Kim Kardashian Is Not A PrincessBy jessNovember 30, 2011

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Kim Kardashian told Glamour that thinks she’s not meant to have kids. Via Us Weekly:

“I believe in love and the dream of having a perfect relationship, but my idea of it has changed,” says Kim, 31, who filed for divorce on Oct. 31 after just 72 days of marriage to Humphries, 26. “I think I need to not live in a fairy tale like that. I think I maybe need to just snap out of it and be a little more realistic.” Although happily married sister Khloe, 27, tries to dissuade Kim from those dark thoughts (“I know you will get [love] again,” she says), the mini-mogul says she needs to be “realistic…that what I want isn’t possible.” And that means, perhaps, no children of her own. “At first I was like, I want six kids. Then I went down to four, then I was down to three.and now I’m like, maybe I won’t have any,” she says glumly. “Maybe I’ll just be a good aunt…At this moment in my life, I feel like maybe I’m not supposed to have kids and all that.” Interjects Khloe: “Oh my God. Don’t be dramatic all of a sudden!” “That’s how I feel,” insists Kim, whose sister Kourtney has a son Mason, nearly 2, with love Scott Disick. “Maybe my fairy tale has a different ending than I dreamed it would. But that’s OK.”

In Kim’s defense, her life does have a lot of fairy tale elements: a dead father, an evil matriarch, an ugly sister and ogre hybrid, and a troll. Though it looks like she got Cinderella mixed in with Rumplestiltskin. Instead of spinning straw into gold, she spun a golden shower into a princess complex and a plastic surgery habit.

Kim Kardashian told Glamour that thinks she’s not meant to have kids. Via Us Weekly: “I believe in love and the dream of having a perfect relationship, but my idea…

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Amanda Seyfried Has Proper FormBy toddNovember 29, 2011


Amanda Seyfried looks like she takes about 45,000mg of thyroid medicine a day because her eyes are basically glued on, but here she is bent over in Beverly Hills yesterday. Why? Who knows. I don’t think that’s really the point here. Jesus, man. Why do you always have to be huge fag all the time?

Amanda Seyfried looks like she takes about 45,000mg of thyroid medicine a day because her eyes are basically glued on, but here she is bent over in Beverly Hills yesterday….

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Ashley Greene Is On Pan AmBy toddNovember 29, 2011

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Because what the fuck else is she gonna do, Ashley Greene has agreed to do a four episode arc on ABC’s Man Men knockoff, Pan Am. It takes place in the 1960’s and “focuses on the pilots and stewardesses of the airline as it operated at the beginning of the commercial jet age.” I just wish I could go back in time and spend some quality time getting to know her. Mostly because forensic and DNA evidence wasn’t that sophisticated back then.

Because what the fuck else is she gonna do, Ashley Greene has agreed to do a four episode arc on ABC’s Man Men knockoff, Pan Am. It takes place in…

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Lady Gaga Has StandardsBy jessNovember 29, 2011

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Lady Gaga told The Sun what she looks for in a man. Via Us Weekly:

What turns Lady Gaga on? “It ranges from a really big d-ck to a degree at Harvard,” the 25-year-old singer tells The Sun. Explains the native New Yorker (real name: Stefani Germanotta): “That’s a bit more difficult than a box of Milk Tray and Tesco flowers.” Among the pop star’s other requirements: “Talent and perseverance and pushing the boundaries of love and acceptance.”

I’d say Gaga should probably lose the checklist, but all she needs is talent and a Harvard degree and she’ll never have to leave her house again. Because chances are she scratched “really big dick” off at birth.

Lady Gaga told The Sun what she looks for in a man. Via Us Weekly: What turns Lady Gaga on? “It ranges from a really big d-ck to a degree…

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LeAnn Rimes Doesn’t Concern Herself With BrasBy toddNovember 28, 2011

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Since women should be judged solely on the size of their tits, based on these pictures of Leann Rimes shopping in Malibu, it’s obvious she’s a wonderful human being with many admirable qualities. A lot of people don’t know this, but she was a 9/11 first responder and once saved a child from drowning using only her mind. She also fought and killed a dragon who attacked a Haitian fishing village two years ago.

Since women should be judged solely on the size of their tits, based on these pictures of Leann Rimes shopping in Malibu, it’s obvious she’s a wonderful human being with…

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Demi Lovato Accidentally Pulled Her Weave Out, Danced With ItBy toddNovember 28, 2011


During a recent concert in Kansas City, Demi Lovato put a pony’s hair in the air. And waved it like she didn’t care. Or realize she looked like she was trying to flag somebody down at Sally’s Beauty Supply for a price check.

Stay around until the :47 mark. You’ll be glad you did.

During a recent concert in Kansas City, Demi Lovato put a pony’s hair in the air. And waved it like she didn’t care. Or realize she looked like she was…

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Sophie Turner Brings Enjoyment To TwitterBy toddNovember 28, 2011

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Although it was a prison colony filled with kangaroos and Aborigines, Australia has produced some pretty cool stuff. Namely, my imaginary ex-girlfriend Sophie Turner and her damn near perfect body. I say “damn near” perfect, because all the dating seminars and DVDs I have say you should make a woman feel insecure so she’ll want to have sex with you. My instructor said I’ll get the hang of it once I can go into a bar and not run and hide when a woman talks to me. He says to just focus on my breathing. Awww yeah, Sophie! You hear that?! Won’t be long now!

Although it was a prison colony filled with kangaroos and Aborigines, Australia has produced some pretty cool stuff. Namely, my imaginary ex-girlfriend Sophie Turner and her damn near perfect body….

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T.I. Has A PointBy jessNovember 28, 2011

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In the new issue of Vibe, T.I.–a supporter of gay rights–said that they’re too sensitive sometimes. I guess Glee won’t be covering “Whatever You Like.” Per TMZ:

T.I. thinks gays need to get over themselves … at least the ones who try and muzzle people from telling harmless jokes. T.I. was discussing gay rights with Vibe magazine — an issue he says he supports — and then mentioned Tracy Morgan’s controversial comments earlier this year: “Man, I will say this, the funniest joke I ever heard Tracy say during a stand-up was, ‘C’mon man, I think gay people are too sensitive. If you can take a d**k, you can take a joke.’ [Cracks up laughing.] That s**t was funny to me. And it’s kind of true.” Then T.I. unloaded … talking about oversensitivity in the gay community, which he believes betrays the First Amendment which guarantees freedom of speech. “They’re like,‘If you have an opinion against us, we’re gonna shut you down.’ … That’s not American. If you’re gay you should have the right to be gay in peace, and if you’re against it you should have the right to be against it in peace.”

Everything T.I. said makes absolutely perfect sense, so props to him. If he had this kind of clarity with his own life decisions, he’d probably have spent a lot less of his life in jail and halfway houses. If he had this kind of clarity with his vision, he’d have spent a lot less of his life in Tiny.

In the new issue of Vibe, T.I.–a supporter of gay rights–said that they’re too sensitive sometimes. I guess Glee won’t be covering “Whatever You Like.” Per TMZ: T.I. thinks gays…

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