Miley Cyrus Is Drunk, LinksBy toddMarch 14, 2011

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Yeah, the Khloe & Lamar promo shots aren’t altered in any way. Nope, not at all. [Celebuzz]
Miley Cyrus is piss drunk [The Superficial]
Vanessa Hudgens. Damn. [Popoholic]
Krista and Karissa Shannon are very classy [Celebslam]
Adrianne Curry‘s ass on Twitter again [TaxiDriver Movie]
Kate Middleton in a bikini [Drunken Stepfather]
What women will do for beads (ed.’s note: ANYTHING) [COED Magazine]
Facebook Albums: Slut Edition [The Chive]
Emma Watson dropped out of college [Cele|bitchy]
Charlie Sheen has a live tour [The Blemish]
Chris Brown was smoking weed while driving [Allie Is Wired]
Some guy has a picture of Jake Gyllenhaal‘s dong. Of course. [Amy Grindhouse]
Kim Kardashian is a flapper [Evil Beet Gossip]
Catrinel Menghia. That is all. [Heyman Hustle]

Yeah, the Khloe & Lamar promo shots aren’t altered in any way. Nope, not at all. [Celebuzz] Miley Cyrus is piss drunk [The Superficial] Vanessa Hudgens. Damn. [Popoholic] Krista and…

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Kate Upton. That Is All.By toddMarch 14, 2011

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I’m as late as Miley Cyrus’ period on these, but since the imaginary clause in my contract says I must post every Kate Upton picture that exists, here are some more outtakes (even more here) from her SI Swimsuit photoshoot. Sooo…does God still get high fives because of her rack? Did he autograph it somewhere? A Saudi prince hasn’t bought her yet? How does all this work?

I’m as late as Miley Cyrus’ period on these, but since the imaginary clause in my contract says I must post every Kate Upton picture that exists, here are some…

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Charlie Sheen Has Died Four Times In The Last Six MonthsBy toddMarch 14, 2011

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When he’s not busy winning and riding a mercury surfboard into a puddle of tiger blood, Charlie Sheen spends the rest of his time dying then being brought back to life. The Enquirer reports:

The drug-addled Two and a Half Men star – whose bizarre lifestyle and insane rants have become a national spectacle recently – grew so concerned that his routine cocaine benders would end in his death that he’s become a regular user of nitroglycerin tablets, say sources. The tablets contain a chemical compound commonly used to prevent cardiac arrest. “Since Charlie’s latest tailspin began in October, he’s suffered at least four potentially fatal cocaine overdoses – maybe even more – but his life was saved each time by people who rushed to his side and rescued him,” an insider told The ENQUIRER. The actor’s overdoses have become so predictable that he now actually plans for them in advance, continued the insider. Charlie reportedly carries sublingual (under the tongue) nitroglycerin pills with him when he’s using cocaine. When his drug intake reaches the point that his heart rate starts to increase dramatically, Charlie pops a pill – believing it prevents a deadly heart attack, says the insider. But on at least four occasions, Charlie – who has been fired by CBS and Warner Bros. from “Two and a Half Men” – has found himself in a life-or-death situation when he couldn’t get to the pills on time, maintains the insider. In each case, someone had to come to the 45-year-old actor’s aid after he collapsed in his home. During three of the episodes, an assistant or a friend in the home found Charlie “strewn across the floor, sweating bullets, while he was going in and out of consciousness,” continued the insider. “Luckily, they got to him in time and were able to get a nitroglycerin pill under his tongue,” which revived him.

Who is this assistant or friend? Are they in a union? How can they expect me to make any money in my dead pool if they save this idiot drug addict every time he can’t handle his blow? If somebody can find them and tell them to make their check out to “Todd”, I’d really appreciate it. I also accept PayPal. Or gift cards from a selective list of online businesses.

When he’s not busy winning and riding a mercury surfboard into a puddle of tiger blood, Charlie Sheen spends the rest of his time dying then being brought back to…

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Jenny McCarthy Understands BikinisBy toddMarch 14, 2011

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Jenny McCarthy was in Miami Beach this weekend and while she was there she tweeted constantly about how the paparazzi were hounding her and not letting her relax. Which, of course, means she loved the attention and wanted everyone to know that people still give a shit about her. When she’s not killing children with her reactionary, completely insane ramblings about Autism sheHOLY SHIT LOOK AT HER TITS! Sorry. I got sidetracked for a second there.

Jenny McCarthy was in Miami Beach this weekend and while she was there she tweeted constantly about how the paparazzi were hounding her and not letting her relax. Which, of…

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