Ryan Lochte Is Somebody’s Father NowBy toddDecember 15, 2016
Ryan Lochte Is Somebody’s Father Now

 

Imagine being a fetus and realizing your father is Ryan Lochte and your mother is a Playboy Playmate Kayla Rae Reid. Do you start using heroin now or what until 7th grade?

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  Imagine being a fetus and realizing your father is Ryan Lochte and your mother is a Playboy Playmate Kayla Rae Reid. Do you start using heroin now or what…

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Ryan Gosling Is Single. Or Isn’t Single.By toddFebruary 06, 2014

That sound you heard yesterday was a tsunami of panties flying after two media outlets (InTouch Weekly and Life & Style) reported that Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes had split after two years. According to reports, Eva Mendes likes to party and Ryan Gosling likes to stay at home and make babies. Daily Mail reports:

They seemed to be crazy about each other when they stepped out regularly in LA with her dog Hugo. But on Wednesday, two publications reported Ryan Gosling, 33, and his girlfriend Eva Mendes, 39, split up over Christmas. 'There is no ill will,' InTouch's source said. 'Neither is rushing out to date other people right now.' Life & Style Weekly's source added: 'They just knew it was time.' Ryan's rep did not return calls to MailOnline. Eva's rep chose to not comment. A big problem was they liked different things. Eva, who is the face of Thierry Mugler perfume, preferred to be in the limelight, while her partner didn't. 'Eva loves Hollywood, the parties, the glamor,' a source shared. 'She loves going out.' But not Ryan, who is 'introverted – very serious and a total homebody'. Another problem was getting hitched and having babies. 'They knew it was time to take the next step and get married,' a friend admitted. 'But neither was sure they wanted that to happen.' Mendes has said in the past she was not interested in becoming a mother. 'I'm certainly not thinking about being a mom,' the beauty has said. 'I can't imagine it. I'm too selfish.' The Only God Forgives actor, however, wanted a brood. 'I'd like to be making babies,' he said. 'But I'm not, so I'm making movies.'

But as soon as the reports surfaced, Mendes' rep shot then down:

Sorry, ladies. Despite new reports which claim the couple, who were first romantically linked in September 2011, called it quits over the holidays, Eva's rep tells E! News the latest breakup reports are just another round of rumors.

It's a rep's job to say shit like this, so who knows if they're broken up or not. If they are, Ryan should text me. I mean, he's prettier than some of the chicks I've dated and I set a personal record max on the bench press yesterday. I also make pretty good brownies and can rock the fuck out of a tie and vest. Just sayin'. Holla at me, boo.

That sound you heard yesterday was a tsunami of panties flying after two media outlets (InTouch Weekly and Life & Style) reported that Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes had split…

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‘Hannibal’ Season 2 Has A TrailerBy toddFebruary 06, 2014

 

If your benchmark for gross and disturbing is The Walking Dead, then I assume you didn't watch the first season of Hannibal, because damn. Some episodes were so psychologically disturbing and fucked up that my grandma had to give me warm milk before bed and sit with me before I fell asleep. What? Over Skype! She did it over Skype! I so don't live with my grandmother. Look, just forget I even said anything, okay?!

  If your benchmark for gross and disturbing is The Walking Dead, then I assume you didn't watch the first season of Hannibal, because damn. Some episodes were so psychologically…
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Charlie’s Angels Got CannedBy jessOctober 15, 2011
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Sorry to all three of you who watched it. The LA Times reports:

Goodbye, Charlie: “Charlie’s Angels” is joining the cancellation club after four episodes. The news comes a day after ABC announced full-season pickups for freshman series “Suburgatory” and “Revenge.” The network’s attempt at revamping the 1970s campy series with Minka Kelly, Annie Ilonzeh and Rachael Taylor as three young female detectives in Miami proved futile. The series brought in 8.7 million viewers with its Sept. 22 premiere, but the numbers dropped from there. Thursday’s episode garnered 6 million viewers, a marginal increase from the previous week. Production has already shut down on the series, and remaining episodes will air until the network decides what will fill the time slot.

When will people realize that the original show was only half-decent because there wasn’t Internet porn in the ’70s? Any and all reboots are doomed to fail. The movie remake did less for Demi Moore than Sarah Leal did, so I’m not sure why they thought this one would work out. Since developing an actual acting ability is a lot of work, in order to maintain relevance and a spot as filler on this site, expect Minka Kelly to start banging Derek Jeter again in 3… 2…

Sorry to all three of you who watched it. The LA Times reports: Goodbye, Charlie: “Charlie’s Angels” is joining the cancellation club after four episodes. The news comes a day…

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Lindsay Lohan Has The World On A StringBy toddOctober 14, 2011

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In case you were on the fence about Lindsay Lohan is an entitled, self-important, spoiled child with no concept of consequences who spits in the face of the law at every turn while thinking she’s a part of the fashion world in Paris by being a prostitute to get into shows, I hope this helps. TMZ reports:

Lindsay Lohan has been kicked out of the program where she was supposed to complete her community service because she violated the rules numerous times … TMZ has learned. Judge Stephanie Sautner ordered Lohan to serve 360 hours at the Downtown Women’s Center in L.A., as part of her probation in the shoplifting case. Part of the deal — the judge required her to be reliable, non-disruptive, and serve at least 4 hours at a time. But sources tell us … Lindsay blew off 9 scheduled visits … and when she did show up, she would often bail after working there for only an hour. Sources say … 2 weeks ago, she was terminated from the Women’s Center because of the violations.

Lindsay also failed to see her psychologist once a week. And why should she? Anybody with those teeth has to be of sound mind.

Lindsay Lohan has violated the judge’s order in her probation case by not seeing a psychologist at least once a week … TMZ has learned … and that may be enough to send her to the slammer. Judge Stephanie Sautner made it clear to Lindsay during her sentence last May … she MUST see the shrink every week, but she has not. We’re told one of her excuses is that she’s been working out of the country, but Judge Sautner made it extremely clear … work is not an excuse for failing to comply with the terms of probation.

And I hope you didn’t think Lindsay wasn’t going to stand on a chair and jump up and down and point at everyone else for making her only complete 21 hours of community service since July did you? Of course you didn’t. TMZ reports:

Lindsay Lohan is telling friends … she was unfairly booted from the Downtown Women’s Center … insisting the staff was REALLY mean to her from the second she arrived. Lohan has assured her inner circle … she did everything she was asked to do while performing her court-ordered community service at the L.A. center over the past few months … and NEVER showed up late. TMZ broke the story … the people in the Probation Dept. responsible for overseeing Lindsay’s probation decided Lindsay could not go back to the Women’s Center, because she repeatedly didn’t show up, and when she did she would bail after an hour — a violation of the judge’s order that she serve 4 hours at a time.

Lindsay is going to blame this on the paparazzi, again, like she always does. Her excuse to staffers at DWC was that she was being hounded by the press, and just couldn’t make it out of the car, and into the building. Yes, there were photographers around when she did show up, but it wasn’t intrusive, and didn’t impeed upon anyone’s ability to maneuver in or out of the building,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com.

Lindsay’s next progress hearing is in four days, and I swear to God, if they don’t taser her then feed her to a pit of lions as soon as she gets out the car, then what exactly is point of having a hearing or putting her on probation? Nothing they have done so far has worked. Not the warnings. Not the fifth and sixth chances. Not the threat of jail time. Not the public beheading. Not the promi…wait, they haven’t mentioned a public beheading yet? That should look into that. Because I’m pretty sure cutting off her head will free up a lot of the court’s calendar.

In case you were on the fence about Lindsay Lohan is an entitled, self-important, spoiled child with no concept of consequences who spits in the face of the law at…

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Ashley Greene Was TrickedBy toddOctober 14, 2011

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No matter what her lawyers say, here is my girlfriend Ashley Greene walking around L.A. yesterday talking on the phone. See how happy she looks? I used a number she didn’t recognize this time then I disguised my voice and told her Martin Scorsese wants her as the lead in his new movie. And if she wants the part, she should show up for a meeting. At my address. I bet she’ll think my surprise will be so romantic!

No matter what her lawyers say, here is my girlfriend Ashley Greene walking around L.A. yesterday talking on the phone. See how happy she looks? I used a number she…

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Adrianne Curry Really Enjoys TwitterBy toddOctober 12, 2011

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You won’t believe this, but Adrianne Curry was using Twitter, then took a picture of herself, then put it on Twitter. I know! My mind is blown! But I hope everybody understands why she posted this picture. And I agree with her. That area rug would make a nice addition to any home and looks great on hardwoods.

You won’t believe this, but Adrianne Curry was using Twitter, then took a picture of herself, then put it on Twitter. I know! My mind is blown! But I hope…

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Rihanna Finally Has Her Sexiest Woman Alive CoverBy toddOctober 11, 2011
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I know everyone has been waiting on pins and needles, so finally, here’s Rihanna’s Sexiest Woman Alive cover for Esquire. Because the ability to take a punch is sexy apparently.

I know everyone has been waiting on pins and needles, so finally, here’s Rihanna’s Sexiest Woman Alive cover for Esquire. Because the ability to take a punch is sexy apparently.

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Kris Humphries Already Lost His Wedding RingBy toddOctober 11, 2011

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“Who gives a shit?” – everyone in the entire world. Radar Online reports:

Kim Kardashian’s new husband, Kris Humphries, has already lost his wedding ring — less than two months after tying the knot! Humphries gold and black diamond wedding band went missing at a Minneapolis airport leaving the basketball player in a state of panic, according to one eyewitness. Good Samaritan Omar Ahmad was going through the metal detector when Humphries lost the Lorraine Schwartz sparkler. “Kris must have had to take off all his jewelry or it slipped off his finger because he was freaking out and frantically looking for it yelling ‘where’s my ring?!'” Ahmad said, in an interview. “He was crawling on his knees looking for it underneath the x-ray machine. No one was helping him and very few actually recognized him except for me. So I stepped in to help.”…After 10 minutes on their knees, Ahmad said he found the band in the corner and security grabbed it. “Kris was just so thankful I helped him and and didn’t just leave him. It’s funny, I was really the only one who knew who he was.”

I assume Kris Jenner already cashed E!’s check, so I’m not understanding why Humphries was in such a panic to find this thing. There were no cameras or production staff around, so it’s not like it actually happened. You might as well tell me you saw a unicorn playing basketball. The Kardashians won’t get diagnosed with cancer or die in a plane crash unless the lighting is correct and the scene has been properly blocked first.

“Who gives a shit?” – everyone in the entire world. Radar Online reports: Kim Kardashian’s new husband, Kris Humphries, has already lost his wedding ring — less than two months…

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Ashton Kutcher’s Side Piece Seems Fun, Is ToplessBy toddOctober 10, 2011
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It's hard to believe that a chick from Vegas who would willingly sleep with a married man then try to blackmail him for $250,000 would have topless pictures of herself online, but sometimes you just don't really know a person.

 

pic source = Egotastic

 

It's hard to believe that a chick from Vegas who would willingly sleep with a married man then try to blackmail him for $250,000 would have topless pictures of herself…

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