Linda Hamilton Is Coming Back To ‘Terminator’ Franchise AgainBy toddSeptember 20, 2017
Linda Hamilton Is Coming Back To ‘Terminator’ Franchise Again

 

Since every corpse has to be dug up and put in front of a camera so studios can cash in on your nostalgia (what up, Jamie Lee Curtis , every recent Harrison Ford movie, and Pennywise ), Linda Hamilton is returning to the Terminator franchise for the first time since 1991.

After waving hasta la vista, baby, more than 25 years ago, Linda Hamilton is returning to the world of Terminator, reuniting with James Cameron, the creator of the sci-fi franchise, for the new installment being made by Skydance and Paramount. Cameron made the announcement at a private event celebrating the storied franchise, saying, “As meaningful as she was to gender and action stars everywhere back then, it’s going to make a huge statement to have that seasoned warrior that she’s become return.” With Hamilton’s return, Cameron hopes to once again make a statement on gender roles in action movies. “There are 50-year-old, 60-year-old guys out there killing bad guys,” he said, referring to aging male actors still anchoring movies, “but there isn’t an example of that for women.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger is 70 and Linda Hamilton is 60, so who knows what the plot of this movie will be. Maybe it’s 2029 and they go back in time to save Medicaid.

  Since every corpse has to be dug up and put in front of a camera so studios can cash in on your nostalgia (what up, Jamie Lee Curtis , every…
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Kathy Griffin Is Super EdgyBy toddMay 31, 2017
Kathy Griffin Is Super Edgy

 

While liberals dropped their vapes over a dog statue peeing on a girl statue and hate crimeterrorism because the guy was white, conservatives clutched their pearls and free healthcare for all accidentally fell out a because they were so shocked that Kathy Griffin and artist Tyler Shields went full ISIS video in mocking Donald Trump. Here’s her reasoning from her now deleted Instagram post. It didn’t go over well.

Here’s my artsy fartsy statement! I’m mocking the guy who mocks everybody. EVERYBODY (well, not the Russians so much) Anywhoo…If you could’ve seen us trying to fashion a Trump mask…haha We started playing around w props, etc, so I shall title this work “there was blood coming out of his eyes, blood coming out of his…WHEREVER.” OBVIOUSLY…I do not condone or encourage any of my fans / followers or ANYONE to cause harm to ANYONE. Verbally or otherwise. KG.

Trump or Obama or anyone, is it really a good idea to joke about killing the President? Is that something you really out here trying to to do? You too, Ted Nugent. Dumbass. In their defense, most of my fellow liberals called Kathy Griffin an idiot (shout out to Chelsea Clinton). I don’t know what Lena Dunham had to say, but I assume it was this.  Kathy Griffin was basking in her newfound relevance until the Secret Service was like, “oh”, then Kathy put on her worse wig to make an apology video.

 

 

Now there’s outrage over the outrage because there’s always something WORSE going on in the world. Specifically, the political narrative you were trying to push before this pic dropped. You’re all pretty stupid.

 

It’s ok, boo.

 

  While liberals dropped their vapes over a dog statue peeing on a girl statue and hate crimeterrorism because the guy was white, conservatives clutched their pearls and free healthcare for…

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Halle Berry Will Go Topless For SnacksBy toddMarch 31, 2017
Halle Berry Will Go Topless For Snacks

 

Google “Halle Berry” and about 65% of the results will just stories about her being insane and a borderline psychopath, but we’re still talking about Halle Berry. She’s been longer than most of you reading this have been alive. And she’ll get topless if you come over and bring snacks.

(more…)

  Google “Halle Berry” and about 65% of the results will just stories about her being insane and a borderline psychopath, but we’re still talking about Halle Berry. She’s been…

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Charli XCX Is The DevilBy toddOctober 28, 2016

The Kiss FM Haunted House Party was last night, and Charli XCX dressed up like a devil in a bikini. Not the metaphorical kind. Not sure what her demonic power is, but if I had to guess, it appears to be recent weight loss. Hail, Satan.

The Kiss FM Haunted House Party was last night, and Charli XCX dressed up like a devil in a bikini. Not the metaphorical kind. Not sure what her demonic power is, but…

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The 86th Annual Academy Awards Were Last NightBy toddMarch 03, 2014
The 86th Annual Academy Awards Were Last Night

 

As my brilliant title suggests, the 86th Annual Academy Awards were last night, and before we get into everything, here's the list of winners that you care about. Please note that Sound Mixing and Cinematography are not listed. Mostly because I have no idea what those things are. What does mixing stuff with cinnamon have to do with a making a movie? It just makes no sense. Also, Matthew McConaughey is damn handsome man. I can admit that.

 

BEST PICTURE: 12 Years a Slave

BEST ACTOR: Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club

ACTRESS: Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine

SUPPORTING ACTOR: Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club

SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years a Slave

DIRECTOR: Alfonso Cuarón, Gravity

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: John Ridley, 12 Years a Slave

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Spike Jonze, Her

  As my brilliant title suggests, the 86th Annual Academy Awards were last night, and before we get into everything, here's the list of winners that you care about. Please…

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Muslims Hate Katy Perry NowBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

Katy Perry is probably the furthest thing from what Jesus had in mind when he made people climb a mountain to hear him talk. Apparently Jesus also wanted people to get exercise, but then he gave them a bunch of bread. Carbs? Make up your mind, Jesus! Damn.  Also, a mountain? Nice acoustics, jackass. Anyway, like most Christians, Katy Perry likes to pull out the Christian card when it fits her needs, and she sees herself as some evolved spiritualist who embraces all faiths and religions, but mostly those people just smoke a lot of weed. But for her music video for "Dark Horse", she did a thing that pissed off Muslims. That's always a good idea.

A number of Muslim netizens around the world are upset with her music video and are insulted by a scene in which Katy was seen destroying a man with his pendant depicting the Arabic word for "Allah".  Petitions for Youtube to bring down the music video have also been issued by Muslim netizens.

A person who wasn't Muslim mentioned the word "Allah" in something, so naturally there's petitions going around to have this video removed and Katy Perry beheaded or stoned or whatever Muslims do to women who won't have sex with them. Hey, man. Try a few compliments and maybe a nice dinner. Also, make her laugh. All religions are dumb and make no sense, but one thing they all do well is wait for the chance to get offended. Religious people love that shit. They also always want you to join because if you join, that means they aren't as crazy because it sounded like a good idea to you too. But Islam? Nah, brah. I can't fuck with a religion that promises you get to bang 1,000 virgins when you get to heaven. Sorry. That sounds mad boring. I don't have time to sit down and have a talk to explain things a thousand times. If you could just bend over and let me pull your arms behind your back so I can use you as a counterweight without me having to use a logistics flow process diagram that would be ideal.

  Katy Perry is probably the furthest thing from what Jesus had in mind when he made people climb a mountain to hear him talk. Apparently Jesus also wanted people…

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There’s A Yeezus Movie Coming OutBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

If you feel like paying money to sit in the dark and listen to Kanye West tell you how great Kanye West is for two hours, you're in luck, because he released the trailer for his upcoming movie Yeezus yesterday on his official site. It looks like a  concert film, but Brett Easton Ellis wrote a script for it, so there's a good chance it'll have a serial killer and a gay dude in it at some point. Also, somebody might have AIDS or be hooked on heroin and speak in run on sentences that last five pages. The last movie Ellis wrote could only cast Lindsay Lohan and a porn star, so let's try to keep our expectations low. Not sure if Kim Kardashian will be in it or not, but I imagine Kanye West in a fur coat will get more screen time than that bar that runs at the bottom of Sportscenter.

  If you feel like paying money to sit in the dark and listen to Kanye West tell you how great Kanye West is for two hours, you're in luck,…

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Do Not Attempt To Grab Justin Timberlake’s AssBy toddFebruary 28, 2014

 

Justin Timberlake took his 20/20 Experience tour to Philly on Tuesday, and since Philly is a shit hole of degenerates and drunks, of course someone would attempt to sexually assault him. You can clearly see Timberlake slap a hand away twice and give the face the hand belongs to a stare down, then he just dances away. Note: Dancing away after an attempted unwarranted sexual advance has not been shown as an effective rape prevention tool. Us here at IDLYITW suggest you contact the authorities immediately if you or someone you know is the victim of a sexual assault. But do not dance to the phone.

  Justin Timberlake took his 20/20 Experience tour to Philly on Tuesday, and since Philly is a shit hole of degenerates and drunks, of course someone would attempt to sexually…

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Mila Kunis And Ashton Kutcher Are EngagedBy toddFebruary 28, 2014
Mila Kunis And Ashton Kutcher Are Engaged

 

Mila Kunis was spotted with a big ass diamond on her ring finger, so I guess this means she's engaged to Ashton Kutcher. We'll play along.

You are not about to be punk'd. Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis are engaged, E! News exclusively confirms. Kunis was spotted shopping earlier today wearing a diamond ring on that finger, and a source tells us that she and her former That '70s Show costar are indeed planning to make it official.

They've been dating for two years, so I guess this might be true or she just likes big ass diamonds. But two years is plenty of time for Kutcher to have seen her without makeup, and if you haven't seen Kunis without makeup, I suggest you get a night light and check under your bed before you go to sleep because its the stuff of goddamn nightmares. Seriously. You'd bring your pets inside if you saw a Mila Kunis without makeup in your backyard. Hopefully Sephora was mentioned in the prenup.

  Mila Kunis was spotted with a big ass diamond on her ring finger, so I guess this means she's engaged to Ashton Kutcher. We'll play along. You are not…

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Drake Wants To Play Obama In A MovieBy toddJanuary 30, 2012

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“Obama doesn’t have gills, so I’m tryin’ to get that worked in ya heard?”

Drake, a Canadian and rapper whose only street cred in being shot by a classmate at Degrassi High, wants to play Barack Obama in a movie. Because he “wants to do something for his culture”. Rich Canadians are crying out for a Obama movie? I don’t know. Also, he’s Canadian did I mention that? New York Post reports:

“I hope somebody makes a movie about Obama’s life soon because I could play him. That’s the goal,” the rapper told VH1 News at the Sundance Film Festival earlier this week…“I watch all the addresses,” he says. “Any time I see him on TV, I don’t change the channel. I definitely pay attention and listen to the inflections of his voice. If you ask anyone who knows me, I’m pretty good at impressions.”…”I’ve been reading scripts for awhile,” he said. “I want to do something great. I want to do something for my culture: The younger people who are still in tune with everything going on. I’m actually writing with my friends right now.”

I’m sure Drake is serious when he says he’s pretty good at impressions, because he does a pretty good job of impersonating a rapper because I assume it’s hard to rap about your Bar Mitzvah and growing up in Toronto’s wealthiest neighborhood with your mommy. Also, why are his eyes so far apart? His private pool didn’t have a lifeguard when he was a kid? Actually, Drake having Downs makes more and more sense when you think about it. Nice Britney eyes, jackass.

“Obama doesn’t have gills, so I’m tryin’ to get that worked in ya heard?” Drake, a Canadian and rapper whose only street cred in being shot by a classmate at…

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