Taylor Swift Isn’t Passive Aggressive At All

Hey, remember this dress that Taylor Swift looked kinda hot in at the 2013 AMAs on Sunday? As it turns out, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley looked very hot in the same dress when she grinded on Harry Style's lap during a Glamour photoshoot this summer. E! News reports:

Taylor Swift made for one very glam golden girl at Sunday night's 2013 American Music Awards in her Julien Macdonald mini dress, but she wasn't the first leggy lady to rock the sexy look. Yep, before Swift walked the red carpet at the annual awards show in the glittering design, model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley stunned in the teeny-weeny number—with Swift's ex, no less! The British babe posed alongside Tay-Tay's former flame Harry Styles and the rest of the One Direction boys in the pages of Glamour's August 2013 issue in the strapless metallic number. Huntington-Whitely flaunted her cleavage with the frock's plunging neckline, but the singer took a more modest route, having a sheer illusion lining added that was sure to aid in the prevention of any unwanted wardrobe malfunctions.

Man what are the odds that Taylor Swift would wear the Puritan version of the dress that Harry Styles went home and masturbated to at the same event where she was sure Styles would see her? The only problem with Taylor Swift's master plan is that Rosie Huntington-Whiteley's body look like THIS. Taylor Swift's body looks like Rosie Huntington-Whiteley's body after it's been donated to science for two weeks.

 

 

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Miley Cyrus Performed With A Giant, Blinking Cat Last Night

Because she's dumb. Miley Cyrus performed "Wrecking Ball" at the 2013 AMAs last night with a giant cat that blinked and lip synched. You can watch the video below, or you can just assume the blank, vacant stare in the cat's eyes is because he was forced to stare at Miley's ass the whole time. Come on, bro. Nobody needs to see that.

 

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Taylor Swift Won The 2013 AMAs

I puked five times last night so I only caught the last hour of the 2013 American "Music" Awards, but it doesn't really matter, because all you really need to know about the state of the music industry is that Taylor Swift won a bunch of shit including Artist Of The Year. Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift won Artist Of The Year. I can't stress enough that Taylor Swift won Artist Of The Year. She should also win some kind of award for being the only tall, rich, blonde with fantastic legs that men run away from like they're being chased by a werewolf. Taylor Swift now has fourteen AMAs, so I don't know where she keeps them all. I would say she could put them in her vagina, but that's where she keeps her heart.

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