I read a review that said the new Power Rangers movie was “actually pretty great” with such glowing praise as, “make no mistake, Power Rangers is a cash grab” and “the movie opens with a borderline-incomprehensible prologue” and “it is also, jaw-droppingly, one long Krispy Kreme commercial”, so maybe they wanted it to be great then forgot to change the headline. It remains unclear at this time. Then Rotten Tomatoes told me it has a 47% and the name of the movie is actually “Saban’s Power Rangers“. Nick Saban would have been good for an 86% at least. Maybe hire him for one of the six sequels they’re planning. Anyway, this really has nothing to do with that fact that Kara Del Toro has really big tits and these pictures I downloaded. My apologies to Kara Del Toro. I should have lead with that.
Last week we learned that Mariah Carey was demanding $50M from James Packer even though they were never married and her never even got to hit it. Then she claimed he was abusive and “mentally unstable”. Here’s something else we just learned: dude really, really, really wanted to marry Mariah Carey. Probably so he could finally seem dem titties. And is also mentally unstable.
The billionaire was clearly itching to tie the knot with Mariah, upset that his people were not moving fast enough to nail down the prenup so he could marry her on March 1st in Bora Bora…Packer’s lawyers were telling him they could not get the prenup signed, sealed and delivered by March 1st. His response … “I don’t know who’s working for who because there are a lot of names I haven’t heard before on this email chain. The people who work for me — message — do as I say or f*** off. I want to get married on March 1st. James.”…Mariah already had a dress, the flowers were ordered and all the flights for the guests were secured.
He seems chill. So what was the hold up with this prenup? GOOD GOD MAN.
Packer’s lawyers clearly felt the prenup was complicated, sending Mariah’s team a 100 page document outlining the specifics. The details in the document are fascinating. Among the many conditions … if Packer gave Mariah a piece of jewelry or anything else, she would have to give it back if they broke up UNLESS he sent her a signed note saying it was a gift.
If you need a 100 pages to explain the specifics of your love, I don’t even think you want to see titties. Seems a bit counterproductive to seeing titties. So why couldn’t they get married at all?
…because Nick Cannon hadn’t signed the divorce docs. Mariah and James knew this, but they were going to call the wedding a “commitment ceremony” and pass themselves off as husband and wife.
Donald Trump’s hatred of women extends to not letting the Kim Kardashian robbery news cycle live, but it’s Monday, so Kris Jenner is trying again. Basically, Kim Kardashian is more protected than actual sexual assault victims. Take that, Donald!
Sources close to Kim tell us … her new security detail includes former members of the Secret Service, who will be armed to the teeth. There will be at least one team of 2 hired muscles (minimum) everywhere she goes. We’re also told her car will be “armored.” We’re told after the Paris robbery Kim met with some ex-special force members from the Israeli army, ex-CIA agents as well as former Secret Service members. Kanye met with owners of 2 top security firms. We’re also told Kris Jenner is heavily involved in security meetings, and plans to get protection for Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall and Kylie … stat. We’ve heard nothing about Rob.
Rob’s boobs can’t be monetized, so I understand this decision. But this must be serious since Kim hasn’t posted a selfie to Instagram in a week. But if anybody needs this type of security, it’s the Kardashians. Especially Khloe. If we lose her, our society and civilization as we know it, would crumble and cease to exist. I take that back. If we even lose one single Kardashian, we might as well just close America, because it would be hollow and meaningless. Why bother going on living? That’s not a future we want for our kids.
Shoutout to whoever gets to follow this around every day. Respect.
I’m gonna give you a break from all this Brangelina stuff (because THERE’S MORE), so here’s Hillary Clinton doing Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis. I have to admit, for a person whose health is in rapid decline and who suffers from severe brain damage, she’s seems to be holding up pretty well. Or maybe it’s the body double. What does the LIBERAL MEDIA NOT WANT US TO KNOW?! I’m sure Breitbart readers will continue to throw up shit hoping something, anything sticks. You know, if they have time from tweeting pictures of gas ovens to Jewish reporters.
Nothing says “New York Fashion Week” quite like Target. And nothing says “dead eyes” and “big tits” like Emily Ratajkowski (NSFW). And nothing says “the Target logo as a metaphor” than this Instagram post from last week.
And nothing says “please stop using quotes its getting annoying” than me ending this post.