If told me that in 2018 a person who didn’t work in the White House would bring shame and embarrassment to America, I wouldn’t have believed you. Now that we know it was Fergie, it kinda makes sense in retrospect. Anyway, her National Anthem performancewas so bad, she had to release a statement to TMZ.
“I’ve always been honored and proud to perform the national anthem and last night I wanted to try something special for the NBA. I’m a risk taker artistically, but clearly this rendition didn’t strike the intended tone. I love this country and honestly tried my best.“
Like, did you though? If this was your best, maybe decline the offer and let a cat being strangled give it a shot.
According to Mueller, we’re pretty much all Russian bots now because we mostly get our news from memes, so I’m not sure if a movie glamorizing the effectiveness of a Russian spy is what Hollywood needs to be sending out into the world right now, but here we are. Jennifer Lawrence attended the Red Sparrow photocall with her boobs out to distract us from the fact that she’s a Russian spy in the movie. She really has a career in politics.
It’s easy to forget to how hot Christina Aguilera was before the Latin genes and having a bunch of kids caught up to her, but she wants to remind you in Instagram with a few pics in black and white that she took in very low lighting with several filters. You know, much like your Instagram pics. The rack still looks great and what an amazing bathtub. Very decadent.
Black Panther is making all the money right now and Disney has pledged to take 25% of the profits to help the black community. Haha jk, Disney is going to keep all of it because they are a soulless media conglomerate. Wakanda profits forever. But Chadwick Boseman and director Ryan Coogler are profiled (in a good way) in the latest issue of Rolling Stone, and that’s really great. You should also see the movie, because it’s also pretty great except the CGI.
Man, what a wild Black History Month it’s been so far. The 2018 NBA All-Star Game was last night and Fergie paid tribute to famous black singer Jessica Rabbit with her stunning rendition of the National Anthem. After performing, Fergie immediately fled the country and is now seeking asylum at the Embassy of Ecuador in London. My sources haven’t confirmed this yet, but she probably also deleted her Twitter.
Man, what a wild Black History Month it’s been so far. The 2018 NBA All-Star Game was last night and Fergie paid tribute to famous black singer Jessica Rabbit…
Jennifer Lawrence basically plays John Wick in Red Sparrow, but since it’s a woman John Wick, Hollywood had to make her a prostitute instead of just a woman John Wick. Oh, I’m sorry. They made her a “seductive Russian spy.” Not the same thing. My apologies. I remember in Taken when Liam Neeson had to put on a low cut dress and give one of those guys a handjob to find out where his daughter was. Pretty intense scene. Also, lol at Jennifer Lawrence’s Russian accent.
Of course Justin Bieber went to fashion week, because besides being a wigger, he's also effiminate with a leopard print car. But it looks like his testosterone shots are starting to work, because he showed up with what some people are calling a mustache. Not sure why he thought this was a good idea, but maybe it was a practical decision. For instance, he wants hostesses to stop giving him crayons when he's seated or he wants Michael Jackson's ghost to stop coming in his room at night.
Of course Justin Bieber went to fashion week, because besides being a wigger, he's also effiminate with a leopard print car. But it looks like his testosterone shots are starting…