James Franco Might Have Head-Butted Some Dude Over Lana Del ReyBy toddOctober 19, 2016
James Franco Might Have Head-Butted Some Dude Over Lana Del Rey

 

A photographer is suing James Franco because in 2014 he was at a Lana Del Rey concert, and if I’m reading this right, James Franco was high as shit on something.

David Tonnessen says he was snapping photos of Lana at Hollywood Forever Cemetery in 2014 when Franco, unprovoked, viciously charged and head-butted him in the stomach. According to the docs … Franco was “smiling, rather demonically” when Tonnessen first spotted him, and then — with a “blank expression of joy on his face” … knocked him to the ground. Tonnessen says he was hospitalized and suffered permanent injuries. He’s suing for medical expenses and other damages. We’ve reached out to Franco, so far no word back.

I have no idea where this story is gonna go, but here’s some pics of Lana Del Rey in 2014. Doesn’t seem worth it.

 

  A photographer is suing James Franco because in 2014 he was at a Lana Del Rey concert, and if I’m reading this right, James Franco was high as shit…

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Amber Rose Perfectly Summed Up The Donald Trump Sex StuffBy toddOctober 18, 2016
Amber Rose Perfectly Summed Up The Donald Trump Sex Stuff

 

If you don’t really want to hear what Amber Rose has to say, it’s easy to write her off as a “slut” or “stripper” to keep your fear of women who won’t allow themselves to be subjugated at bay, but when she has an opinion on an issue, it’s pretty much fucking spot on. She also killed Kanye with a single tweet and sent Khloe Kardashian into the ether. Respect. On Friday, during her Loveline with Amber Rose podcast, Rose gave her opinion on the latest Donald Trump mess.

“This is definitely not me sticking up for Donald Trump at all, [but] I do feel like, based on his age, where he came from, the fact that he grew up with a lot of money and a lot of entitlement, that’s probably all he knows. White, privileged, older, f–king rich as f–k,”..“‘I can touch anybody’s p—y I want, I’m Donald Trump. Who the hell is ever going to say no?’”

If you have any critical thinking skills at all, it just takes one time listening to Donald Trump responding to these allegations to understand that this is 100% how he feels. He’s more annoyed that his supporters might not think the women are hot. You know who does that? Narcissists who get caught on hot mics saying they grab pussy whenever they want, then saying the dozen who claimed he did just that are liars.

Then Amber Rose said this. This right here.

“I feel like if Donald Trump — if I was just a regular girl, before I became an activist — came and touched my vagina, I would be scared to tell someone. I would be terrified. I would be like, ‘Donald Trump literally just touched my vagina. Who the f–k do I call? Do I call 9-1-1? Do I call the cop that lives in my neighborhood? Who do I contact? Do I get online and put it on Twitter?”…How do I go about it [so] people literally wouldn’t say, ‘You’re f–king lying. Donald Trump is a millionaire. He doesn’t have to touch your vagina without consent. He could literally f–k whoever he wants’?”

If you don’t understand that last blockquote and how it pertains to victims of sexual assault by powerful men, then either you wish you could grab pussy without recourse or you just hate Hillary too much to understand. Or it it could just be a big media conspiracy to make Trump say these things. You never know!

 

  If you don’t really want to hear what Amber Rose has to say, it’s easy to write her off as a “slut” or “stripper” to keep your fear of women…

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‘The Accountant’ UK Premiere Was Last Night, Anna Kendrick Seems ThrilledBy toddOctober 18, 2016
‘The Accountant’ UK Premiere Was Last Night, Anna Kendrick Seems Thrilled

 

From what I can tell, The Accountant is about a slick hitman with autism who shoots bad guys instead of elementary school children with a gun his mom bought. Part of this movie filmed right outside my friend’s apartment in Buckhead, and you could legit look out the window and see Ben Affleck. The didn’t even make me want to go to Buckhead. Cool story, Todd. Anyway, the UK premiere was last night, and I still can’t figure out if Anna Kendrick is supposed to be attractive or not. Her face kinda looks like a witch mask. The boobs don’t, so this what might be causing the confusion on my end.

 

  From what I can tell, The Accountant is about a slick hitman with autism who shoots bad guys instead of elementary school children with a gun his mom bought. Part of…

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Trump Fans Booed And Walked Out Of An Amy Schumer ShowBy toddOctober 17, 2016
Trump Fans Booed And Walked Out Of An Amy Schumer Show

 

Just so this makes sense, Amy Schumer‘s comedy show was in Florida.

About 200 people walked out of Amy Schumer’s comedy show at the Amalie Arena in Tampa Sunday when she mocked Donald Trump as, among other things, an “orange, sexual-assaulting, fake- college-starting monster.” Loud booing from a vocal, but small minority of the arena crowd started about halfway through the show, when Schumer’s raunchy humor veered into more topical matters topics, including gun control and the presidential election…She made it clear she doesn’t understand how people can support Trump. At one point, she asked for a Trump supporter – preferably one with sleeves, she told security personnel – to join her up on stage to explain their enthusiasm for Trump. One fellow did, but he said he was voting for Trump mainly because he doesn’t trust Clinton. When some audience members booed, the actor/comedian invited them to leave and also asked security to remove anyone booing.

Just like their Supreme Leader, when faced with even the slightest bit of criticism, Trump stans have an unhinged meltdown, but also, Amy Schumer is a horrible person. I’m voting third party on this one. Nope. Still not Gary Johnson. Dude needs to just eat the other half of his brownie and go to sleep.

 

UPDATE: The video was removed from YouTube. It’s a global conspiracy and the media is trying to rig the election or something.

 

  Just so this makes sense, Amy Schumer‘s comedy show was in Florida. About 200 people walked out of Amy Schumer’s comedy show at the Amalie Arena in Tampa Sunday…

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The 86th Annual Academy Awards Were Last NightBy toddMarch 03, 2014
The 86th Annual Academy Awards Were Last Night

 

As my brilliant title suggests, the 86th Annual Academy Awards were last night, and before we get into everything, here's the list of winners that you care about. Please note that Sound Mixing and Cinematography are not listed. Mostly because I have no idea what those things are. What does mixing stuff with cinnamon have to do with a making a movie? It just makes no sense. Also, Matthew McConaughey is damn handsome man. I can admit that.

 

BEST PICTURE: 12 Years a Slave

BEST ACTOR: Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club

ACTRESS: Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine

SUPPORTING ACTOR: Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club

SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years a Slave

DIRECTOR: Alfonso Cuarón, Gravity

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: John Ridley, 12 Years a Slave

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Spike Jonze, Her

  As my brilliant title suggests, the 86th Annual Academy Awards were last night, and before we get into everything, here's the list of winners that you care about. Please…

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Muslims Hate Katy Perry NowBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

Katy Perry is probably the furthest thing from what Jesus had in mind when he made people climb a mountain to hear him talk. Apparently Jesus also wanted people to get exercise, but then he gave them a bunch of bread. Carbs? Make up your mind, Jesus! Damn.  Also, a mountain? Nice acoustics, jackass. Anyway, like most Christians, Katy Perry likes to pull out the Christian card when it fits her needs, and she sees herself as some evolved spiritualist who embraces all faiths and religions, but mostly those people just smoke a lot of weed. But for her music video for "Dark Horse", she did a thing that pissed off Muslims. That's always a good idea.

A number of Muslim netizens around the world are upset with her music video and are insulted by a scene in which Katy was seen destroying a man with his pendant depicting the Arabic word for "Allah".  Petitions for Youtube to bring down the music video have also been issued by Muslim netizens.

A person who wasn't Muslim mentioned the word "Allah" in something, so naturally there's petitions going around to have this video removed and Katy Perry beheaded or stoned or whatever Muslims do to women who won't have sex with them. Hey, man. Try a few compliments and maybe a nice dinner. Also, make her laugh. All religions are dumb and make no sense, but one thing they all do well is wait for the chance to get offended. Religious people love that shit. They also always want you to join because if you join, that means they aren't as crazy because it sounded like a good idea to you too. But Islam? Nah, brah. I can't fuck with a religion that promises you get to bang 1,000 virgins when you get to heaven. Sorry. That sounds mad boring. I don't have time to sit down and have a talk to explain things a thousand times. If you could just bend over and let me pull your arms behind your back so I can use you as a counterweight without me having to use a logistics flow process diagram that would be ideal.

  Katy Perry is probably the furthest thing from what Jesus had in mind when he made people climb a mountain to hear him talk. Apparently Jesus also wanted people…

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There’s A Yeezus Movie Coming OutBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

If you feel like paying money to sit in the dark and listen to Kanye West tell you how great Kanye West is for two hours, you're in luck, because he released the trailer for his upcoming movie Yeezus yesterday on his official site. It looks like a  concert film, but Brett Easton Ellis wrote a script for it, so there's a good chance it'll have a serial killer and a gay dude in it at some point. Also, somebody might have AIDS or be hooked on heroin and speak in run on sentences that last five pages. The last movie Ellis wrote could only cast Lindsay Lohan and a porn star, so let's try to keep our expectations low. Not sure if Kim Kardashian will be in it or not, but I imagine Kanye West in a fur coat will get more screen time than that bar that runs at the bottom of Sportscenter.

  If you feel like paying money to sit in the dark and listen to Kanye West tell you how great Kanye West is for two hours, you're in luck,…

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Do Not Attempt To Grab Justin Timberlake’s AssBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

Justin Timberlake took his 20/20 Experience tour to Philly on Tuesday, and since Philly is a shit hole of degenerates and drunks, of course someone would attempt to sexually assault him. You can clearly see Timberlake slap a hand away twice and give the face the hand belongs to a stare down, then he just dances away. Note: Dancing away after an attempted unwarranted sexual advance has not been shown as an effective rape prevention tool. Us here at IDLYITW suggest you contact the authorities immediately if you or someone you know is the victim of a sexual assault. But do not dance to the phone.

  Justin Timberlake took his 20/20 Experience tour to Philly on Tuesday, and since Philly is a shit hole of degenerates and drunks, of course someone would attempt to sexually…

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Mila Kunis And Ashton Kutcher Are EngagedBy toddFebruary 28, 2014
Mila Kunis And Ashton Kutcher Are Engaged

 

Mila Kunis was spotted with a big ass diamond on her ring finger, so I guess this means she's engaged to Ashton Kutcher. We'll play along.

You are not about to be punk'd. Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis are engaged, E! News exclusively confirms. Kunis was spotted shopping earlier today wearing a diamond ring on that finger, and a source tells us that she and her former That '70s Show costar are indeed planning to make it official.

They've been dating for two years, so I guess this might be true or she just likes big ass diamonds. But two years is plenty of time for Kutcher to have seen her without makeup, and if you haven't seen Kunis without makeup, I suggest you get a night light and check under your bed before you go to sleep because its the stuff of goddamn nightmares. Seriously. You'd bring your pets inside if you saw a Mila Kunis without makeup in your backyard. Hopefully Sephora was mentioned in the prenup.

  Mila Kunis was spotted with a big ass diamond on her ring finger, so I guess this means she's engaged to Ashton Kutcher. We'll play along. You are not…

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Taylor Swift Has Already Written Five Songs About Harry StylesBy toddJanuary 14, 2013



Two days after the news broke that she was dumped yet again, Taylor Swift tweeted this. If you’re doing the math at home, she wrote a song for every 13 days they were together. Sun reports:

HEARTBROKEN Taylor Swift has already penned FIVE songs about her break-up with Harry Styles — despite the couple only splitting a week ago. The American singer is back in the studio and deciding whether to release more tracks about another failed showbiz relationship. Grammy winner Taylor, 23, has just had a No1 hit called We Are Never, which is rumoured to be about Hollywood actor Jake Gyllenhaal. And the star — who only dated One Direction pin-up Harry, 18, for 66 days — also pulled out her poison pen for US singer John Mayer in song Dear John. A source revealed: “Taylor writes music in the same way that other women chat to their friends on the phone. “It’s been how she deals with her emotions for most of her life. “Harry and Taylor only dated for a short time but there were very strong feelings, so it’s been a tough comedown.” The source added: “Lyrics have been written, but Taylor hasn’t come close to deciding whether she’ll ever release them. A song about it will surface at some point but it won’t be anything like the way she had a dig at her other ex John Mayer in one of her other tracks.”

Taylor Swift has been attached to 13 dudes in 4 years, so is she really looking for love or trying to set a world record in imaginary bridal registries? Stop asking dudes to pick out baby names on the first date. Stop buying a house in their neighborhood on the third. Get a tan. Find out why your eyes look Asian. Chill with the bangs. Stop dating dudes based on whether you can check them out of school. Learn a new kind of song. Maybe think about implants. When a guy shows interest in you, go home and practice your sane face in the mirror the same way you do your “I’m so shocked to win this award” face. Watch more Investigative Discovery. Get a cat. Get two cats. I can’t think of anything else right now, but stay away from dick for a while.

Two days after the news broke that she was dumped yet again, Taylor Swift tweeted this. If you’re doing the math at home, she wrote a song for every 13…

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