin Enriched



I know I posted some of these pictures of Ashley Greene with only bodypaint covering her hot naked ass in an ad for SoBe yesterday, but my penis sent me an angry text message from the next room and told me it might be a good idea if I posted them all today. He really wants to have sex with her, but he just gets so shy. I tell him that chicks like confidence, but he’s just so unsure of himself. Why just last night when I was going to sleep, he could barely touch the ceiling. He blames himself, and I just don’t know what to say to him anymore. No one is gonna love him until he first learns to love himself.

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