Amy-Jane Brand Says Good Morning, Links By todd April 23, 2014
Amy-Jane Brand Says Good Morning, Links

Amy-Jane Brand Instagram

 

Amber Heard is dressing like Johnny Depp now  [Dlisted]

Khloe Kardashian got jokes [Fishwrapper]

Mel B has a wedgie (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Jay Z and Beyonce aren't attending Kim and Kanye's wedding   [The Superficial]

Sammy Braddy in lingerie  [Hollywood Tuna]

Emmy Rossum is all legs [Popoholic]

Scarlett Johansson does full labia in Under The Skin (VERY NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]

Selena Gomez deleted everyone from Instagram [Celebitchy]

Nina Agdal continues to be flawless  [Moe Jackson]

Quentin Tarantino's new movie will be shot in 70mm [Film Drunk]

Bella Thorne smoked out at Coachella [Celebslam]

Animals that don't suck  [The Chive]

 

pic source = Instagram

  Amber Heard is dressing like Johnny Depp now  [Dlisted] Khloe Kardashian got jokes [Fishwrapper] Mel B has a wedgie (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie] Jay Z and Beyonce aren't…
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Donna Says She’s Not Dating Tom Cruise By todd April 22, 2014
Donna Says She’s Not Dating Tom Cruise

 

Xenu will kill you for this. Not fast, but oh so slowly.

"The thing that sucks is that there's so much false data because people are in mystery as to what Scientology is, so they just kind of make up stuff," Prepon said. "It's kind of unfortunate because then I have to be like, 'No, that's actually not what's happening.'" "It's just so funny that, when people don't know, they just make stuff up, [like], apparently I'm dating Tom Cruise right now. And apparently he doesn't want me doing the show because I portray a lesbian and I'm a Scientologist. This is false; where are they even getting this stuff? It's unbelievable to me."

Laura Prepon has to explain Scientology, because like all religions, shit just doesn't make any sense. An alien warlock bombed a volcano? Cool. Sorry, gotta run. God killed his son on Friday and he rose three days later except he rose on Sunday? Isn't that, like, two days? My math might not be right, but I think that's two days. That's definitely two days. It's hard to take you seriously when your myth relies on fuzzy math. Anyway, Laura Prepon didn't really say she's not dating Tom Cruise, so they might be. Or they might not be. Why are you even worried about it? Go do something productive with your day.

  Xenu will kill you for this. Not fast, but oh so slowly. "The thing that sucks is that there's so much false data because people are in mystery as…

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This Is Taylor Swift In A Bikini By todd April 22, 2014
This Is Taylor Swift In A Bikini

 

Taylor Swift posted this pic on Instagram yesterday, and as much as I'm a fan of her legs, I'm not really a big fan of seeing every vertebra of her spine. I want to have sex with you, I'm not a first year med student. I have a t-shirt you can wear if reverse cowgirl is your thing.

  Taylor Swift posted this pic on Instagram yesterday, and as much as I'm a fan of her legs, I'm not really a big fan of seeing every vertebra of…

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Kristen Bell Got Naked For Allure By todd April 22, 2014
Kristen Bell Got Naked For Allure

 

Allure's annual Nudes Issue is out, and it features Kristen Bell, Minnie Driver, Nia Long, and a pregnant Jenna Dewan. Wow, what an all-star lineup. I wish I could get excited about this, but my penis is watching Sportscenter. He's really concerned about the Golden State Warriors in this series going forward.

  Allure's annual Nudes Issue is out, and it features Kristen Bell, Minnie Driver, Nia Long, and a pregnant Jenna Dewan. Wow, what an all-star lineup. I wish I could…

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Jon Hamm Annihilated Justin Bieber By todd April 22, 2014
Jon Hamm Annihilated Justin Bieber

 

Jon Hamm is on the cover of the May issue of Men's Fitness, and inside, he discusses his life, Mad blah blah blah blah he just called Justin Bieber a "shithead".

“Look at Bieber or whoever,” he says. “You’re like, ‘What the f**k, man? What are you doing? Why?’ There’s no one telling those people no, and it’s a shame.” What young celebs like that really need, Hamm says, “is a mom or a dad or a really good friend who can say, ‘Hey, sh**head!’ You see people in the world and you’re like, ‘Do you know how a washing machine works? Do you know how to wash a dish? Life skills are something we’re missing. “There used to be a class that kids had to take in high school called home economics, which was cooking and sewing and just s**t you needed to learn in life.” Bieber isn’t the only person Hamm takes aim at — and he’s not afraid to get political. He believes in success, and notes “this weird backlash” against being ambitious and upwardly mobile in America. “It’s this Sarah Palin kind of conversation where they’re like, ‘Oh, the elites,’” he says. “It’s become a thing to just aspire to be a regular person. No, actually, you should desire to be better.”

He kinda lost me at we all need to learn how to sew, but yeah, instead of teaching algebra and chemistry and other stuff most people will never think about again after they graduate high school, how about teach a class that teaches kids how to be decent human being. Let's have Empathy 101 and How Not To Be A Dick: The Science Of Making Friends And Forming Lasting Relationships. Or a class that makes students understand the world doesn't revolve around them. You can still do the cooking class, I guess. Just make sure you spend a whole semester on tacos.

 

  Jon Hamm is on the cover of the May issue of Men's Fitness, and inside, he discusses his life, Mad blah blah blah blah he just called Justin Bieber…

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So…. By todd April 21, 2014

 

I'm not the Instagram Police, but I think we might be able to work something out. What's your schedule like for Thursday? Say around 4ish?

  I'm not the Instagram Police, but I think we might be able to work something out. What's your schedule like for Thursday? Say around 4ish?

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Miley Cyrus Canceled The Rest Of Her US Bangerz Tour By todd April 21, 2014
Miley Cyrus Canceled The Rest Of Her US Bangerz Tour

 

Doctors believe Miley Cyrus had a severe allergic reaction after looking at her tour schedule and seeing "Connecticut".

After cancelling several shows last week, Miley Cyrus has postponed her U.S. tour as she recovers from an allergic reaction to antibiotics. The 21 year-old pop star, according to the Associated Press, will resume her “Bangerz” tour on August 1 in Uniondale, N.Y. The European leg of the tour is still scheduled to kick off May 2 in Amsterdam. Cyrus’ rep said the singer suffered an “an extreme allergic reaction” to the antibiotic cephalexin on Tuesday to treat a sinus infection. The recent cancelled dates are expected to be rescheduled in the near future.

But don't worry, because as the article says, Miley will be completely fine and allergy free in May, because Amsterdam. Man, I wonder what's so special about Amsterdam that made Miley pick that city to resume her tour? Mmm, I'll have to think about that and get back to you on it. Nah, I'm just kidding it's weed. You can blaze really good shit in public there.

  Doctors believe Miley Cyrus had a severe allergic reaction after looking at her tour schedule and seeing "Connecticut". After cancelling several shows last week, Miley Cyrus has postponed her…

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Lea Michele Wears This In Her New Video By todd April 21, 2014

I've never listened to one song Lea Michele intentionally, but apparently she made another one, because here she is shooting the music video for "On My Way". Hopefully it's about one woman's journey to find a bikini that doesn't look as dumb.

I've never listened to one song Lea Michele intentionally, but apparently she made another one, because here she is shooting the music video for "On My Way". Hopefully it's about…

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Terry Richardson Is Pretty Smooth By todd April 21, 2014
Terry Richardson Is Pretty Smooth

 

Much like when you take your first piss at a bar, the seal has been broken on models coming out publicly to say Terry Richardson is a creepy perv and sociopath who offers you shoots if you bang him. This time, it's model Emma Appleton (her). She posted this yesterday, and since that time, she's taken the photo off Instagram and deleted her Twitter account. Richardson's people are already saying this is an obvious fake, because, well, they get paid to say that. Emma Appleton is much better looking than Terry Richardson, so I choose to believe her instead. Hey, man. Don't look at me. I don't make the rules.

 

[h/t Gawker]

  Much like when you take your first piss at a bar, the seal has been broken on models coming out publicly to say Terry Richardson is a creepy perv…

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Candice Swanepoel Had A Happy Easter By todd April 21, 2014
Candice Swanepoel Had A Happy Easter

 

Candice Swanepoel is the closest thing to physical perfection the Earth has to offer, so when she gets naked on Instagram (see NSFW version here), I'm contractually and morally obligated to post it. Why can't this be the body of Christ? I'd eat that. I mean, figuratively of course.

 

pic source = Instagram

  Candice Swanepoel is the closest thing to physical perfection the Earth has to offer, so when she gets naked on Instagram (see NSFW version here), I'm contractually and morally…

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