Kate Upton Wants Smaller Boobs. Lies. By todd April 14, 2014
Kate Upton Wants Smaller Boobs. Lies.

 

This is like Beyonce saying she wants her legs amputated. You see what I'm saying here? It just…makes no sense.

The grass is always greener. Kate Upton, the world-famous supermodel who's well-known for her voluptuous assets, said in a recent interview that she wishes her breasts were smaller. "I wish I had smaller boobs every day of my life as I would love to wear spaghetti tops braless or go for the smallest bikini designs," the buxom blonde bombshell, 21, told British publication The Sun on Sunday, April 13. "Every single day I'm like, 'Oh man, it would be so much easier,' especially if people didn't constantly bring them up," the Vogue cover girl added. "If I could just take them off like they were clip-ons…" The two-time consecutive Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover model continued to express her dismay over her busty body. "I know I say I wish I had smaller boobs," she shared, "and that's true because at least twice a day I wish that.

Women logic, brah. If they have big boobs, they want smaller boobs. If they have small boobs, they want implants. If they have straight hair, they want curly hair. If they have curly hair, they get it straightened. If they have a big ass, they want a smaller one. If they say everything is fine, everything is not fine. Women, I love you, I do, I really do, but you guys always know exactly what you want. The problem is, you have no idea what that is. Unless it's wine or tequila. Always wine and tequila. But, like, if Kate Upton wants to go braless, then what's stopping her? Just unhook it. I can do it with both hands in like ten minutes. Not to brag, but I'm pretty good at it.

  This is like Beyonce saying she wants her legs amputated. You see what I'm saying here? It just…makes no sense. The grass is always greener. Kate Upton, the world-famous…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Here’s Some People Who Went To Coachella By todd April 14, 2014

I'm almost positive the tweakers at Coachella crashed Instagram this weekend leaving girls who took pictures of their thighs at the pool to be so done over having to wait to post them. So, if you haven't seen enough Coachella pics yet, hey, here's some more. Wow! How exciting!

I'm almost positive the tweakers at Coachella crashed Instagram this weekend leaving girls who took pictures of their thighs at the pool to be so done over having to wait…

Related Posts:

Tags: , , , , ,
Ashley Benson Was McDonald’s Official Corporate Whore At Coachella By todd April 14, 2014
Ashley Benson Was McDonald’s Official Corporate Whore At Coachella

Ashly Benson Coachella

 

Seen here not even attempting to pretend that she wasn't paid by McDonald's to attend Coachella, Ashley Benson deep throated the golden arches the entire weekend. She couldn't have hooked up with Moe's? I would have respected her more.

 

source = she's lovin' it

  Seen here not even attempting to pretend that she wasn't paid by McDonald's to attend Coachella, Ashley Benson deep throated the golden arches the entire weekend. She couldn't have…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Here’s Leonardo DiCaprio Dancing At Coachella By todd April 14, 2014
Here’s Leonardo DiCaprio Dancing At Coachella

 

Leonardo DiCaprio wanted to remain anonymous at Coachella and this video of him dancing is probably why. He'd look more coordinated if he walked into a downed power line.

 

 

pic source = this person

  Leonardo DiCaprio wanted to remain anonymous at Coachella and this video of him dancing is probably why. He'd look more coordinated if he walked into a downed power line….

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
A Moment With Anastasia Ashley By todd April 11, 2014
A Moment With Anastasia Ashley

 

Anastasia Ashley was basically created in a lab solely to wear a bikini year round and now it's almost summer…wait, hold up. Who is Frank? Oh, ok. I see how it is. What? Nothing. I'm fine. Don't even worry about it.

  Anastasia Ashley was basically created in a lab solely to wear a bikini year round and now it's almost summer…wait, hold up. Who is Frank? Oh, ok. I see…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Taylor Swift Is Very Specific By todd April 11, 2014

Taylor Swift's love life should really be a reality show, because I'd watch the hell out of that shit. Also, I'd like to see her legs in HD more. Anyway, she's apparently not looking to date anymore until she finds a guy that meets her new list of requirements. Wanna know what they are? Sure you do. What else do you have going on in your life? I mean, you're reading this site for chrissakes.

“She’s all about finding a new boyfriend but she doesn’t want just any guy, she wants the perfect guy. She’s made a really detailed list of what she wants and it’s so intense, there aren’t many guys out there that can live up to it,” the source reveals. “She wants someone on her level when it comes to their career, plus, they have to be hot — like leading man hot. And she would love a guy that can speak at least two languages,” the source adds. We applaud Taylor for knowing what she wants but we’re not so sure it’s a great idea to rule a guy out just because he lacks a second language. So cute! Our source reveals that Taylor has even thought about what she wants her guy’s family to be like. “There are simple things on the list too,” the source says. “She wants a guy that has at least one sister because she thinks it will make him a better boyfriend. He has to have a good relationship with his parents, especially his mom, but he can’t be a mama’s boy. Like I said, it is very detailed and it goes on and on. Her friends think she needs to chill. They think being so picky is just going to keep her single.”

Say what you want about Taylor Swift, but there's something to be said for knowing what you want and not settling until you get it. More people should do the same. If that means she has to go through a bunch of dicks to find the one that fits the best, the more power to her. I used to date a half-Chinese chick and I always felt like I had to get my penis surgically removed. Not the best of fits. Not that I have anything against Chinese people. I really like their food and movies. Look, I'm not racist, okay? I have a Chinese friend. He fixed my laptop once.

Taylor Swift's love life should really be a reality show, because I'd watch the hell out of that shit. Also, I'd like to see her legs in HD more. Anyway,…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Hilary Duff Isn’t Getting Divorced Now By todd April 11, 2014

"Whew."- Mike Comrie's penis.

After spending a romantic Valentine’s Day vacation together in the Bahamas, Hilary Duff is calling off the divorce with hubby Mike Comrie, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.  According to an insider, the mid-February trip was intended to be a time for the couple to discuss splitting assets and a suitable custody arrangement for their 2-year-old son, Luca — but the two have instead agreed to work on their marriage. “Hilary and Mike hooked up when they were in the Bahamas,” the source told Radar.

It's always good when a couple can look past what drove them apart to see what made them fall in love in the first place, so hey, good for them. I really have nothing else to add except somebody might want to go check on Aaron Carter. Like, for real. Did you knock on the door? He's not answering? Shit.

"Whew."- Mike Comrie's penis. After spending a romantic Valentine’s Day vacation together in the Bahamas, Hilary Duff is calling off the divorce with hubby Mike Comrie, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting. …

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Jill Duggar Is Ready To Be A Brood Mare By todd April 11, 2014
Jill Duggar Is Ready To Be A Brood Mare

 

Despite never having kissed or spent one single moment alone with her fiance, Derick Dillard, Jill Duggar is ready to turn her womb into a factory for Jesus as soon as possible.

"Both of us want as many kids as God will give us," Duggar, 22, told ABC News,….The oldest daughter and fourth child of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar announced her engagement to Dillard, 25, on Wednesday, April 9. "My parents have kept popping them out so we'll see how [our] fertility is!" she quipped.

Yay, religion! This chick is 22 and will never have an orgasm in her life, because on God's PPV channel, sex is just a perfunctory act designed to increase his market share through competitive breeding. Ready to spout off that God commanded them to "be fruitful and multiply", they forget that was said when, you, Kim Jong God wiped out every person on Earth. There's almost 7 billion people here now. Chill. But religion relies on a closed information system and faith that God will help you not think for yourself. If you're Catholic, you can't use birth control, and when you have the kid, you have to baptize it before it's brain is fully formed, and if you don't, you're a mortal sinner. If you're a Bible-thumping Christian, you can't marry a non-believer or believe anything you read in a science textbook, because that might somehow awaken you from your shared psychosis. Entering a "relationship" with Jesus means the free flow of information only flows one way, and if you believe anything different then you'll burn in an eternal fire. Sounds great, huh? Anyway, Jill Duggar's uterus is gonna fall out soon. Happy Friday.

 
  Despite never having kissed or spent one single moment alone with her fiance, Derick Dillard, Jill Duggar is ready to turn her womb into a factory for Jesus as…
Tags: