Anna Paquin Is Pregnant

Because in Hollywood, meeting at a read table and pretending you’re in love means you’re in love for real, True Blood co-stars Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer starting dating while filming the pilot, got married in 2010, and now are having a baby. Radar Online reports:

True Blood co-stars and real-life lovers Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer are expecting their first child together! It will be the first child for the couple together, who tied the knot in August 2010 after a year-long engagement.

Congratulations. Hey, when something feels right and it’s what you want, it really doesn’t matter how you got there or how fast it took to get there. That’s why I’m in line right now for a Double Quarter Pounder meal. I bet I’ll get the first one!

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The Emmys Were Last Night

The 62nd Annual Emmy Awards honored the best in television last night by handing out trophies to millionaires who stand on an X and read words on paper for a living, but unfortunately for them, NFL preseason football and True Blood were on last night, too. Basically what I’m saying is, I Googled all this shit.

Sookie and Bill showed up to their first event as a married couple, and I don’t know how many presents they got at the reception, but hopefully they registered at a dentist’s office.

Only kindergartners and Asian girls should have bangs, so of course Emily Deschanel looks weird. She’s in a show called Bones I’ve never seen, but if I had to guess, I’d say it’s about her jaw being replaced with the Iron Giant’s.

Christina Hendricks once again used alien technology and Mayan spells to push her massive rack up to her neck, so we’d be distracted and forget about everything else. She lost in the supporting actress category, and in more bad news, her husband lost a call before he got the customer’s service tag. Poor guys!

January Jones is clearly the hottest one on Mad Men, plus she’s slutty and likes to drive drunk then text married guys. The only thing that would make her more perfect is if her anus took debit cards.

She was annoying as hell last season Dexter, so I guess that’s why in the season finale Julie Benz bled out in a bathtub. But according to these pictures, her nipples are very, very much alive.

Who the hell knows why Kim Kardashian was there. She looks like something on a black escort website that would come to your door if you ordered the Cleopatra.

Eva Amurri has a face only her mother Susan Sarandon could love, but like her mother, she has these (NSFW). Every kid in Haiti could get free lunch for a year with these two.

Tina Fey also showed up in a dress almost as confusing as the reasons people think she’s attractive. She looks like the Greek goddess of concealer.

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Sookie And Bill Got Married Last Night

True Blood stars Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer wed Saturday evening at a private residence in Malibu, Calif., has confirmed… Paquin, 28, and Moyer, 40, exchanged their vows beneath a tent across the street from the beach.

I might be the only person not watching this damn show and with all the questions I’ve gotten about it on Formspring and requests for pictures of the male cast in the comments section, I really think I’m going to rent season one ASAP. Sex, murder, and blood are all elements of a typical Sunday for me anyway, so why not add a tv show to that? Oh yeah, and congratulations to the happy couple! May your marriage outlast the annulment deadline.

By extremely popular demand, I give you the men of True (more…)

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Eric (Alexander Skarsgård), Sookie (Anna Paquin) and Bill (Stephen Moyer) are on the cover of Rolling Stone, and if you’re not watching True Blood, just go ahead and stake yourself in the balls because you’re missing the best thing on television. I heard Edward Cullen watched an episode of True Blood one time and he got so scared he had to change his tampon.

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True Blood is Vampire Porn

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When Anne Rice isn’t turning them into effeminate metros and Stephanie Meyers isn’t making them sensitive, misunderstood gaywads, vampires are generally pretty kick ass. They sleep, they drink blood, and they sometimes teach kids simple mathematical concepts through their addiction to counting. That’s why True Blood is one of the best shows on television. Vampire Bill is equal parts Louis and Leatherface, an enamored protector and a crazed, vicious killer. Oh, and he had sex with Anna Paquin in last night’s season premiere. I’m not really sure how that works out since his penis probably feels like a frozen Push-Pop, but hey, whatever. These pictures might as well be of Anna Paquin having sex with Batman or the orangutan from Shirt Tales. You know, or something else that doesn’t exist.

You can see the NSFW pics HERE, but be warned, Anna Paquin is completely naked. Also be warned of bears. Keep food well away from tent and kayaks; preferably 12 feet off the ground at least 100 feet away.

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Anna Paquin is Naked

HBO’s True Blood is so kick ass, that even a naked Anna Paquin can’t ruin its awesomeness. I mean, don’t get me wrong, she’s not necessarily ugly, but doesn’t SAG have a dental plan? Every time I watch this show, I’m always waiting for her to start building a dam. I even wrote HBO about this, because quite frankly, it’s a little distracting.

Anna Paquin has 120-year old vampire sex (click lips for NSFW pics):

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