Links That Win The GoldBy toddJuly 24, 2009

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Jennifer Connelly in a bikini. Um, yes. Yes, please. [Egotastic]

The most brilliant woman in the world [College Humor]

Kendra Wilkinson topless
wedding pics (NSFW) [TaxiDriver Movie]

210 reasons not to get drunk and pass out [COED Magazine]

Eliza Dushku in FHM [Popoholic]

Tara Reid is still a mess [Hollywood Tuna]

Jaslene Gonzalez
is some chick [Heyman’s Hustle]

NOTE: Not that any of you care, but the best friend of somebody I love won a gold medal with the United States Open Men’s basketball team at the Maccabiah Games on Tuesday night by defeating Israel 95-86 in overtime. So I just wanted to say congratulations on a fantastic achievement and thanks for bringing the gold back to the USA.

Jennifer Connelly in a bikini. Um, yes. Yes, please. [Egotastic] The most brilliant woman in the world [College Humor] Kendra Wilkinson topless wedding pics (NSFW) [TaxiDriver Movie] 210 reasons not…

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Bikini Girl Is, Well, You KnowBy toddJuly 22, 2009

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I know this site is supposed to be about actual celebrities or whatever, but that was before American Idol’s Katrina Darrell (aka Bikini Girl) decided to prance around in a bikini. She’s not particularly that hot or anything, but she’s hot enough I guess. She has a vagina and my penis likes to go in vaginas, so I guess that can be a good starting point.

I know this site is supposed to be about actual celebrities or whatever, but that was before American Idol’s Katrina Darrell (aka Bikini Girl) decided to prance around in a…

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Madonna Can’t Be BotheredBy toddJuly 22, 2009

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Hey, remember that time Madonna cried on stage after two people got killed and eight people were placed in critical condition when a rigging collapsed while they were constructing Madonna’s set then she went to the hospital to visit them and said she would do anything to help? Yeah, apparently that doesn’t involve cooperating with the authorities. The Sun reports:

MADONNA has refused to co-operate with officials probing a stadium collapse tragedy, it was claimed last night. Two technicians, including a Brit, died last week when a temporary roof at the home ground of Marseilles FC, France, fell on 50 workers before one of her gigs. A French newspaper said Madonna, 50, had “declined” to be interviewed by investigators. Magistrates say she is an important witness as she has a £60million contract with Live Nation, which was organising the concert.

Well, of course Madonna wouldn’t condescend to talk to the police after her show killed two people and critically injured eight more. Why should she? She’s Madonna. Besides, it would be difficult to go into a police station on the thing Xerses rode on surrounded by twenty Malaysian boys in mascara and bejeweled thongs feeding her grapes as the six Bengal tigers with diamonds on their claws lie at her feet as she shouts orders to sacrifice another virgin. “Get her you insolent fools!”, Madonna would say, “Bring her to me so I may taste her blood on thine lips!” You know, or something like that.

Hey, remember that time Madonna cried on stage after two people got killed and eight people were placed in critical condition when a rigging collapsed while they were constructing Madonna’s…

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Lisa Rinna Is SubtleBy toddJuly 22, 2009

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I wonder if Lisa Rinna thought if she went out with her huge tits stuffed in a tight shirt with no bra that people would want to take her picture to give her the attention she so desperately craves? Nah, probably not.

I wonder if Lisa Rinna thought if she went out with her huge tits stuffed in a tight shirt with no bra that people would want to take her picture…

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Dina Lohan Is DelusionalBy toddJuly 22, 2009

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It’s pretty safe to say that Lindsay Lohan has never really had a mother. I mean, not in the MacDuff sense, but mostly because Dina Lohan would rather party than provide any maternal guidance and she would rather be an enabler and make a million excuses than be someone who would force Lindsay to be responsible for her actions. But seriously, are you fucking kidding me right now, bitch?
OK! Magazine reports:

If there’s one person that’s solidly in Lindsay Lohan’s corner these days, it’s her momager, Dina Lohan, who praises her daughter as a “genius” who just wants to be successful in her career and live happily with a family. Lindsay’s most recent foray into the entertainment business is the production company she just started, a venture Dina is all about. “She’s a genius. Such a good heart,” Dina told OK! at the Charlotte Russe 2009 Fall Launch in NYC, adding that Lindsay will also be heading behind the camera. “Lindsay will direct one day. She loves directing,” Dina revealed to OK!.

At only 23, Lindsay is already a washed up whore who pissed all her opportunities away with speedballs and semen, so I can imagine you’d have to flip a thousand pages to find “genius” on a list of words that describe Lindsay Lohan. This slut couldn’t direct traffic, yet her mom thinks she’ll be directing movies in a town where she couldn’t even get a role playing herself in a home movie. I’m sure directing cocks in your ass can get pretty technical, but I have a feeling a studio might not be as impressed with the footage as you might think.

Lindsay Lohan with a watergun. Um, okay, sure:

It’s pretty safe to say that Lindsay Lohan has never really had a mother. I mean, not in the MacDuff sense, but mostly because Dina Lohan would rather party than…

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Links Better Than Erin Andrews NudeBy toddJuly 20, 2009

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No, I didn’t miss the Erin Andrews nude video, but since she and ESPN are suing everybody who tries to post it, I’ll be goddamned if I’m going to post it here. But you’re more than welcome to download any virus you please.

WTF Blanket? And you thought backwards robes couldn’t get any better. [College Humor]

Ann Friel topless [Egotastic]

Lindsay Lohan toe [TaxiDriver Movie]

Miss COED: Anissa Holmes. God. Damn. [COED Magazine]

Chris Brown apologizes [I’m Not Obsessed]

Blake Lively Rolling Stone outtakes [Popoholic]

Paula Abdul is worthless, insane [Fatback Media]

Katie Price can’t contain her boobs [Hollywood Tuna]

Holly Madison peep show. Sure, why not. [Heyman Hustle]

No, I didn’t miss the Erin Andrews nude video, but since she and ESPN are suing everybody who tries to post it, I’ll be goddamned if I’m going to post…

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This Is BetterBy toddJuly 20, 2009

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So apparently, the only way for AnnaLynne McCord to look sorta kinda hot is if she pretends to make out with another chick and wears comically oversized sunglasses. Mostly because you can’t really see her face. Because looking at her face is only something you would be forced to do on a dare or if you were about to be blindfolded and forced to kneel in front of a Taliban flag. It’s also fun if you pretend the other chick is trying to reach in between AnnaLynne’s legs. It’s also fun to pretend to be a pirate!

So apparently, the only way for AnnaLynne McCord to look sorta kinda hot is if she pretends to make out with another chick and wears comically oversized sunglasses. Mostly because…

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Links Better Than Pregnant BoobsBy toddJuly 17, 2009
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Olivia Munn Sex Soundboard [Coed Magazine]

5 quotes you should stop using. Like right now. [College Humor]

Bonnie Bernstein upskirt on ESPN [TaxiDriver Movie]

Rosario Dawson in a bikini [Egotastic]

Rihanna is see through [Hollywood Tuna]

First look at Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow [Popoholic]

Janet Jackson is single [I’m Not Obssessed]

Greatest photographer ever? [Fatback Media]

Olivia Munn Sex Soundboard [Coed Magazine] 5 quotes you should stop using. Like right now. [College Humor] Bonnie Bernstein upskirt on ESPN [TaxiDriver Movie] Rosario Dawson in a bikini [Egotastic]…

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Kim Kardashian Is A Good SalesmanBy toddJuly 17, 2009

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Here’s more pics of Kim Kardashian in a bikini whoring for Sierra Mist. My penis can’t handle carbonation, so I’m trying to figure out how Kim’s huge boobs on a trampoline are supposed to make me thirsty for the clean, crisp zing of naturally flavored lemon-lime soda. If Sierra Mist just wants me to jerk off, I think they should just come out and say it.

Here’s more pics of Kim Kardashian in a bikini whoring for Sierra Mist. My penis can’t handle carbonation, so I’m trying to figure out how Kim’s huge boobs on a…

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