Emily Sears Has A CalendarBy toddDecember 08, 2017
Emily Sears Has A Calendar

 

It’s 2017 and Instagram models are still making calendars for some reason. Emily Sears now has one. I assume it’s not a productivity app. She announced the calendar on Instagram, but I didn’t include the caption because I don’t want to be that involved in the promotion of this thing. If you want to save money and want an actual calendar, just go to her Instagram and print off 12 pictures and make you one. That would probably be the best option in this economy.

 

A post shared by Emily Sears (@emilysears) on

 

If Saudi Arabia was smart, they’d make their woman robot look like Emily Sears and sell them in America and Japan. They’re pretty weird of over there, too.

 

  It’s 2017 and Instagram models are still making calendars for some reason. Emily Sears now has one. I assume it’s not a productivity app. She announced the calendar on…

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Demi Lovato Has A Problem With TIME’s Person Of The YearBy toddDecember 07, 2017
Demi Lovato Has A Problem With TIME’s Person Of The Year

 

There’s really nothing more on brand for Demi Lovato than going on Twitter and shitting on something positive or telling somebody what they should be doing then deleting the tweets later and asking why you think what she tweeted was news because there’s bigger things people should be worried about. So, naturally, she has a take on 2017 TIME’s Person Of The Year.

 

We can assume she’s talking about Taylor Swift here. Or Nicki Minaj. Or any other person she’s passive aggressively shaded on Twitter.

Valid point (the runner-up was Donald Trump).

 

I men, they were on the cover, but still. “It’s annoying that it’s just about impact on the news.” I don’t know what that means. Maybe people who hang around Demi Lovato know. I love Demi, because if she wasn’t famous and had to seem normal, she’d be tweeting about how everyone in Congress are humanoid lizards and how Amazon Echo can read your mind WAKE UP SHEEPLE.

 

  There’s really nothing more on brand for Demi Lovato than going on Twitter and shitting on something positive or telling somebody what they should be doing then deleting the…

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Jessica Chastain’s Game Did The ‘Molly’s Game’ Premiere In MadridBy toddDecember 06, 2017
Jessica Chastain’s Game Did The ‘Molly’s Game’ Premiere In Madrid

 

I haven’t seen Molly’s Game, so somebody let me know if it has a scene where Jessica Chastain walks on a red carpet at some event. That movie would be called Cleavage Game haha I kid, but seriously, she has nice breasts. Hopefully that’s okay to say in this environment. I know her body isn’t a commodity and she has smart brain and she’s a very talented actor and whatnot, but boobs are great. Everyone likes them. Boobs are gender neutral in their ability to be liked and stuff. Boobs. Say it with me.

 

  I haven’t seen Molly’s Game, so somebody let me know if it has a scene where Jessica Chastain walks on a red carpet at some event. That movie would…

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Meet TIME’s Person Of The YearBy toddDecember 06, 2017
Meet TIME’s Person Of The Year

 

Mere hours after The New York Times and The New Yorker dropped bombshell exposes on Harvey Weinstein‘s unhinged and rampant sexual abuse, the #MeToo campaigned was launched and holy shit. Since then, we learned that basically every celebrity dude we like is overestimating how much women want to see their penises. Naturally, TIME’s Person Of The Year for 2017 are “The Silence Breakers”.

This reckoning appears to have sprung up overnight. But it has actually been simmering for years, decades, centuries. Women have had it with bosses and co-workers who not only cross boundaries but don’t even seem to know that boundaries exist. They’ve had it with the fear of retaliation, of being blackballed, of being fired from a job they can’t afford to lose. They’ve had it with the code of going along to get along. They’ve had it with men who use their power to take what they want from women. These silence breakers have started a revolution of refusal, gathering strength by the day, and in the past two months alone, their collective anger has spurred immediate and shocking results: nearly every day, CEOs have been fired, moguls toppled, icons disgraced. In some cases, criminal charges have been brought.

Like, I want to give TIME credit for doing this, but then you realize Time’s editor-in-chief, Edward Felsenthal said Trump was this year’s “runner-up“. That’s like putting Gandalf on the cover then saying Sauron was the runner-up. I don’t get it. Anyway, read the article and watch the video. Pretty powerful stuff. Even if it feels like a calculated marketing move disguised as commentary on a social movement.

 

  Mere hours after The New York Times and The New Yorker dropped bombshell exposes on Harvey Weinstein‘s unhinged and rampant sexual abuse, the #MeToo campaigned was launched and holy…
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Sara Sampaio & Slick Woods Are Your 2017 LOVE Advent CalendarBy toddDecember 06, 2017
Sara Sampaio & Slick Woods Are Your 2017 LOVE Advent Calendar

 

It’s a weekday in December, so that means another 2017 LOVE Advent calendar video until 2018 gets here. I think everyone will be happy when 2018 gets here. But we were also excited for 2017 to get here, so what the hell do we know? We’re dumb. 2018 will probably be apocalyptic hellscape or humans will just evolve by losing the ability to speak or type so we nobody offends anyone. Or even worse, Mike Pence become President. Or John Oliver is accused of sexual harassment. We just don’t know. Wow, went off on a tangent there. Here’s Sara Sampaio doing her version of karate in this video. If you don’t know who Sara Sampaio is, that’s understandable. They’ve been trying to make her happen for like 5 years now. Maybe she should give up.

 

 

Here’s a video of Slick Woods. I don’t know who that is. Based on her teeth, I assume she’s British.

 

 

  It’s a weekday in December, so that means another 2017 LOVE Advent calendar video until 2018 gets here. I think everyone will be happy when 2018 gets here. But…

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Drake Is Banging Jennifer LopezBy toddDecember 24, 2016

<——– Lotta those

A photo posted by champagnepapi (@champagnepapi) on



PSA: I’m awake because if Carrie Fisher died, I was gonna post about it. But she’s not dead, so I’m gonna post a story I was gonna post on Tuesday but forgot because somebody brought over burritos. I’m going to post it now. The post is about Drake and Jennifer Lopez. You probably figured that out already though.

Drake and Jennifer Lopez might be more than just friends. A week after the 30-year-old rapper visited Lopez in Las Vegas for her residency return at Planet Hollywood, the two were spotted spending a little time together in Los Angeles on Monday night.  An eyewitness tells ET that Drake and Lopez, 47, stepped out for an intimate dinner at West Hollywood hot spot Delilah. While the two did dine with a small group of friends, the eyewitness says that Drake and J.Lo appeared to be on a date.

I’m not really a fan of Drake’s pussy begging music, but if Jennifer Lopez asks you to bang her, you do it. I had more planned for this post, but it’s Christmas Eve. Make up your own.

 

<——– Lotta those A photo posted by champagnepapi (@champagnepapi) on Dec 11, 2016 at 3:48am PST PSA: I’m awake because if Carrie Fisher died, I was gonna post about it….

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Justin Bieber Is Very GracefulBy toddDecember 22, 2016

Justin Bieber went on a hike yesterday in Los Angeles. These are pictures of him falling and busting his ass. This is the second time this has happened this year. Why you gotta tease us like that, 2016? We know what you’re capable of, dude. Step your damn game up. Look at all those rocks in these pictures. You can’t give us one subdural hematoma? Fuck you, buddy.

Justin Bieber went on a hike yesterday in Los Angeles. These are pictures of him falling and busting his ass. This is the second time this has happened this year….

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Hilary Duff: Thick Ass Mom 3By toddDecember 22, 2016

In what appears to be my weekly installment of Hilary Duff: Thick Ass Mom, here’s Hilary Duff leaving some type of workout out place. It’s Studio City, so there’s no telling what they hell they do in there. Probably some type of strip pilates that’s supposed to benefit Aleppo and shelter dogs or some shit. Whatever it is, it’s not making her ass any smaller. In fact, it’s making it exponentially larger. Maybe this place makes their own dough. No way to be sure until we send an investigative team in. I feel the public needs to know.

In what appears to be my weekly installment of Hilary Duff: Thick Ass Mom, here’s Hilary Duff leaving some type of workout out place. It’s Studio City, so there’s no telling…

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Here’s Some 2016 Oscars Red CarpetBy toddFebruary 29, 2016
Here’s Some 2016 Oscars Red Carpet


If you didn’t watch the 2016 Oscars last night, just check your uncle’s Facebook. The butthurt is flowing. I assume Chris Rock has the blood of 20 cops on his hands by now or something. I know Beyonce killed at least 50 last month. Anyway, here’s some red carpet pics.  


If you didn’t watch the 2016 Oscars last night, just check your uncle’s Facebook. The butthurt is flowing. I assume Chris Rock has the blood of 20 cops on his…

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Gigi Hadid Had A Malfunction & LinksBy toddFebruary 29, 2016

Daisy Lowe wore this  ( NSFW )   [  Taxi Driver Movie   ]

Bella Thorne‘s ass in leather pants  [  DrunkenStepfather   ]

Jenna Dewan in a bikini  [   The Superficial   ]

Dakota Fanning seems fine. Totally fine. [  Hollywood Tuna  ]

More Jessica Biel ass at the Spirit Awards  [  Popoholic  ]

Pamela Anderson is naked  ( NSFW site )   [  The Nip Slip   ]

WTF was that Stacey Dash thing about  [  Dlisted   ]

The Batman v Superman script is jank  [  The Blemish  ]

So many selfies, so many  [  Reality Tea  ]

Daisy Lowe wore this  ( NSFW )   [  Taxi Driver Movie   ] Bella Thorne‘s ass in leather pants  [  DrunkenStepfather   ] Jenna Dewan in a bikini  [   The Superficial   ] Dakota Fanning…

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