Lindsay Lohan Is A FelonBy jessFebruary 07, 2011

No shit. TMZ reports:

TMZ broke the story … Lindsay will be charged with felony grand theft as early as today.

An LAPD source tells TMZ … no decision has been made on whether an arrest warrant will be issued — which would then allow cops to find Lindsay, put her in cuffs, and walk her into the station in front of a gaggle of reporters.

There are other options. Authorities could make arrangements for Lindsay to voluntarily surrender at a location and in a manner that would avoid the cameras.

And there’s another possibility … The D.A. could allow Lindsay to surrender in court, at her arraignment.

Say what you want about Lindsay Lohan, but you have to give her credit: She’s smart enough to only get caught committing crimes in LA. (more…)

No shit. TMZ reports: TMZ broke the story … Lindsay will be charged with felony grand theft as early as today. An LAPD source tells TMZ … no decision has…

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John Legend WinsBy jessFebruary 06, 2011
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Swimsuit model/Todd’s Twitter and Formspring bff/John Legend’s lady friend Chrissy Teigen was at a Sports Illustrated pre-Super Bowl party because she’s hot and because she subconsciously wanted to remind you that you have time to win this. The Black Eyed Peas were at the same party because they’re performing at half time today. That means we all lose.

Swimsuit model/Todd’s Twitter and Formspring bff/John Legend’s lady friend Chrissy Teigen was at a Sports Illustrated pre-Super Bowl party because she’s hot and because she subconsciously wanted to remind you…

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Gisele Is A DoctorBy jessFebruary 05, 2011
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A model said something stupid? GTFO!

The supermodel’s latest gaffe: claiming she doesn’t use sun tan lotions because all of the chemicals they contain.

“I cannot put this poison on my skin,” Bundchen — who has appeared in ad campaigns for Nivea Sun products — said at the launch of her own organic skin care range, according to the UK’s Daily Mail. “I do not use anything synthetic.”

Instead, the leggy beauty says she protects herself from sun damage by only exposing herself to rays before 8 A.M.

However, cancer experts have been quick to question Bundchen’s expertise on the matter.

“Sunscreen prevents damage to the skin and is of fundamental importance for the prevention of cancer,” said Dolival Loao, head of dermatology at Brazil’s National Cancer Institute. “This is not any poison, when a public person makes a statement like this, it creates confusion.”

Give me a break. If Gisele really insisted on not using anything synthetic, she would never leave the house with makeup, self tanner, hair extensions, or fake eyelashes ever again. Since that won’t happen, she’s lashing out at something she used to endorse in order to gain publicity for something different she’s currently selling. If this “creates confusion” for anyone, they probably took all of their classes in a room with ramp access.

A model said something stupid? GTFO! The supermodel’s latest gaffe: claiming she doesn’t use sun tan lotions because all of the chemicals they contain. “I cannot put this poison on…

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John Mayer Doesn’t Want To Reek Of Summer’s EveBy jessFebruary 05, 2011
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John Mayer understands that in order to be liked, you don’t need to reform your poor behavior–you just need to change your handlers. Us Weekly says:

A source who recently spent time with the “Heartbreak Warfare” singer, 33, tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on stands now) that he got berated on the street that night for being a serial heartbreaker.

“Girls came up and yelled at him, saying he was a horrible person,” says a source of Mayer, who once held an impromptu press conference with paparazzi to discuss his split with Jennifer Aniston and famously referred to ex Jessica Simpson as “sexual napalm.”

Continues the source, “Girls asked how he could treat women the way he did. People would tell him exactly what they thought of him.”

Now the balladeer says he is looking for “a new team to manage his image,” adds the insider. “He wants to change people’s perspective on him.”

If John Mayer wants to look like less of a douchebag, he could start by shaving and not channeling Corey Hart in public. If women want John Mayer to be less of a douchebag, they could start by not fucking him. If you want your cookies to be chewier, you could use a higher ratio of brown to granulated sugar. I’m here to help!

One of the hearts John Mayer broke is now banging Derek Jeter on the regular. I think she’ll be okay.

John Mayer understands that in order to be liked, you don’t need to reform your poor behavior–you just need to change your handlers. Us Weekly says: A source who recently…

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Adriana Lima Says Good MorningBy toddFebruary 04, 2011

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Let’s face it, Adriana Lima is complete and utter physical perfection. It’s pretty clear nothing even remotely comes close. If I ever stuck my penis in her, I fully expect to pull it out with the power to heal the sick and the ability to perform other miracles of awe and wonder.

Let’s face it, Adriana Lima is complete and utter physical perfection. It’s pretty clear nothing even remotely comes close. If I ever stuck my penis in her, I fully expect…

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