Tori Spelling Has Ebola Maybe By todd October 20, 2014

Tori Spelling couldn’t get a call back for Sharknado 2, so this is probably the best PR she’s had in a while.

Sources tell us Tori was running a fever, coughing uncontrollably, and having trouble breathing … when she was taken to Cedars Sinai Hospital. We’re told Tori was quarantined from other patients, and medical staff took precautions while treating her. While it sounds scary … we’re told it’s NOT Ebola — but instead Tori was admitted for a severe case of bronchitis with a sinus infection. Doctors are running blood tests, and a lung specialist is going to check out her bronchitis. We’re told Tori had to cancel a scheduled press tour for the 2nd season of her reality show.

I mean, we’ll all have Ebola eventually, but if we’re making a list of who dies before me, can we get some people who I didn’t think were already dead? I think the world would be a better place without the cast of Big Bang Theory, no?

Tori Spelling couldn’t get a call back for Sharknado 2, so this is probably the best PR she’s had in a while. Sources tell us Tori was running a fever,…

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Jena Malone Is Robin In ‘Batman v. Superman’ By todd October 20, 2014

Zack Snyder ruins everythingso not only did he cast a spastic AV nerd as one of the greatest villains of all time in Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice, he’s also adding Robin.

“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” will reportedly feature a female Robin, with actress Jena Malone rumored to be playing Carrie Kelly, according to a local news station in Detroit. WILX-10 News station reporter Kirk Montgomery spoke with one of the extras at Michigan State University, where a scene involving Bruce Wayne (Ben Affleck) and Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg) was being filmed this week. “I’ve also learned that the character of Robin is now female,” he said alluding to the film’s top secret script. Warner Bros. declined to comment. Malone, who appeared in “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire,” has been seen on the WB set and recent movie premieres sporting a new red hairdo.

This movie is supposedly heavily influenced by Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns, and in that, Robin is apparently a ginger named “Carrie”. Unsure if her getting her first period or going to the prom will be a plot point or not, but do we really need a Robin? I don’t even care that Robin is a girl, because Robin is a chick’s name anyway and Robin wears booty shorts and a tiny cape, but why am I even getting upset over this? I feel like I typed too much about this.

Zack Snyder ruins everything,  so not only did he cast a spastic AV nerd as one of the greatest villains of all time in Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice,…

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Justin Bieber Is Banging Barbara Pavlin Because He Loves Selena Gomez By todd October 20, 2014

 The world is an unjust and lawless place and whoever made it should unplug it and plug it back in, because Justin Bieber is banging Victoria’s Secret model Barbara Pavlin when he’s not dickmatizing Selena Gomez.

 Justin Bieber is desperate to get Selena Gomez back, but we learned EXCLUSIVELY that Justin is hooking up with Victoria’s Secret model Barbara Palvin again. The love saga between Justin Bieber, 20, and Selena Gomez, 22, continues. Justin has made many sweet attempts to win her back, but a source reveals to HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY that Justin is hooking back up with former flame Barbara Palvin, 21, to spark some fire into Selena! “Right now, he’s hooking him back up with Barbara Palvin,” a source dished to HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY. “They been talking again. Justin is pissed that Selena is ignoring him and he knows that would hurt her, so he’s all for it anything he can do to get her attention and if it’s not good attention then he’ll go for bad attention.” As of late, Justin has been trying everything to get back together with Selena. From flaunting his sexy abs on Instagram to reaching out to her family, Justin’s not afraid to show how he feels.

So to recap, Justin Bieber is having sex with Barbara Pavlin because he wants Selena Gomez back. Man, that’s real love right there. Not sure how Selena will be able to ignore such a grand romantic gesture. Also, if I’m banging Barbara Pavlin, I wouldn’t even remember how to spell “Selena”.

 

 The world is an unjust and lawless place and whoever made it should unplug it and plug it back in, because Justin Bieber is banging Victoria’s Secret model Barbara Pavlin…

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Why? By todd October 20, 2014

 

For some reason, the CDC and Obama haven’t shut down flights to stop on Miley Cyrus‘ Bangerz tour, because it’s all part of a plan to cause mass panic and institute martial law, so the world will be infected with Miley Cyrus’ music and socialist Illumnati space lizards can make money off the vaccine while taking your guns and freedoms. See? That’s how stupid you sound on Facebook right now.

  For some reason, the CDC and Obama haven’t shut down flights to stop on Miley Cyrus‘ Bangerz tour, because it’s all part of a plan to cause mass panic…

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Emily Ratajkowski Is Topless, Links By todd October 20, 2014
Emily Ratajkowski Is Topless, Links

 

Xander from  Buffy The Vampire Slayer got arrested  [Dlisted]

Paris Hilton is now a brunette. That’s hot  [Fishwrapper]

Iggy Azalea has a massive camel toe (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Kelly Brook is not single anymore, wears these shorts  [The Superficial]

Miley Cyrus’ Bangerz touris still mostly her non-existent ass [Hollywood Tuna]

Blake Lively is all legs [Popoholic]

Vanessa Hudgens has grown a butt [Drunken Stepfather]

Peyton Manning is the NFL’s all-time passing TD leader [Hollywood Life]

Justin Theroux has been engaged to Jennifer Aniston since 2012, won’t discuss wedding plans with her [Celebitchy]

Melissa Howe behind the scenes for Playboy   [Moe Jackson]

Joanna Kupra is hot as hell  [Celebslam]

  Xander from  Buffy The Vampire Slayer got arrested  [Dlisted] Paris Hilton is now a brunette. That’s hot  [Fishwrapper] Iggy Azalea has a massive camel toe (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver…

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Ashley Greene Did Women’s Health By todd October 17, 2014
Ashley Greene Did Women’s Health

 

 Ashley Greene hasn’t been on here in a while, so we need to changer all that, because she’s hot and Charlie Sheen and Joan Rivers are not hot. She is in next month’s Women’s Health where she’s talking about her exercise routine that still obviously take into account she has a butt. Ashley, I love you, I do, but please do some squats. Pretty please.

 

 

   Ashley Greene hasn’t been on here in a while, so we need to changer all that, because she’s hot and Charlie Sheen and Joan Rivers are not hot. She…

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Charlie Sheen Is SIngle By todd October 17, 2014
Charlie Sheen Is SIngle

 

Charlie Sheen was about to make a porn star his fourth wife, because “fourth wife” and “porn star” are solid foundations and what the founders of marriage had in mind when they promised their daughter’s virginity in exchange for lands and/or goats. And if she was virgin and hot, sometimes they got both. Land and goats! What a great deal! Also, he’s not getting married anymore!

Charlie Sheen started off the year by tweeting that he had married Brett Rossi, otherwise known as his girlfriend Scotty, in Iceland. He was just kidding. But he has been engaged to her and the two were planning to tie the knot before the end of the year.Not anymore. The engagement is off. “Scotty and I had a great year together as we traveled the world and crossed a lot of things off our bucket list,” he says in a statement to Gossip Cop. “She’s a terrific gal — but we’ve mutually decided to go our separate ways and not spend the rest of our lives together.”

The “rest of our lives together” sounds great, but Charlie Sheen is 49, so he’ll be dead pretty soon, so why not just bang other porn stars instead without having to support them financially? I feel this is a better business practice than the goats thing.

 

  Charlie Sheen was about to make a porn star his fourth wife, because “fourth wife” and “porn star” are solid foundations and what the founders of marriage had in…

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Joan Rivers Died From A Lot Of Big Words By todd October 17, 2014
Joan Rivers Died From A Lot Of Big Words

 

Hey, remember when Joan Rivers died? People were sad. Kids who get words from autopsy results at a Spelling Bee will also be sad because wtf.

“OCME [Office of the Chief Medical Examiner] has completed its investigation,” reads the statement from spokeswoman Julie Bolcer. “The cause of Ms. Rivers’ death is anoxic encephalopathy due to hypoxic arrest during laryngoscopy and upper gastrointestinal endoscopy with propofol sedation for evaluation of voice changes and gastroesophageal reflux disease. The manner of death is therapeutic complication. The classification of a death as a therapeutic complication means that the death resulted from a predictable complication of medical therapy.”

Long story short, her brain ran out of oxygen. WebMD says that’s bad. Since her heard was mostly Play-Doh and calk, the doctor performing the procedure was unprepared, so she died. But she was 81 so whatever. What? You wanna live forever, bitch?

 

  Hey, remember when Joan Rivers died? People were sad. Kids who get words from autopsy results at a Spelling Bee will also be sad because wtf. “OCME [Office of…

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Amy Jane Brand Says Good Morning, Links By todd October 17, 2014
Amy Jane Brand Says Good Morning, Links

 

Jude Law has five kids now [Dlisted]

Lorde took a selfie. Doesn’t look 45. [Fishwrapper]

Ashley Greene is really cold in her new movie (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Robin Thicke is rebounding with Leo DiCaprio  [The Superficial]

Kelly Brook still has giant boobs [Hollywood Tuna]

Gigi Hadid is all kinds of hot [Popoholic]

Jason Biggs pissed in Chelsea Handler’s face [Drunken Stepfather]

This really sucked  [Hollywood Life]

Dane Cook is still a douche [Celebitchy]

Selena Gomez should always wear this   [Moe Jackson]

Chanelle Hayes has the hugest of racks [Celebslam]

  Jude Law has five kids now [Dlisted] Lorde took a selfie. Doesn’t look 45. [Fishwrapper] Ashley Greene is really cold in her new movie (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]…

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Adrianne Curry Got Naked On Instagram Finally By todd October 16, 2014
Adrianne Curry Got Naked On Instagram Finally

 

We all knew it was only a matter of time before Adrianne Curry took all her clothes then took a picture then posted it somewhere, so I’m happy she did it today, because as we’ve all seen, today has been missionary sex while there’s a load of laundry in the dryer. Anyway, you can see the NSFW pic here. Not sure what’s up with her spine, though. I hope she gets that checked out.

  We all knew it was only a matter of time before Adrianne Curry took all her clothes then took a picture then posted it somewhere, so I’m happy she…

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