The “Tom Cruise is gay” rumors have been around long before this site or you probably you existed, and let’s be honest, Top Gun didn’t help. But unlike fellow Scientologist John Travolta, these rumors have been pretty difficult to prove. Haha, not fast says Paul Barresi, a Hollywood private detective who was sent to prison in 2008 for illegal wiretapping!
Stories about Tom Cruise’s sexuality have dogged his career….Speaking exclusively, Paul said he’s going to reveal “the inside story” of bombshell homosexual claims made about Tom, 53, by a former male escort and porn star named Nathan “Big Red” Hamilton. The man, also known as Theodore Ragsdale Jr., was at one time shopping his own book about Tom to divulge what he claimed was a series of sordid sex romps with the superstar in London in 1999.
We’ve all seen Tom Cruise do all his own stunts. That should have clued us in that he’s definitely a power top.
Paul said he asked Big Red if he was nervous and the man said, “Tom whispered in my ear, ‘It’s OK. Just relax. Just relax.’” He alleged the two men wrestled for a time and then Tom asked Big Red to pleasure himself! “At the time, he actually picked me up and threw me down. Then, once my underwear was off, he got into some serious stroking. He told me to (masturbate) so he could watch. I did and after I (ejaculated), he threw me a towel. I got dressed and then two men drove me back to Marcello’s club in London.”
When the National Enquirer gets a story wrong, they get it way wrong, but when they get it right, they tend to break the Internet. So, I guess this is up to you to believe. I don’t know if I believe Tom Cruise is gay or just weird. Every time you see him not in a movie, it seems like he’s an alien who just landed on Earth and watched some commercial to practice. And it’s always been creepy the way Scientology uses an Excel spreadsheet and a sun dial to pick which women he should date and/or marry. Or maybe he likes banging dudes. Anyway, Happy MLK Day.
So I Googled “Big Red” and it was either pictures of Christina Hendricks or pictures of gum that’s been deliciously different since 1937:
The Time Ke$ha Electrocuted Her Twat With Power Tools [Dlisted]
Elle Should Be Ashamed of Itself [Fishwrapper]
Angelina Jolie Braless Pokies (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Stevie From ‘Eastbound & Down’ Tried To Bang Lindsay Lohan In Real Life [The Superficial]
Olivia Munn Dresses To Impress [Hollywood Tuna]
Selena Gomez Gets Sexy For Letterman [Popoholic]
Kylie Minogue has a 2014 Calendar out (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Something seems different about Lara Flynn Boyle [TMZ]
Busy day for Prince Harry [Lainey Gossip]
Tom Cruise got booed by the crowd at a Dodgers game [Celebitchy]
Jessica Alba Chats On Cellphone & Feeds Parking Meter AT THE SAME TIME [Moe Jackson]
Will Smith’s trailer costs more than your house [Film Drunk]
Nicole Scherzinger ain't bad [Celebslam]
Sexy Sorority Girl Slut-O-Ween 2013 [COED Magazine]
The Jonas Brothers Deleted Their Twitter Account [The Blemish]
Kate Moss Has Mandatory Cigarette Breaks In Her Contract [Evil Beet Gossip]
C-3PO Confirmed for Star Wars Episode VII? [Crave Online]
Lady Gaga is doing a holiday special with the Muppets [Popbytes]
Robert Pattinson: Why He Won’t Be Cast As Christian Grey [Hollywood Life]
Everything (And Everyone) Eaten In Mortal Kombat [Thrillist]
Pic source = Twitter
Steve Jobs, the hipster god who created products that makes them stand in line every six months, is widely known to have been an absolute nightmare to work with and believed to have narcissitic personality disorder (he regularly parked in handicap spaces, he once screamed at police and repeatedly honked his horn when they pulled him over for going 100 in a residential because he "was in a hurry", he reportedly got upset when Obama didn't personally call him after the launch of the iPad, etc.) is now the subject of a new book, The Bite in the Apple: A Memoir of My Life With Steve Jobs, that was written by a former girlfriend, Chrisann Brennan. Apparently Stevie was always horny and liked boning in sheds. Radar Online reports:
Brennan and Jobs were an item from 1972 until 1977. She said that Jobs retuned from a 1974 trip to India with new sexual enlightenment regarding tantra, saying, “It all broke open between us when he asked if I would make tantric love with him in his garden shed.” She said that Jobs’ professional focus and dedication trickled down to the bedroom, as he avoided emissions to save his mojo, and store “power and wealth by conserving one’s vital energies. “Our birth control method up to that point was Steve’s coitus interruptus, also called the pull–out method, which for him was about his conserving his energy for work.” She writes in the tome that she and the late genius “shared nights of lovemaking so profound that, astonishingly, some 15 years later, he called me out of the blue to thank me.”
And since the pull out method doesn't work, Steve Jobs was the Adrian Peterson of the 70s, except he probably wouldn't have went to the hospital.
Brennan, who has a daughter named Lisa with the late tech mogul, paints a dark portrait of the inventor, describing his reaction when she told him she was expecting their child. “Steve’s face turned ugly,” she wrote. “He gave me a fiery look. Then he rushed out of the house without a word,” adding he “told me he felt like I was stealing his genes.” Jobs denied fathering the child for years, until a 1979 paternity test proved him the biological dad.
Jobs was an orphan, so you'd think he wouldn't want his child to feel abandoned like he was, but you can't really let something like another human being you helped create get in the way of building computers in a garage. I mean, somethings are just more important. That being said, I have an iPhone so I should probably chill with outrage. iOS7 is so pretty!
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When you’ve obviously had a significant amount of plastic surgery on your face, you want people to know you don’t use botox. I don’t know. I guess that makes as much sense as anything else a woman does. Anyway, Megan Fox uploaded these pics to Facebook under the album “THINGS YOU CAN’T DO WITH YOUR FACE WHEN YOU HAVE BOTOX” (yes, in Kanyewest Bold font). So I guess this means she doesn’t use botox. I mean, that’s great and everything, but all I’m really seeing is a bullseye. Maybe I’m reading too much into this.
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Ladies, if you’re still on the fence about the direct correlation between having huge breasts and how seriously you’re taken, please take a long look at Rumer Willis. She’s a pale, cellulite mess with a gigantic head that looks like Hellyboy raped Jimmy Neutron and Dane Cook, but she wore this shirt yesterday with her rack hanging out. And now she’s on this site today. So you can see…wait, what now? You see, she’s unattractive but she wore a sh..oh, JESUS CHRIST DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU PEOPLE?!?! TITTIES OKAY?!?! YOU HAPPY NOW?!?! You guys know how much I don’t like saying that word! Goddammit, you guys.
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Oh, and she has Lupus or whatever. Does that mean she can turn into a wolf? That would be cool. Radar Online reports:
Lady Gaga has been branded ‘sick’ and ‘obsessed’ in an explosive new tell-all which documents her alleged drug abuse and dangerous diet. In a revealing interview with Star Magazine, investigative journalist Ian Halperin has made startling allegations about the wacky performer, insisting she is a walking time bomb. “Those who have worked with her on tour reported to me that Gaga barely ate for weeks at a time to fit into her costume,” said Halperin, who has spent 12 months investigating Gaga for his book. “She is sick and obsessed with her weight. One friend told me, Gaga will stare at herself in the mirror for hours on end, analyzing and critiquing her body. It’s an unhealthy obsession.” And while most people believe her outrageous outfits and heavy makeup are just part of her act, Halperin says there is a more sinister reason behind her look. “Her lupus is far worse than she lets on,” he said of the disease, which Gaga has admitted to having. “Part of the reason she wears wigs and makeup is because her hair is falling out and she’s covered in red blotches, both side effects of the disease.” But her weight and her health are not her only problems Halperin claims. “Her drug use started young. From heroin to cocaine and ecstasy, her friends say that she has done every drug conceivable. You name it she has done it. “She’s morphed into this caricature called Lady Gaga, who isn’t even a real person. The girl known as Stefi to her friends and family has all but disappeared.”
Wait, does all of this mean that Lady Gaga is gonna die soon? I want to get excited, but I want to make sure I’m reading this right.
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Here’s Lindsay Lohan outside Gjelina restaurant in Venice on Tuesday night, and it’s time like this when we’re reminded of her classic beauty and understated elegance. Later, Lindsay tried to purse snatch a lady then steal her baby while screaming, “Colombians got two for fives here baby dem niggas got garbage down the way!” Does anybody know what that means? I think she was talking about ice cream. I also think she might be racist. So if any black people see her, remember what you just read here.
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In 1995, Robert Kardashian successfully made a jury believe that O.J. Simpson didn’t behead Nicole Brown Simpson and stab Ron Goldman to death. Since you can’t keep a good raging sociopath down, O.J. Simpson barged into a Las Vegas hotel room with a gun because he thought somebody was selling his t-shirts he could have been spending on things other than the $33 million awarded to the Goldman family in their wrongful death suit. With the prestige/notoriety of her family name, Kim Kardashian was allowed to follow Paris Hilton around like a pound puppy until one strategic Ray-J nut in her mouth later, Kim Kardashian was shot to international superstardom and has reaped untold riches with the help of her whore mother. So, you’d think she’d be happy for other defense attorneys with young daughters who got a psychopathic murderer off. She wasn’t. Now she doesn’t understand why everybody is being a big meanie face. Us Magazine reports:
Kim Kardashian is one of many celebrities who weighed in on Casey Anthony’s not guilty verdict; but the reality star’s family ties to another high-profile case caused many critics to discount her opinion…“Reading the comments here and it’s nuts people think just because I was close to the OJ trial I can’t have my own opinion on the Casey Anthony case?” she wrote.
I pretty much said all I need to say on Twitter here, so I really don’t have anything else to add except to say I’m concerned my power bill is higher than normal this month. You think I should call them? I should call them but I’m not really good on the phone.
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God made Audrina Patridge’s face ready to wear for Halloween, but at least she tried to look hot and slutty this weekend. I mean, she’s kinda required by law because of her big tits and kick ass stomach. Christ, they’re sick. I would sling an entire civilization on them, but I’m not sure about her costume’s return policy.