Hey, remember in I Know What You Did Last Summer when you would have ice hooked the entire cast to bang Jennifer Love Hewitt? Good times, good times. Well, it's 2014 now and she's 35 and just had a baby and this is what she looks like now. Women usually hit the wall harder than Dale Earnhardt when they hit 30, and when you add in a human being pushed out of their vagina, you might as well send them over to Amon Goeth. They are no longer essential to our operation here on Earth. Basically what I'm saying is to women over 35 is, ummm, ewwww.
When I hear the words "Bar Refaeli" and "facial" in the same sentence, "gold" isn't really the first thing that comes to mind. Yet here we are. A picture of physical perfection is getting 24-carat gold poured on her face. I wonder if Leonardo DiCaprio ever said that to her as a euphemism.
pic source = Instagram
Speaking of a violent, teen thug who smokes weed and drinks underage and who also has no respect for authority and attacks photographers without provocation, hahahaha sorry I'm mean a white teenager who is just going through a phase and will know better when he's older (because boys will boys!), Justin Bieber has been accused of spitting in yet another man's face. TMZ reports:
An Ohio man claims Justin Bieber confronted him inside a bar and SPIT IN HIS FACE this weekend … all because JB thought he was secretly taking pics. The man — a DJ who performed at the Social Room on Park Street in Columbus, OH earlier that evening — called in to the Dave and Jimmy show on WNCI and explained the saga … saying it all started in the VIP room. "Two of Bieber's bouncers approached me and said I was trying to take pictures of Bieber." The man thinks JB was concerned because it was a 21+ night in the club … and Justin's only 19. The DJ says Bieber's people grabbed his phone and started going through it looking for pics — but didn't find any. Still, the man claims, the bouncers told JB the DJ was trying to take pics. According to the DJ, Justin approached him moments later … and spouted off a couple of "choice words." "He called my mom something, called my dad something, called me something … and spit in my face."
Holy crap, look at Justin Bieber is wearing. That's the uniform we all know. If I see him I should follow him, because based on past information we have, he's obviously upto no good. Then I should probably confront him becasue god knows what these kind of people might do. And if he spits in my face and attacks me, I mean, I'd have no other choice to defend myself. Nothing I did was illegal or warranted such a response. I'd totally get acquitted becausehe attacked me HAHAHAHAHA LOL j/k you guys no I wouldn't.
THREE WORDS: January Jones Topless (NSFW) [My Ex]
Lucy Mecklenburgh Is See Through (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Steven Seagal Is A Russian Arms Dealer Now [The Superficial]
Erin Heatherton’s New Lingerie Sizzle-Fest [Popoholic]
Charisma Carpenter’s Sweet Booty Pop [Hollywood Tuna]
Soon There Will Be A Baby With The Last Name Rocknroll [Dlisted]
Mel B is in a bikini (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Lake Bell’s wedding dress was stupid [Lainey Gossip]
Sean Parker fined 2.5 mill by environmental groups for 9 mill wedding [Celebitchy]
Rihanna Works Her Style While Shopping in Paris [Moe Jackson]
What’s with all the Rapture scripts? [Film Drunk]
Kanye doesn't seem to be too fond of Kim's family [Celebslam]
28 Hottest Bar Refaeli GIFs for Her 28th Birthday [COED Magazine]
Michael Douglas’ Rep Denies Cunnilingus Claim [The Blemish]
Canada Screws Over New Kids On The Block [Evil Beet Gossip]
Behind the Scenes at ‘Game of Thrones’ Red Wedding [Crave Online]
Tyler, The Creator tried to cover for Justin Bieber’s speeding [Popbytes]
You've probably already heard that Amanda Bynes was wandering around Buffalo and saying "we're not in Buffalo" then going to jump on a trampoline in a wig. Yes, that was a thing that happened. This is apprently only good news to people in her apartment building because that means she's not in her apartment building creeping everybody the fuck out. Page Six reports:
Neighbors in Amanda Bynes’ apartment building describe living with the wigged-out starlet as “like living with Linda Blair in ‘The Exorcist.’ ” One told us, “She stares you out in the elevator. Residents are terrified to be alone with her. She knocked on one woman’s door, and when it opened, she screamed ‘You’re ugly,’ and ran away. Amanda always seems to be alone, muttering to herself and looking completely out of it.” The resident said management as well as neighbors in Bynes’ West 47th Street building are fed up with her antics in the lobby, elevators and public corridors. The source added, “The day before her arrest, she arrived in a cab and ran upstairs, leaving the driver shrieking that she owed him $150. She left her cellphone in the cab. The good news is, she hasn’t been seen in the building since her arrest.”
At this point, Amanda Bynes should try trademark her catchphrase, "You're ugly!". It seems to be here go to insult and is apparenytly used on all objects alive or inanimate. I just used it on my dog. And this protein shake. I might even use it on my neighbor later.
Lauren Pope Camel Toe in Silver Bikini (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Miley Cyrus Tweeted A Pic of Herself In A Wedding Dress, Is Handling The Break-Up Well [The Superficial]
Jessica Alba Rocks A Pair Of Skin-Tight Jeans [Popoholic]
Selena Gomez Keeps It Cute And Classy [Hollywood Tuna]
Mimi And Nicki Minaj Officially Quit American Idol [Dlisted]
HANDS DOWN: The Greatest Kelly Brook Photoshoot Ever (NSFW Nipples) [MyEx]
Doutzen Kroes is Hot As Hell In Vogue Brazil (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Penelope Cruz in Spain looking SO cute [Lainey Gossip]
Gwyneth Paltrow ‘has gone from pretentious to unbearable’, people hate her [Celebitchy]
Adriana Lima Keeps It Fresh [Moe Jackson]
There’s a Kickstarter for porn [Film Drunk]
Olivia Wilde is still in Maui [Celebslam]
The month in sport related women [COED Magazine]
Oh, Hey, Sara Jean Underwood [The Blemish]
Is Mila Kunis Mean? [Evil Beet Gossip]
Glenn Close Joins Guardians of the Galaxy [Crave Online]
Netflix wants to make more ‘Arrested Development’ [Popbytes]
I'm almost positive she doesn't have a movie out since she hasn't taken me up on my offer yet, but Sophie Turner went to Cannes where she manged to find a specialty dress shop that caters specifically to extras in rap videos. Then she walked around in Cannes and took pictures of her majestic ass. Look, it's in the street. Now it's in a hallway! And a dock! And in front of a movie poster! Now it's in a mirror! Now it's a some room! Hahaha, that silly butt! It's everywhere!
Source = Twitter
I like when Justin Bieber gives thanks to Jesus every time he wins an award, because Jesus apparently doesn't care if you're a prick as long as you give him props on live television. So Beiber can race on a neighborhood street, make Selena Gomez get an abortion, and spit in a neighbor's face and still be cool JC.Oh, and he can apparently knock up a chick in 2010 then completely abandon her. Awesome! Anything is possible if you belieb. New York Post reports:
In a startlingly detailed report in Star, a 15-year-old Biebs allegedly slept with an unidentified 25-year-old “European” woman on Feb. 4, 2010. They supposedly met at a T.G.I. Fridays after the singer’s concert in Florida and he took her back to his room at the Gansevoort South hotel, the mag claims. After the alleged one-night stand, the woman gave birth in late October 2010 to a baby girl, a “source” said in the report. “She gave birth to a baby girl later that year, and Justin didn’t know anything about it. She just wanted to protect her baby. She wanted to keep her and her family away from any spotlight,” the source said. “In my opinion, she does look a lot like Justin did at that same age.” To take it a step further, the tabloid printed alleged texts between Bieber and the woman after their supposed hook-up where he says “thanks 4 last night” and calls it “Our little secret?”
Long story short, Justin Bieber is a wigger douche who needs his teeth kicked in. Picking up chick's at T.G.I. Fridays can be added to the long list of reasons why.
Amy Adams Pantyhose Upskirt on her Movie Set (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
Bill Clinton has still got it [The Superficial]
Eliza Dushku Is Still Dating Rick Fox [Popoholic]
Carmen Ortega’s Busty Sexy Photoshoot [Hollywood Tuna]
Anne Hathaway Has Brown Hair Again [Dlisted]
Sara Underwood And Her Naked Ass Are Pefection (NSFW) [MyEx]
Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Tisdale are not soldiers (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Harper Beckham is still the cutest celebrity baby [Lainey Gossip]
Kelly Osbourne wants kids: ‘I do want babies, but I don’t want a great big vagina’ [Celebitchy]
Taylor Swift Before & After Photo [Moe Jackson]
Paul Giamatti on the set of The Amazing Spider-Man 2 [Film Drunk]
A bunch of pretty people were in Monaco over the weekend [Celebslam]
Babes of the French Open 2013 [COED Magazine]
Corey Feldman Imitated Michael Jackson With Limp Bizkit [The Blemish]
Someone Threw Underwear At Lana Del Rey [Evil Beet Gossip]
Joss Whedon Vows Silence on Avengers 2 Villain [Crave Online]
Amanda Bynes’ bong or vase? You decide! [Popbytes]
I was going to recap the Amanda Bynes weekend crazy today, but Fish already recapped the shit out of it (so read it here), but remember when she said NYPD officers sexually assaulted her and "slapped her vagina"? Yeah, apparently we're you're insane you think invisible hands are touching your genitalia. E! Online reports:
But on Tuesday, after conducting their own investigation, the NYPD fired back against the actress's allegations and denied any wrongdoing.
"NYPD Internal Affairs investigators have found no evidence to corroborate Ms. Bynes' allegations," Deputy Commissioner Paul J. Browne told E! News in a statement. "To the contrary, a credible civilian witness who was with the officers throughout told investigators that none touched Ms. Bynes inappropriately or otherwise engaged in misconduct at any time."
So at what point now do Ben Kingsley and Mark Ruffalo get involved? It has to be soon right? It has to be.