Chris Hemsworth Is People’s Sexiest Man AliveBy toddNovember 19, 2014
Chris Hemsworth Is People’s Sexiest Man Alive

 

Chris Hemsworth was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive, which is weird because Adam Levine was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive last year and he’s still alive. So is Channing Tatum who they said was the sexiest man alive in 2012, so I guess I’m not familiar with the rules here. But yeah, here’s Chris Hemsworth on the cover. I really wish the media would stop perpetuating unrealistic views and limiting perceptions of men with their “Thor myth” and promoting cultural and gender stereotypes where every man has perfect genes and fantastic hair. lol jk congrats, Chris.

  Chris Hemsworth was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive, which is weird because Adam Levine was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive last year and he’s still alive. So is Channing…

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Alyssa Milano Put A Breastfeeding Pic On InstagramBy toddOctober 28, 2014
Alyssa Milano Put A Breastfeeding Pic On Instagram

 

As humans, we are all collectively okay with seeing other people follow dogs around so they pick up their shit then put in a plastic bag, but if we see a woman with her tit out feeding her baby, we freak the fuck out. I’m not saying I really want to see either, but let’s all just chill on the topic of breastfeeding. It’s not gross, it’s natural. And as long as you don’t keep the titty in the kid’s mouth until it can solve simple mathematical equations, then shut the hell up about it. If you want to complain about something, complain about the fact that when women have kids, they assume that 10 months of chocolate pork rind cravings and elastic pants is enough for a medical degree. Women think they know everything anyway, but when they push another human being out of their vagina, it becomes some next level shit that makes them believe autism can be prevented by mixing pedialyte and coffe creamer or whatever. Anyway, Alyssa Milano posted a pic on Instagram of her breastfeeding her kid with a weird, borderline creepy quote. If this was 1996, I’d be kinda jealous of this kid, but Alyssa Milan is 41 now.

  As humans, we are all collectively okay with seeing other people follow dogs around so they pick up their shit then put in a plastic bag, but if we…
The Taylor Swift Wax Figure Isn’t Creepy At AllBy toddOctober 28, 2014

I thought about going to see Annabelle at some point, but now I guess I don’t have to, because Madame Tussauds just unveiled this new wax figure of Taylor Swift. It’s all dead eyes, high-waisted shorts, and extra money saved from not having to use any wax in the ass. Christ. I think if you say “Taylor Swift” five times in a mirror, this appears behind you holding a cat and a Target bag to ask directions to the nearest pumpkin patch. 

I thought about going to see Annabelle at some point, but now I guess I don’t have to, because Madame Tussauds just unveiled this new wax figure of Taylor Swift….

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Angelina Jolie Does ELLEBy toddMay 08, 2014

Angelina Jolie is on the cover of Elle, and inside she did an interview where she discussed her kids, Brad Pitt, and pretty much everything about her amazing life and career. You can read the interview if you want, but holy damn, look at this photoshoot. If you don't think she's beautiful, please be real with yourself for your reason why. After that, you can Google Jennifer Aniston to find out she still "could get married any day now!". OMG, how exciting! You go, Jennifer!

Angelina Jolie is on the cover of Elle, and inside she did an interview where she discussed her kids, Brad Pitt, and pretty much everything about her amazing life and…

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Amy Jane Brand Says Good Morning, LinksBy toddMay 08, 2014
Amy Jane Brand Says Good Morning, Links

 

Here's Kim Kardashian's thoughts on racism and discrimination  [Dlisted]

Drew Barrymore wishes she had skinnier arms or something  [Fishwrapper]

Lady Gaga naked for V Magazine (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

MTV dropped Farrah Abraham for being a "bad example"  [The Superficial]

Sylvie Meis should stay in a bikini  [Hollywood Tuna]

Emily Blunt looks like this after having a baby [Popoholic]

Madison Murray is so hot [Drunken Stepfather]

Britney Spears' father wants $16K a month from Britney [Celebitchy]

Ellen Page doesn't understand how you could date a man  [Moe Jackson]

The red band trailer for A Million Ways To Die In The West is here  [Film Drunk]

SHAKIRA IN THESE BOOTS  [Celebslam]

Redheads, man. Readheads. [The Chive]

Harry Styles has some dumbass ink [toofab]

 

pic source = Instagram

 

  Here's Kim Kardashian's thoughts on racism and discrimination  [Dlisted] Drew Barrymore wishes she had skinnier arms or something  [Fishwrapper] Lady Gaga naked for V Magazine (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver…

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‘Spring Breakers’ Is Getting A SequelBy toddMay 07, 2014
‘Spring Breakers’ Is Getting A Sequel

 

YES LAWD.

Wild Bunch will also launch Spring Breakers: The Second Coming, in which the Spring Breakers do battle with an extreme militant Christian sect that attempts to convert them. Scottish writer Irvine Welsh has written the screenplay and Swedish Jonus Akerlund will direct. Wild Bunch sold his 2002 film, Spun. “It’s not a direct sequel although there are allusions to some of the characters in the original,” says Maraval, adding there will be a mix of new and old cast in the production. LA-based Muse Productions, which owns the concept to the first film, is producing alongside Wild Bunch and French distributor Mars Films. Follow us: UPROXX on Facebook.

The writer of Trainspotting and the director of Spun. Christ. My boner can only talked down because apparently none of the original cast appear to be coming back. So that means no Ashley Benson bouncing in every scene. This saddens me. To be honest, this saddens me a great deal. Hold me.

 

#neverforget:

 

  YES LAWD. Wild Bunch will also launch Spring Breakers: The Second Coming, in which the Spring Breakers do battle with an extreme militant Christian sect that attempts to convert…

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Kate Upton Has A ‘Very Serious’ BoyfriendBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

Kate Upton has been dating Maksim Chernobyl (his name spellchecks to a nuclear disaster) for a while now, but I guess now they actually wany people to know. People reports:

When Kate Upton was spotted holding hands with former Dancing with the Stars pro Maksim Chmerkovskiy in New York City recently, the Sports Illustrated cover girl was showing off her new boyfriend. Yep, it's official and a source close to the couple tells PEOPLE, "They are very serious." But the pair, who met through a mutual friend about six months ago, started off as friends, the source says. "Along the way," the source says, "it turned into something else."

Haha, yes, they started off a friends. Of course. Because 33-year old dudes always talk to dumb 20-year old blondes with massize tits because they make great friends. They make the best friends. They've probably dated this long because he's convinced her that his semen is ice cream.

Kate Upton has been dating Maksim Chernobyl (his name spellchecks to a nuclear disaster) for a while now, but I guess now they actually wany people to know. People reports:…

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Kim Kardashian And Her Boobs Are BackBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

I'm still recovering from last night's brilliant series finale of Breaking Bad which poetically showed Walter White die where Heisenberg was born (Sorry, if you don't want spoilers, stay off the Internet. The world doesn't revolve around you, bitch), but we deal with tits here, so here's Kim Kardashian still trying to make you think she's hot even though she's a 32-year old, unmarried mom of a child whose father had another psychotic break last week. I don't know about you guys, but I can barely even contain my erection.

I'm still recovering from last night's brilliant series finale of Breaking Bad which poetically showed Walter White die where Heisenberg was born (Sorry, if you don't want spoilers, stay off…

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Katherine Webb Ate A CheeseburgerBy toddSeptember 30, 2013

 

When you're a Christian, you never know what God's plan might be for you, so how lucky is Katherine Webb that God wanted her to show his light by having simulated sex with a  Carl's Jr. Buffalo Blue Cheeseburger and causing men to commit adultery in their hearts. I tried mastubating to this, but then I realized after they stopped filming she stuck her finger down her throat. Haha, you won't fool me, Satan!

  When you're a Christian, you never know what God's plan might be for you, so how lucky is Katherine Webb that God wanted her to show his light by…

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India Reynolds Says Happy Monday, LinksBy toddSeptember 30, 2013
India Reynolds Says Happy Monday, Links

 

Blerta Needs To Be An Actual Character On Girls [Dlisted]

Russell Brand Made Katy Perry Want to Die [Fishwrapper]

Angelina Jolie's Perky New Boobs Look GOOD! (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]

Khloe Kardashian's Marriage Is Going Well [The Superficial]

Britney Spears Work Bitch Video Teaser [Hollywood Tuna]

Scarlett Johansson’s New “Don Jon” Promotional Photos Are Bodaciously Sexy [Popoholic]

Chelsea Handler in a bikini (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]

Aaron Paul's "Breaking Bad" finale party at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery was totally badass [TMZ]

Adele might play Dusty Springfield [Lainey Gossip]

Kim Kardashian was ‘sad’ to leave North at home while flying to Paris Fashion Week [Celebitchy]

Maria Menounos vs. Jessica Alba vs. Renee Bargh: Rear-View Matchup [Moe Jackson]

Rush totally bombed [Film Drunk]

Kelly Rowland's fake breasts are the fulfillment of a childhood dream [Celebslam

Check Out These Badass MacGyver Bongs [COED Magazine]

Lamar Odom Thinks Money Will Solve Everything [The Blemish]

Vanilla Ice Agrees With Miley Cyrus, Thinks Justin Bieber Is A D-Bag [Evil Beet Gossip]

Next Harry Potter Feature Could Be a Quidditch Movie [Crave Online]

Miley Cyrus thinks cocaine is gross but loves weed [Popbytes]

Model Attacked By Topless Protestors At Paris Fashion Week [Hollywood Life]

Rihanna Broke Herself [Blaberazzi]

 

Pic source = Instagram

  Blerta Needs To Be An Actual Character On Girls [Dlisted] Russell Brand Made Katy Perry Want to Die [Fishwrapper] Angelina Jolie's Perky New Boobs Look GOOD! (NSFW site) [Taxi…

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