Ryan Phillippe Really Wants You To Know He’s Not Dating Katy PerryBy toddApril 11, 2017
Ryan Phillippe Really Wants You To Know He’s Not Dating Katy Perry

 

Ryan Phillippe got Reese Witherspoon knocked up in her prime. Then he got the hot one from those Pitch Perfect movies knocked up after like two months. So you can understand why he doesn’t want 32-year old Katy Perry on his vagina resume.

I don’t even know where the rumor came from or how it started, but he seems pretty adamant about not dating Katy Perry. As you know, Katy Perry Googles herself a lot so she responded. 

 

Is Katy trying to flirt here? Do we care about this at all? No? Ok, sorry. Ending this post now.

 

  Ryan Phillippe got Reese Witherspoon knocked up in her prime. Then he got the hot one from those Pitch Perfect movies knocked up after like two months. So you…

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Manny Pacquiao Seems Totally SaneBy toddFebruary 18, 2016
Manny Pacquiao Seems Totally Sane


After having an endorsement with Nike for eight years, Nike has terminated that relationship because Manny Pacquiao apparently doesn’t realize he’s met a gay person before. I mean, he probably hasn’t considering that wrinkled ass suit. Who’s to say, really?

“We find Manny Pacquiao’s comments abhorrent,” the company said in a statement. “Nike strongly opposes discrimination of any kind and has a long history of supporting and standing up for the rights of the LGBT community.”

So what did he say that was so abhorrent? 

“Have you seen any animal having male-to-male or female-to-female relations?” Pacquiao said. “If you have male-to-male or female-to-female [relationships], then people are worse than animals.”

Oh. Yeah, that was pretty fucking abhorrent. A few hours later on Instagram he offered up the typical Christian apology which basically says, “I love you like God loves you but ewww you’re gross and going to hell I’m not judging just saying you’re going to die but I love you and God loves you omg ewww nasty I’m praying for you but please don’t take this as judgmental because I’m getting my info from a book written 2,000 years ago. God bless.” Except, well, he then put another post on Instagram saying gays should be put to death. So, sorry not sorry? I don’t know. I guess now comes the part where you tell me that Nike shouldn’t try to take the moral high ground here since 6-year old Chinese kids make their shoes. Valid point. But I think you’re missing the fact that 6-year old Chinese kids working in sweatshops can’t afford Nikes. Gay people can. I hope that clears up any confusion you might have. Luckily for Christians, this is another luxury suite they can rent out in their Persecution Complex, so be sure to drop more money in the collection plate this week than usual. Your pastor’s kids are asking for some Kyrie 2’s. 

After having an endorsement with Nike for eight years, Nike has terminated that relationship because Manny Pacquiao apparently doesn’t realize he’s met a gay person before. I mean, he probably hasn’t considering…

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Gwyneth Paltrow Was Voted The Most Hated Celebrity In HollywoodBy toddApril 17, 2013

In a poll conducted by Star Magazine, Gwyneth Paltrow was named the Most Hated Celebrity. Why? Because she's completely hateable and an overall vile and pretentious human being who would probably kill herself if she if somebody showed her a picture of a Taco Bell. Anyway, here's the rest of the Top 10.


1. Gwyneth Paltrow
2. Kristen Stewart
3. Jennifer Lopez
4. John Mayer
5. Katherine Heigl
6. Matt Lauer
7. Madonna
8. Justin Bieber
9. Anne Hathaway
10. Kris Jenner

Not sure why Chris Brown or Tom Hanks aren't ranked higher. Especially Tom Hanks. I read a story last week that said he has a farm where he makes Cambodian orphans drown puppies. It was pretty terrible.

 

In a poll conducted by Star Magazine, Gwyneth Paltrow was named the Most Hated Celebrity. Why? Because she's completely hateable and an overall vile and pretentious human being who would…

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Megan Fox Is DefensiveBy toddJuly 08, 2011

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When you’ve obviously had a significant amount of plastic surgery on your face, you want people to know you don’t use botox. I don’t know. I guess that makes as much sense as anything else a woman does. Anyway, Megan Fox uploaded these pics to Facebook under the album “THINGS YOU CAN’T DO WITH YOUR FACE WHEN YOU HAVE BOTOX” (yes, in Kanyewest Bold font). So I guess this means she doesn’t use botox. I mean, that’s great and everything, but all I’m really seeing is a bullseye. Maybe I’m reading too much into this.

When you’ve obviously had a significant amount of plastic surgery on your face, you want people to know you don’t use botox. I don’t know. I guess that makes as…

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Rumer Willis Understands ThingsBy toddJuly 07, 2011

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Ladies, if you’re still on the fence about the direct correlation between having huge breasts and how seriously you’re taken, please take a long look at Rumer Willis. She’s a pale, cellulite mess with a gigantic head that looks like Hellyboy raped Jimmy Neutron and Dane Cook, but she wore this shirt yesterday with her rack hanging out. And now she’s on this site today. So you can see…wait, what now? You see, she’s unattractive but she wore a sh..oh, JESUS CHRIST DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU PEOPLE?!?! TITTIES OKAY?!?! YOU HAPPY NOW?!?! You guys know how much I don’t like saying that word! Goddammit, you guys.

Ladies, if you’re still on the fence about the direct correlation between having huge breasts and how seriously you’re taken, please take a long look at Rumer Willis. She’s a…

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Lady Gaga Is A Narcissistic Drug Addict, Thinks She’s FatBy toddJuly 07, 2011

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Oh, and she has Lupus or whatever. Does that mean she can turn into a wolf? That would be cool. Radar Online reports:

Lady Gaga has been branded ‘sick’ and ‘obsessed’ in an explosive new tell-all which documents her alleged drug abuse and dangerous diet. In a revealing interview with Star Magazine, investigative journalist Ian Halperin has made startling allegations about the wacky performer, insisting she is a walking time bomb. “Those who have worked with her on tour reported to me that Gaga barely ate for weeks at a time to fit into her costume,” said Halperin, who has spent 12 months investigating Gaga for his book. “She is sick and obsessed with her weight. One friend told me, Gaga will stare at herself in the mirror for hours on end, analyzing and critiquing her body. It’s an unhealthy obsession.” And while most people believe her outrageous outfits and heavy makeup are just part of her act, Halperin says there is a more sinister reason behind her look. “Her lupus is far worse than she lets on,” he said of the disease, which Gaga has admitted to having. “Part of the reason she wears wigs and makeup is because her hair is falling out and she’s covered in red blotches, both side effects of the disease.” But her weight and her health are not her only problems Halperin claims. “Her drug use started young. From heroin to cocaine and ecstasy, her friends say that she has done every drug conceivable. You name it she has done it. “She’s morphed into this caricature called Lady Gaga, who isn’t even a real person. The girl known as Stefi to her friends and family has all but disappeared.”

Wait, does all of this mean that Lady Gaga is gonna die soon? I want to get excited, but I want to make sure I’m reading this right.

Oh, and she has Lupus or whatever. Does that mean she can turn into a wolf? That would be cool. Radar Online reports: Lady Gaga has been branded ‘sick’ and…

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Lindsay Looks GreatBy toddJuly 07, 2011

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Here’s Lindsay Lohan outside Gjelina restaurant in Venice on Tuesday night, and it’s time like this when we’re reminded of her classic beauty and understated elegance. Later, Lindsay tried to purse snatch a lady then steal her baby while screaming, “Colombians got two for fives here baby dem niggas got garbage down the way!” Does anybody know what that means? I think she was talking about ice cream. I also think she might be racist. So if any black people see her, remember what you just read here.

Here’s Lindsay Lohan outside Gjelina restaurant in Venice on Tuesday night, and it’s time like this when we’re reminded of her classic beauty and understated elegance. Later, Lindsay tried to…

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Kim Kardashian Is Very UpsetBy toddJuly 06, 2011

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In 1995, Robert Kardashian successfully made a jury believe that O.J. Simpson didn’t behead Nicole Brown Simpson and stab Ron Goldman to death. Since you can’t keep a good raging sociopath down, O.J. Simpson barged into a Las Vegas hotel room with a gun because he thought somebody was selling his t-shirts he could have been spending on things other than the $33 million awarded to the Goldman family in their wrongful death suit. With the prestige/notoriety of her family name, Kim Kardashian was allowed to follow Paris Hilton around like a pound puppy until one strategic Ray-J nut in her mouth later, Kim Kardashian was shot to international superstardom and has reaped untold riches with the help of her whore mother. So, you’d think she’d be happy for other defense attorneys with young daughters who got a psychopathic murderer off. She wasn’t. Now she doesn’t understand why everybody is being a big meanie face. Us Magazine reports:

Kim Kardashian is one of many celebrities who weighed in on Casey Anthony’s not guilty verdict; but the reality star’s family ties to another high-profile case caused many critics to discount her opinion…“Reading the comments here and it’s nuts people think just because I was close to the OJ trial I can’t have my own opinion on the Casey Anthony case?” she wrote.

I pretty much said all I need to say on Twitter here, so I really don’t have anything else to add except to say I’m concerned my power bill is higher than normal this month. You think I should call them? I should call them but I’m not really good on the phone.

In 1995, Robert Kardashian successfully made a jury believe that O.J. Simpson didn’t behead Nicole Brown Simpson and stab Ron Goldman to death. Since you can’t keep a good raging…

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GMA Wants A ReunionBy jessMarch 26, 2011
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This has nothing to do with ratings. E! Online reports:

ABC didn’t plan on filing a complaint against recent Good Morning America guest Chris Brown when he destroyed part of his dressing room this week. Quite the opposite: After host Robin Roberts’ questions about Rihanna and Brown’s legal woes infuriated the star so much that he threw a chair through a plate-glass window, GMA extended him another invitation to come back on the show!

Indeed, sources at ABC have confirmed to me that producers want to “milk this event for everything its worth,” high moral news standards (and, one assumes, laws, especially those involving convicted felons and their subsequent behavior) be damned. And not only was Brown’s upcoming Dancing With the Stars appearance next week not canceled, as we predicted, guess what other media deal ABC wants to build with bad-boy Brown?

A reality show, perhaps?

“No, that would never happen here,” said a top-level ABC insider, who knows the current situation regarding Brown very well. “What’s far more likely is orchestrating Chris Brown talking to Rihanna for the first time.”

I’m assured that’s a top get to get at the network right now—especially now that all things Brown have electrified the media so much.

Reuniting Chris Brown with Rihanna is such an awesome idea that everyone can get behind. He’s demonstrated that he’s learned his lesson and can successfully manage his anger. Plus, what he did wasn’t so bad. I mean, look–she still has all of her teeth. And c’mon guys, he got a certificate. You have to earn those. Just like I did for making the best brownies at the bake sale. I’m not sure what Chris Brown’s secret to success is, but I know mine. For a fudgier consistency, use one less egg.

Here’s Vanessa Hudgens at a Suckerpunch premiere. It seemed to fit.

All images from WENN.

This has nothing to do with ratings. E! Online reports: ABC didn’t plan on filing a complaint against recent Good Morning America guest Chris Brown when he destroyed part of…

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Charlie Sheen Is A BlockbusterBy jessMarch 26, 2011
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Charlie Sheen’s got an A-list project to launch his comeback since being fired from Two And A Half Men. Oh, wait. From Radar Online:

Charlie Sheen filmed a small cameo for the movie She Wants Me, starring Hilary Duff, and RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively that he’s also taken on the role of executive producer!

According to a source, Sheen initially agreed to a part in the movie because he’s good friends with one of the producers, Mark Holder, and eventually he progressed into an executive producer title.

“Charlie is one of the executive producers on the film, which is a new addition to the small role he has,” director Rob Margolies’ rep told RadarOnline.com.

“They filmed last fall and are currently editing the movie which should be ready for a June release.”

In addition to Duff, the movie also features Love and Other Drugs star Josh Gad, who is a neurotic writer working on a screenplay who ends up in a sticky situation when an A-list actress shows interest in a role that he was hoping his girlfriend would get.

If you’re looking for a comeback vehicle, you should probably look elsewhere than a project where Hilary Duff is the marquee name. Charlie Sheen has a better shot at resurrecting his career doing dinner theater in North Dakota. Or, you know, by drinking chocolate milk and not doing drugs.

Hilary Duff at some event a month ago:

All images via WENN.

Charlie Sheen’s got an A-list project to launch his comeback since being fired from Two And A Half Men. Oh, wait. From Radar Online: Charlie Sheen filmed a small cameo…

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