Kate Upton Has A ‘Very Serious’ BoyfriendBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

Kate Upton has been dating Maksim Chernobyl (his name spellchecks to a nuclear disaster) for a while now, but I guess now they actually wany people to know. People reports:

When Kate Upton was spotted holding hands with former Dancing with the Stars pro Maksim Chmerkovskiy in New York City recently, the Sports Illustrated cover girl was showing off her new boyfriend. Yep, it's official and a source close to the couple tells PEOPLE, "They are very serious." But the pair, who met through a mutual friend about six months ago, started off as friends, the source says. "Along the way," the source says, "it turned into something else."

Haha, yes, they started off a friends. Of course. Because 33-year old dudes always talk to dumb 20-year old blondes with massize tits because they make great friends. They make the best friends. They've probably dated this long because he's convinced her that his semen is ice cream.

Kate Upton has been dating Maksim Chernobyl (his name spellchecks to a nuclear disaster) for a while now, but I guess now they actually wany people to know. People reports:…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Kim Kardashian And Her Boobs Are BackBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

I'm still recovering from last night's brilliant series finale of Breaking Bad which poetically showed Walter White die where Heisenberg was born (Sorry, if you don't want spoilers, stay off the Internet. The world doesn't revolve around you, bitch), but we deal with tits here, so here's Kim Kardashian still trying to make you think she's hot even though she's a 32-year old, unmarried mom of a child whose father had another psychotic break last week. I don't know about you guys, but I can barely even contain my erection.

I'm still recovering from last night's brilliant series finale of Breaking Bad which poetically showed Walter White die where Heisenberg was born (Sorry, if you don't want spoilers, stay off…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Katherine Webb Ate A CheeseburgerBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

 

When you're a Christian, you never know what God's plan might be for you, so how lucky is Katherine Webb that God wanted her to show his light by having simulated sex with a  Carl's Jr. Buffalo Blue Cheeseburger and causing men to commit adultery in their hearts. I tried mastubating to this, but then I realized after they stopped filming she stuck her finger down her throat. Haha, you won't fool me, Satan!

  When you're a Christian, you never know what God's plan might be for you, so how lucky is Katherine Webb that God wanted her to show his light by…

Related Posts:

Tags:
India Reynolds Says Happy Monday, LinksBy toddSeptember 30, 2013
India Reynolds Says Happy Monday, Links

 

Blerta Needs To Be An Actual Character On Girls [Dlisted]

Russell Brand Made Katy Perry Want to Die [Fishwrapper]

Angelina Jolie's Perky New Boobs Look GOOD! (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Khloe Kardashian's Marriage Is Going Well [The Superficial]

Britney Spears Work Bitch Video Teaser [Hollywood Tuna]

Scarlett Johansson’s New “Don Jon” Promotional Photos Are Bodaciously Sexy [Popoholic]

Chelsea Handler in a bikini (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]

Aaron Paul's "Breaking Bad" finale party at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery was totally badass [TMZ]

Adele might play Dusty Springfield [Lainey Gossip]

Kim Kardashian was ‘sad’ to leave North at home while flying to Paris Fashion Week [Celebitchy]

Maria Menounos vs. Jessica Alba vs. Renee Bargh: Rear-View Matchup [Moe Jackson]

Rush totally bombed [Film Drunk]

Kelly Rowland's fake breasts are the fulfillment of a childhood dream [Celebslam

Check Out These Badass MacGyver Bongs [COED Magazine]

Lamar Odom Thinks Money Will Solve Everything [The Blemish]

Vanilla Ice Agrees With Miley Cyrus, Thinks Justin Bieber Is A D-Bag [Evil Beet Gossip]

Next Harry Potter Feature Could Be a Quidditch Movie [Crave Online]

Miley Cyrus thinks cocaine is gross but loves weed [Popbytes]

Model Attacked By Topless Protestors At Paris Fashion Week [Hollywood Life]

Rihanna Broke Herself [Blaberazzi]

 

Pic source = Instagram

  Blerta Needs To Be An Actual Character On Girls [Dlisted] Russell Brand Made Katy Perry Want to Die [Fishwrapper] Angelina Jolie's Perky New Boobs Look GOOD! (NSFW site) [Taxi…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Kelly Brook Is Doing This WrongBy jessJanuary 10, 2012

[Gallery not found]

Don’t worry, it’s not child bearing. Kelly Brook is famous for two reasons, and she covered both of them up this week. She may want to reconsider. I don’t think the Meisner technique would work as well as a V-neck in her auditions for the sequels to such fine art as Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo and Piranha.

Don’t worry, it’s not child bearing. Kelly Brook is famous for two reasons, and she covered both of them up this week. She may want to reconsider. I don’t think…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Milink KunisBy jessJanuary 09, 2012

[SinglePic not found]

AnnaLynne McCord nipslip [Taxidriver Movie]
Justin Bieber is at the beach [The Superficial]
Candice Swanepoel in bikinis [Popoholic]
Jay-Z may have named his baby after his ex [Celebitchy]
Beyonce had a miscarriage before Blue [The Blemish]
Elle Richie is topless [Zoo Today]
Irina Shayk wins [Coed Magazine]
Rihanna is enthused [Cityrag]
Snooki wants to rape Lady Gaga [Dlisted]
Zooey Deschanel is too indie to smile [I’m Not Obsessed]
Lauren Stoner in a bikini [Moe Jackson]
Britney Spears is remixed [Popbytes]
Scarlett Johansson is selling something [Egotastic]
Beyonce pissed off breast feeders [Allie Is Wired]
Delicious [The Chive]
Jessica Simpson is ready to drop [Popcrush]
Blue Ivy is not in the Illuminati [Popcrush]
Charlize Theron has an amazing dress [A Socialite’s Life]
Kim Kardashian wants to sue her own boycott site [Amy Grindhouse]
RuPaul is not Ron Paul [Tabloid Prodigy]
Blue Ivy gift suggestions [Best Week Ever]
Judah Friedlander has my vote [Huffington Post]
Christina Milian is adjustable [Hollywood Tuna]
Katy Perry backs out of People’s Choice Awards [Celebuzz]
Selena Gomez is a cash cow [Celebslam]
Snoop Dogg is predictable [Evil Beet]

Follow us [Facebook][Twitter][Todd’s Formspring] [Jess’s Formspring][Todd][Jess]

AnnaLynne McCord nipslip [Taxidriver Movie] Justin Bieber is at the beach [The Superficial] Candice Swanepoel in bikinis [Popoholic] Jay-Z may have named his baby after his ex [Celebitchy] Beyonce had…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Katy Perry’s Parents Are ConfusedBy jessJanuary 09, 2012

[SinglePic not found]

Christian-when-convenient divorcee Katy Perry‘s parents, Keith and Mary Hudson, are capitalizing on their daughter’s split from Russell Brand to get people to donate to their collection plates. Per TMZ:

Perry’s mom, Mary, speaking for the first time about the split, told parishioners, “I’m sure Katy is trending on the internet just to get you to church tonight. I mean all over the world, who knows how God is bringing them in? The most important thing is you are here and God wants to put the fire in you in 2012.”

Oh, and her dad hates Jews, according to The Sun:

Keith Hudson told hundreds of worshippers: “You know how to make the Jew jealous? Have some money, honey. “You go to LA and they own all the Rolex and diamond places. Walk down a part of LA where we live and it is so rich it smells. You ever smell rich? They are all Jews, hallelujah. Amen.” His sick blast came in a sermon where he also spoke about pop singer Katy, 27. He said: “People say ‘How is it you have a daughter raised in the church and she sang ‘I kissed a girl and liked it’? I say ‘I don’t know’.” Keith and wife Mary, both 63, gave their first services at Church on the Rise in Westlake, Ohio, since Katy and Russell Brand, 36, announced their divorce. Later there was a collection for the Hudsons. Keith added: “We live by the Gospel, not off anyone else, even though you may say ‘You are the parents of Katy Perry, you must be rich.’ No, she is, I am not, hallelujah.”

I was going to count the contradictions in Keith Hudson’s sermons, but instead I counted how many times he mentions or shows his whipped cream-tittied daughter in this promo video. Not including the title (“Keith Hudson – Father of Katy Perry – LIVE at FaithWorld THIS WEEK!”), he and his wife mention or show Katy Perry once for each of the Bible’s deadly sins. I could care less about hate speech (because it’s a component of free speech), but his is just boring and unoriginal. At least Mel Gibson gave the world “sugartits.”

Christian-when-convenient divorcee Katy Perry‘s parents, Keith and Mary Hudson, are capitalizing on their daughter’s split from Russell Brand to get people to donate to their collection plates. Per TMZ: Perry’s…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Leonardo DiCaprio Is Playing With Erin Heatherton’s MindBy toddJanuary 06, 2012

[SinglePic not found]

Erin Heatherton must still be on the fence about anal, because Leonardo DiCaprio has pulled the classic “you want to meet my mother?” He’s so in there! New York Post reports:

Leonardo DiCaprio and Victoria’s Secret model Erin Heatherton can’t keep their hands off each other. “It is nonstop PDA,” a source said of their hot-and-heavy relationship. DiCaprio introduced Heatherton to his mother, Irmelin, over a well-behaved New Year’s Day brunch at the Four Seasons Hotel in Los Angeles. “The meeting went well, and Mom and Erin were seen laughing,” our source said. Leo is very close to his mom, whose approval is key to his relationships.

The last time we saw Erin Heatherton, she was spending $1,700 in lingerie just so she could get on Leo’s plane, now she’s probably masturbating to Titanic right after she called all her friends and told them to save the date because her and Leo are getting married soon and omg we’re going to Maldives guys and then we’ll have two kids one boy and one girl and I’ll dress them up and we’ll have two dogs and a cat or two cats and a dog but I don’t know because Leo loves polar bears so we may get one of those or a bird and what color should the nursery be blue I’m thinking blue no pink oh and my last name will be DiCaprio and I’ll be a great mother and great wife because Leo introduced me to his mother and I can totally tell she loves me oh god I think my ovaries just dropped leo leo leo married leo leo leo pregnant leo. “Hey, when does this chick turn 25 again? Three years? Let’s save that date instead.” – Leonardo DiCaprio

To understand the true mentality of us men, start at 7:07:

Erin Heatherton must still be on the fence about anal, because Leonardo DiCaprio has pulled the classic “you want to meet my mother?” He’s so in there! New York Post…

Related Posts:

Tags: ,
Adele Went On Vacation With Her New BoyfriendBy toddJanuary 06, 2012

[SinglePic not found]

So I guess we can expect 23 some timesoon then? Page Six reports:

Adele and Simon Konecki were spotted in the Everglades National Park, getting on an airboat for an alligator-spotting tour. Adele wore a printed caftan over black leggings and had a smile across her face as Konecki, in a red hoodie, embraced her. Konecki then pulled the “Rolling in the Deep” singer in for a kiss.

I bet he’s really handsome.

Konecki, 36, operates an English charity called Drop4Drop. He is stocky and sports a full beard. But it may be his sense of humor that drew Adele to him. In a recent interview with trade publication The Grocer, Konecki was asked which celebrity he would hire to work for his company. “Snoop Dogg,” replied Konecki. “To answer the phones with his dulcet tones.” He is a dead ringer for hairy Hangover actor Zach Galifianakis — who Adele told The Sun she fancied last year. Simon, 36 — boss of Brighton-based charity Drop4Drop — joined Londoner Adele on a trip to the Everglades National Park near Miami. He made her giggle as they strolled on a beach before boarding an alligator-spotting airboat. So it’s no wonder she snapped him up. Adele, whose split from a previous boyfriend inspired her biggest hits, also told The Sun: “If they make me laugh, I’m in the bed.” (ed.’s note: Ladies?)

I like how the article thinly suggests that Adele’s boyfriend is ugly and fat yet she only condescended to go out with him because he makes her laugh. Yep, that’s the only reason. She could have her pick of male models or A-list actors, but she just wants the guy who makes her laugh. Totally. It couldn’t have anything do with the fact that they probably just closed down a Cracker Barrel together before they got on the airboat. Let’s not get carried away here, New York Post.

Note: Also, there’s really no need to include the phrase “Adele wore black leggings” in any more of your articles. That part was already assumed.

So I guess we can expect 23 some timesoon then? Page Six reports: Adele and Simon Konecki were spotted in the Everglades National Park, getting on an airboat for an…

Related Posts:

Tags:
Lisa Lampanelli Is MadBy jessJanuary 06, 2012

[SinglePic not found]

Lisa Lampanelli is mad at NBC for giving her shitty Knicks tickets. For free. TMZ reports:

Lisa Lampanelli is demanding a “BIG F**KING APOLOGY” from NBC … claiming the network completely disrespected her at the NY Knicks game last night … in front of thousands of people. Lisa — who was just announced as a contestant on the upcoming “Celebrity Apprentice” — had just completed a hardcore day of promoting the show … when she WENT OFF on the peacock. Lampanelli says she was invited to Madison Square Garden along with two of her co-stars — former Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza and “Real Housewives” star Teresa Giudice. But when they got the tickets, Lisa says Dayana and Teresa were placed in the front row … while Lisa was forced to sit all the way in the back. Obviously, Lisa was PISSED.“I said, REALLY?? Well, guess what NBC … you owe me a big f**king apology.” She unloaded, “You think anyone is watching that ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ for anybody except me and a couple other people who really keep the ball rolling?”
“I’ll expect my gift basket with your apology and some GOOD Knicks tickets tomorrow .. ’cause I killed myself for you for 18 hours today.” And the worst part of all … the front row seat next to Teresa and Dayana was EMPTY!!!

I couldn’t tell at first what annoyed me most about this story. It wasn’t the fact that she took it so personally because there’s no possible way that a clerical error may have occurred that separated Lisa Lampanelli’s ticket from her costars, and no chance whatsoever that the seat may have been reserved for someone else who happened to not show up. Then I considered the overwhelming sense of entitlement it takes to complain about a freebie. But I finally realized the dumbest part of this whole thing isn’t that Lisa Lampanelli thinks she deserves free courtside tickets, or even that she thinks she’s the reason that anyone watches Celebrity Apprentice. It’s the idea that anyone watches Celebrity Apprentice at all.

Lisa Lampanelli is mad at NBC for giving her shitty Knicks tickets. For free. TMZ reports: Lisa Lampanelli is demanding a “BIG F**KING APOLOGY” from NBC … claiming the network…
Tags: